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Thread: If She Dances FREE for you...

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    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default If She Dances FREE for you...

    Been out to eat a couple of times with a dancer who I met at a club and PAID for dances the first time we met, but every since then she refuses to take $$$ from me because she says it complicates us... I agree that it's never simple especially with a stripper, but it's not like I have slept with her or spent a lot of $$$ ITC or OTC. Anyone else have this happen and what are your thoughts?

  2. #2
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    I predict it'll get messy, and quick, unless you two sort out the following: a) you crazy kids are a potential couple (in which case you'll definitely want to stop visiting her at work) or b) she likes being paid in food stuffs instead of cash. There's a third possibility, of course, which is she's setting you up for additional OTC fees.

    To answer your question: I've been denied dances by dancers I knew OTC ("We're friends, it wouldn't be right"), and I've taken a couple of free dances from dancers who, for unimaginable reasons, took a shine to me on our first meeting in the club.

    Best of luck, fella.

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    Veteran Member Rockette's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    I would try posting this on the Junkie side (blue forums) as you might get more of a response there. Sorry I can't help, but I don't permit my boyfriends (the ones that find out) to come into the club, ever.
    Isocrates: “Democracy destroys itself because it abuses its right to freedom and equality. Because it teaches its citizens to consider audacity as a right, lawlessness as a freedom, abrasive speech as equality, and anarchy as progress.”

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    I had a girl do something crazy like this just past monday. Bought six dances, when seventh song came along i was like "Hold on" and she was like "don't worry about it." But in this case it's not a surprise. She's trying to cultivate a regular. I hate to tell her that i can't be that for her. Maybe that's a thread in and unto itself.

    Went over to eight, i paid her for all of them, and asked her not to do it again.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    I hate to be a prick about this, but if you're asking you're not in control of your side of the engagement.

    If you're not in control, someone else is.

    Boss, Mom, Dad, Girlfriend, Forklift operator, or stripper. If you don't know what you want out of the situation with clarity, you'll overanalyze it to death.

    You're at a juncture. The relationship is in question. What is it? Strippers depend on the PL to let their emotions lead them to their wallet to buy the reaction their emotions want.

    You need to answer this question.

    "It complicates us how? I want dances, I'll buy dances. That's the point. We go out to eat, I pay. What's complicated about it? Are my actions confusing you?"

    Sure I've had this happen. It takes me exactly 10 seconds to clear it up. But then again, I have no resolve in explaining exactly what I want out of the relationship. If I want to date her, no point in being underhanded about it.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Sounds similar to the post you made at the start of another thread, only this time your subject is sigular instead of plural....

    "Just "good friends" with dancers..."
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showthread.php?t=71295

    Quote Originally Posted by laplover69
    I have known many dancers over the years and become just "good friends" for various reasons with 3 in particular OTC. I am secure enough and try and not be jealous even though I DO REALLY CARE about these gals, but understand that it is BUSINESS while they are working and maybe a little PERSONAL while we spend time OTC usually out to eat, etc.. I am to the point where I don't spend any money for dances and definetely not labled a "regular" but more as a "friend" and have told them that I genuinely care about them more than just a "paid grope" and they all at least seem to believe and respect me... BTW, I don't get dances from anyone else while they are working either... My question for the dancers is if I was iterested in taking these "platonic friendships" to the next level how would you go bout it without risking losing these great "friendships"?

    Honestly, my first reaction to your post is that your fishing for compliments like "You da man!" or "Wow, no dancer has ever given us free dances!" or even "Free dance? She must want to be your baby's mamma!" .... *pffft.*


    Just out of mutual respect, if a dancer friend felt uncomfortable taking money for dances, than I would feel uncomfortable having her dance for free. Especially if I considered us friends and not just a customer with a dancer who's got poor business sense. Just my opinion of course.
    Last edited by verfolgung; 10-20-2006 at 09:49 AM.
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


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    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by verfolgung
    Sounds similar to the post you made at the start of another thread, only this time your subject is sigular instead of plural....

    "Just "good friends" with dancers..."
    http://www.stripperweb.com/forum/showthread.php?t=71295




    Honestly, my first reaction to your post is that your fishing for compliments like "You da man!" or "Wow, no dancer has ever given us free dances!" or even "Free dance? She must want to be your baby's mamma!" .... *pffft.*


    Just out of mutual respect, if a dancer friend felt uncomfortable taking money for dances, than I would feel uncomfortable having her dance for free. Especially if I considered us friends and not just a customer with a dancer who's got poor business sense. Just my opinion of course.
    No, I'm not fishing. Just a recent rather unique event that happened.

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Strippers depend on the PL to let their emotions lead them to their wallet to buy the reaction their emotions want.
    Well said.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Chicagoeditor
    This wasn't after a proctological exam, was it?
    ::spits cola all over keyboard:: Damnit!!!

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Ha! My hairdresser does my hair for free because she is my friend and I send her referrals. My doctor friend calls in scripts for me without an appointment because I help him with business planning. She likes you, considers you a friend and confidant. No big deal....but it wont get you in her pants any faster.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by laplover69
    Been out to eat a couple of times with a dancer who I met at a club and PAID for dances the first time we met, but every since then she refuses to take $$$ from me because she says it complicates us... I agree that it's never simple especially with a stripper, but it's not like I have slept with her or spent a lot of $$$ ITC or OTC. Anyone else have this happen and what are your thoughts?
    Yes, it's happened to me twice. Both ladies are still very good friends but, three to five years into the relationships I have never gotten into either lady's pants. It's a trust issue. A good dancer will always find customers but, dancer or not, a good friend is much harder to come by.

    Aside from the two ladies I just mentioned, I have gotten more freebies than I can keep track of. Free dances, discounted VIP, home cooked meals, dinners, lunches, birthday and holiday gifts. At my age, I have enough cologne to last me for the rest of my life. What does it all mean? Beats me, I don't question other people's generosity. I just figure I'm doing something right and continue to act accordingly.

    Enjoy the ladies and their generosity but don't harbor any false expectations.
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    Senior Member xxernestoxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by laplover69
    Been out to eat a couple of times with a dancer who I met at a club and PAID for dances the first time we met, but every since then she refuses to take $$$ from me because she says it complicates us... I agree that it's never simple especially with a stripper, but it's not like I have slept with her or spent a lot of $$$ ITC or OTC. Anyone else have this happen and what are your thoughts?

    the closest ive been to that
    is having a dancer give me 2 free dances
    this after paying for 3 in the vip so i doubt she
    has feelings or anything of that nature.

    i wish you much luck my friend,
    this could get complicated
    every guy dreams of dating s stripper
    but when it happens its nothing like what they dreampt of.
    i hope it goes well for you.

    cheers
    -Ernesto
    beauty is flawed, and perfection is non existent a bleeding heart occurs when love and hate intersect.
    hate is a false pretense given to one by a bleeding heart. lust is not a friend of love, yet it gets the heart pumping. love is an emotion in its own right, it can lead to many difficult crossroads, the avenue of sorrow and apathy are in downtown heart ache, population one too many.

    myspace.com/ernestofrommyspace

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    Veteran Member Lady's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    im not going to say i have never given free dances to ppl that spend good moeny on me. I dont do OTC .. but if I did .. I would give those custys some free attention knowing I would earn int back, probably double, by waiting till we were at the mall or something.

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    Featured Member lunchbox's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    I had a girl do something crazy like this just past monday. Bought six dances, when seventh song came along i was like "Hold on" and she was like "don't worry about it." But in this case it's not a surprise. She's trying to cultivate a regular. I hate to tell her that i can't be that for her. Maybe that's a thread in and unto itself.

    Went over to eight, i paid her for all of them, and asked her not to do it again.
    Would you do the same thing to a bartender?

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    Senior Member xxernestoxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    I had a girl do something crazy like this just past monday. Bought six dances, when seventh song came along i was like "Hold on" and she was like "don't worry about it." But in this case it's not a surprise. She's trying to cultivate a regular. I hate to tell her that i can't be that for her. Maybe that's a thread in and unto itself.

    Went over to eight, i paid her for all of them, and asked her not to do it again.

    wow
    she did two free
    and you chose to pay?

    that is a rare sight in a strip club.
    well not really

    a few weeks
    ago i was in the vip
    i paid for 5 songs
    and she threw in 2 free afterwards
    of course i paid for an aditional 2
    i felt bad cause she has to pay for those free songs
    at least 2 more lets her break even


    on another occasion last saturday
    i was in the vip
    my friend paid this girl
    and i was at the tip bar
    she tells me my friend paid her
    and takes me to the vip
    it was fun and all...
    but she went for 10 songs
    and then told my i had to pay for half of them
    lucky for me i had the money to cover it
    but that was potentially bad.








    cheers
    -Ernesto
    beauty is flawed, and perfection is non existent a bleeding heart occurs when love and hate intersect.
    hate is a false pretense given to one by a bleeding heart. lust is not a friend of love, yet it gets the heart pumping. love is an emotion in its own right, it can lead to many difficult crossroads, the avenue of sorrow and apathy are in downtown heart ache, population one too many.

    myspace.com/ernestofrommyspace

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Throwing in a few free dances (as mentioned by Madcap) is good business for a regular. Doing "just" freebies seems kind of silly. Why not just take it OTC and be done with it?

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Senior Member xxernestoxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR
    Throwing in a few free dances (as mentioned by Madcap) is good business for a regular. Doing "just" freebies seems kind of silly. Why not just take it OTC and be done with it?

    FBR

    hahaha
    well said

    cheers
    -Ernesto
    beauty is flawed, and perfection is non existent a bleeding heart occurs when love and hate intersect.
    hate is a false pretense given to one by a bleeding heart. lust is not a friend of love, yet it gets the heart pumping. love is an emotion in its own right, it can lead to many difficult crossroads, the avenue of sorrow and apathy are in downtown heart ache, population one too many.

    myspace.com/ernestofrommyspace

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR
    Throwing in a few free dances (as mentioned by Madcap) is good business for a regular. Doing "just" freebies seems kind of silly. Why not just take it OTC and be done with it?

    FBR
    Huh? That makes no sense. Not everyone wants to do OTC. Throwing in a freebie is just a little game. Most of the time, as in above examples, the guys will STILL pay.........

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by laplover69
    Been out to eat a couple of times with a dancer who I met at a club and PAID for dances the first time we met, but every since then she refuses to take $$$ from me because she says it complicates us...
    Kat...hon...read the above quote. The dude says she wont take money now. That means shes dancing for him for free...not just an occasional freebee.

    My point was, again, that a freebee once in a while as a business inducement is a good thing but if shes not charging him at all for dances whats the point? Might as well take it OTC.

    Am I missing your point or what?

    With fondest disagreement to the Katmeister

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by lunchbox
    Would you do the same thing to a bartender?
    Nope. But then bartenders aren't grinding on my cock when they may or may not, in reality, find me disgusting, either.

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    Senior Member xxernestoxx's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    Nope. But then bartenders aren't grinding on my cock when they may or may not, in reality, find me disgusting, either.

    hahaha
    excellent counter point,
    i personally have never had a bartender
    grind on me there,
    but durring a lap dance its happend plenty of times lol

    i do believe you won that round haha


    cheers
    -Ernesto
    beauty is flawed, and perfection is non existent a bleeding heart occurs when love and hate intersect.
    hate is a false pretense given to one by a bleeding heart. lust is not a friend of love, yet it gets the heart pumping. love is an emotion in its own right, it can lead to many difficult crossroads, the avenue of sorrow and apathy are in downtown heart ache, population one too many.

    myspace.com/ernestofrommyspace

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    Featured Member lunchbox's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    Nope. But then bartenders aren't grinding on my cock when they may or may not, in reality, find me disgusting, either.
    So you would take a free drink, but not a dance? Not only that, but you payed for a dance after you said stop, which was given for free, then bought one more, and followed that by telling her never do that again? So even though you intend to see her again, you can't be a regular.

    I find you're behaviour inexplicable, not just to me, but because I've never read a TR or story where someone else did anything like this. Next time rather than being so offended, tip the value of what was given free, and say thank you.

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by lunchbox
    So you would take a free drink, but not a dance? Not only that, but you payed for a dance after you said stop, which was given for free, then bought one more, and followed that by telling her never do that again? So even though you intend to see her again, you can't be a regular.

    I find you're behaviour inexplicable, not just to me, but because I've never read a TR or story where someone else did anything like this. Next time rather than being so offended, tip the value of what was given free, and say thank you.
    Reread my post.

    When did i even give the impression that i was offended in the slightest bit? If i was offended i'd have TOLD her not to do it again. No offense, man, but you are lousy at reading between the lines. And i did say thank you (as if that part is between anyone but me and her). I always thank the girl for dancing for me.

    As for intending to see her again, i DO intend to see her again. But i also intend to see half a dozen other girls at that club again. As well as other girls around town. Regulars go for one girl. There are others who work on her nights that i also like.

    As for finding my behavior inexplicable, welcome to the club, dude, there's a million people who find my behavior inexplicable... Including myself.

    Lastly, i'm telling you to have some manners and not to tell me what to do.
    Last edited by Madcap; 10-30-2006 at 09:08 AM.

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    Featured Member lunchbox's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    When did i even give the impression that i was offended in the slightest bit? If i was offended i'd have TOLD her not to do it again. No offense, man, but you are lousy at reading between the lines. And i did say thank you (as if that part is between anyone but me and her). I always thank the girl for dancing for me.
    So had you told her not to do it again, I could get the impression that you were offended? Form your first post:

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    asked her not to do it again.
    Ahem... Maybe that's why I found the original story so incredulous.

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: If She Dances FREE for you...

    "Don't ever do that again."

    "Please don't do that again."

    You don't see a difference there?

    You pay more attention to language than any person on this board, but you only pay attention to your interpretation of it (which isn't really paying attention at all).

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