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Thread: Why? Why? Why?

  1. #1
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    Default Why? Why? Why?

    Alright, so this will probably qualify as a rant and I apologize to you ladies in advance if you're tired of the bitching but I'm going to post this anyway because dammnit, you all are the ONLY ones who will understand what I am talking about.

    WHY is it that when you're dating someone, he insists that your job is just that and you're not a bad person bc of your profession yet when you break up, it is his first line of defense/insult to throw at you. You know, the whole "You're just like every other stripper blah blah blah" line. WHY?

    WHY is it that even your good friends who know how irritated you get from all of the stupid, identical questions you have to answer for everyone and their mother (and father and brother and sister etc)about the profession just can't seem to help themselves and must ask the same questions. WHY?

    WHY is it that people judge even when they have never even met you based on the fact that they have heard you dance? WHY?

    Alright, like I said, I'm sorry if you all are tired of these rants but seriously, no one else understands my perspective. Believe me, I just tried to talk to my best friend of 8 years and all I ended up getting from that was Rant # 2 listed above. (God love her though)

    So if any of you have some compassion to spare today just humor me please and say "Ahh, it's ok. I understand. I hate it too. etc." Thanks ladies.

    (and, breathe!)

  2. #2
    beauty21queen
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    I think its because there all ignorant to our job and they will never know unless they work there other than that they never know they're all just stupid and i wnt to kick their asses

  3. #3
    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    I hear you! I'm going through this now with a guy I recently dated. Only he created an "anonymous" myspace account to tell me what's wrong with me....of course all going to me being a stripper. "No wonder you're so cold in relationships blahblahblah"

    any guy that says "I don't judge you for what you do" has just, in fact, judged you. I mean, nobody would say that if you were a teacher or a nurse, right?

    So be wary of guys that say shit like that. it's like they are trying to convince themselves.

    The people that don't talk about it are the ones I like to keep around....girl friends included.

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    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    I never really thought of that Emily....you are completely right.

    Sorry ya'll are going through this.

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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    A ex-bf did that to me too. For many things I do not know him anymore. And ahh yes I understand.... people just dont get it sometimes.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Because they can't come up with a better comeback. It simple to go racial, stereotypical, etc. on someone.

    If he had some sort of intellect he would have insulted your personal characteristics besides the obvious(society's negative perception).

    So don't worry about it...fuck it. His loss.

  7. #7
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Quote Originally Posted by atlcheet01
    So if any of you have some compassion to spare today just humor me please and say "Ahh, it's ok. I understand. I hate it too. etc." Thanks ladies.

    (and, breathe!)

    So basically you are saying you already know why?

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Because they have nothing else to throw at you but stupid, cheap shots like that.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

  9. #9
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Breakups invariably bring out the mean--read, wounded--side of a guy. He will say nasty, hurtful things. Not pretty, but a pretty standard part of the male grieving process. Put another way, even if you were a corporate tax attorney or software programmer, he'd still accuse you of being a cold, lying b*tch.

    Chin up. You'll find a new, better guy.

  10. #10
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella21
    Because they have nothing else to throw at you but stupid, cheap shots like that.
    Ah no.

    If you really want me to - I will send it to you in a private message. It is far to raw for the political correctness on this board.

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    Yes, this is just what I was talking about girls! Thank you! Of course, I've figured out why men and people in general love to use the "well, you're a stripper...." put-down but like I said, it is still incredibly frusterating. I am trying to "keep my chin up" as Chicagoeditor suggested and I really think that was a great point that you made ab no matter what I do (i.e. practicing law or corp. exec etc.), people can always use it against me based on some stereotype.

    You know, one healthy thing did occur bc of my bad expereince with the ex and actually, I've thought this before too when I was being put down personally or when strippers in general are being put down. One of the put downs goes along the lines of, "You're just like all the other strippers in the club...." What that is supposed to mean is I am a "lazy, idiot, coke-snorting, money-hungry, whore" (based on the stereotype!) but I have always taken it as a compliment meaning I am a "tough, independent woman who knows what she wants and is not waiting around on anyone else to give it to her." I guess a lot of guys just can't handle that kind of woman.

    Alright, again, thanks! It all helps to hear your comments if only to know someone can empathize! I hope all of you have a terrific week!

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    P.S. Deogol, you seem to have an opinion on this you haven't actually posted yet. If you have time, I'd like to hear your perspective-shoot me a private message if you'd like.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why? Why? Why?

    I had to break up friendships because I'd meet someone new and be introduced as, 'y'know, the stripper?' Like, yay, I'm The Stripper! Fucktards.


    Look like a woman
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    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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