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Thread: Male thinking

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Male thinking

    On this other forum site I frequent. The men there say that this one trick they have works. They go to a SC and sit at the bar. They talk solely to the bartender and ignore the dancers all day. They basically brush the dancers off. Apparantly this works for them into peeking the dancers attentions, and giving them numbers for outside interest. I think it is a load of bull what do you all think of it?

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    Veteran Member tmlsuperspice's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    If you're hanging out at the bar all night, ignoring the dancers, then you're not buying dances. If you're not buying dances, then why should I care who you are? My only outside interests involve my rent and my bills.

  3. #3
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    wouldn't work with me, nor with any of the girls i know in the club. why would anyone be the least bit impressed with a surly asshole who's not spending anything and who thinks he's just so fucking cute because of it? Lame.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    While working at a club this guy who was a friend of the mgr, was acting like a real jerk to some of the dancers. I mean an unneccesary jerk, with the psycho felon "don't fuck with me" stare down. Maybe he thought he was cool or just saw Casino or something, who knows. I just thought he was an asshole. Now to some of the girls he was nice to. That is fine with me, but there is no reason to be rude to the others.

    I mean if women pull that shit, they would be stuck up bitches.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    These scumfucks are the lowest of the low. They CLAIM to do this, but actually.....

    You'll have a seat or stand at the bar needing a quick refresher before you hit the rounds again. They start talking to you, unsolicited, about how they are good buddies with the bartender and management. Potential buyers may be watching so you smile and feign interest.

    Predator uses this to hone in on you to start pressuring you to give him your number so nothing in return. He won't even buy you a drink. You want to ash your smoke into his eye and extinguish it with your redbull, but he knows this. He will just keep talking to you until you are so frustrated that you would rather sit with Mr. OctopusHands in the corner because at least he's paying. Or so the story goes....

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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  6. #6
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    I wonder if these dudes who do this realize how sad they look. If they bought the dancer a drink they might really have a shot at getting what they wanted.

    But hey, I have a new Chuck Norris-ism. "When Chuck hits the titty bar, strippers pay HIM."

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Some guys think that if they are friends with the bartender, mgr, or owner that they don't HAVE TO buy dances. They also think that you are more apt to give them some special "extra" treatment.

    Yes this may not work for some dancers. but some dances flock to the jerk. Even after the 100x he's been there he hasn't bought a dance yet. Sure he nice and chummy, but so is that guy who will buy a dance from dancer. When that guys is at the bar (usually stays tell closing), I am in the dressing room getting ready to go home, why waste my time.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by madmaxine
    But hey, I have a new Chuck Norris-ism. "When Chuck hits the titty bar, strippers pay HIM."

    I love it!! Are you going to use it as a taglin Maxine? If not, can I steal it and quote you? I need a new tagline! Your rule!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Featured Member tootsie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    f*uck those kind of custys! they annoy the hell out of me.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by tootsie
    f*uck those kind of custys! they annoy the hell out of me.
    Here here. I wonder what the djs and bartenders think of their friends who do that? Do they encourage it, or don't notice it? I think they don't notice it.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Your title is an oxymoron.

    Which explains the thread.


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    I think they're just cheap and watching the show for free.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by lilithmorrigan
    Your title is an oxymoron.

    Which explains the thread.
    Well a lot of things guys think are oxymorons. I was pondering on what the title should say. That was the best I could think of. Anyway, you do have to admit that this does happen.

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    I don't pay any attention to guys at the bar. Guy isn't buying = I'm outta there.

    What Katrine described is more accurate about the way these assholes operate though. They don't just sit there and ignore all the girls - they sit there at the bar and hassle strippers as they stop to get a water or soda. I learned to just ignore them, act like I don't hear them. Most of the morons will keep yelling at me or start tapping me on the arm or something. I just put on my ignore shield until I get my drink and speed off to the next PAYING customer. Occasionally I will have to turn and shoot him an evil-eye and snap a nasty shoo-off at him, if he's too persistent and I get annoyed. But mostly the ignore thing works fine.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: Male thinking

    I have actually gotten quite a few dances from guys who never get dances from other girls and who are "friends of the bartender" but then I found out that the bartender was talking me up because he likes me (in a non-sexual way). On the other hand, I have talked to a few of these guys when we were slow for a few songs, offered a dance and gotten a no. I never re-approach them or give them the time of day. A lot of them either 1)are really lame or 2)think that our club is the coolest bar in town, which it may very well be, since our town is boring.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    You mean the ones who think because he is the bartender's chummy buddy, he is also every dancer in the club chummy buddy.

    On occasion a dancer will tell the bartender to mind his friend. If the friend gets too much out of pocket, then the mgr will ban the friend. If dancers can't have annoying friends in the SC, then bartenders and djs shouldn't be allowed to have them in the SC either.

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    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    There was acutally a book written a while ago....

    "How to Date an Exotic Dancer"



    (There are previous threads on this book on both the Pink & Blue sites)

    Basically the purpose of this behavior is to avoid being catagorized as a "customer". A big "NO NO" according to the book. The thought is once a dancer views one as a customer than the chances of being viewed as a potential parter are greatly diminished. So if you don't spend any money on her than she won't view you as a customer. ... Well than, one might ask if you don't spend any money on the dancer how can you get the opportunity to have a conversation with a dancer and avoid being written off as a cheap ass waste of time? Well, among several other tips in the book, it actually suggests sitting at the bar and befriending the bartender using him/her as an "in" with the dancers. Either dancers will be curious about the person who is friendly with the bartender or your bartender buddy may refer you to dancers.

    Just thought I'd point out one possible source for this behavior.

    The funny part is this thread is called "Male Thinking" but the behavior may have partially originated from a book written by a woman. Heh.
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by sassfire
    On this other forum site I frequent. The men there say that this one trick they have works. They go to a SC and sit at the bar. They talk solely to the bartender and ignore the dancers all day. They basically brush the dancers off. Apparantly this works for them into peeking the dancers attentions, and giving them numbers for outside interest. I think it is a load of bull what do you all think of it?
    This works with the same effectiveness as any hustle works. If the mark is clever enough to know a scam when they see it, the con will probably strike out. If a potential mark is naive and vulnerable, the con will probably score what they're looking for.

    Sadly, with the way SC's have gotten in regards to hiring anything with tits and throwing them to the wolves with no sales training whatsoever, these guys probably hit enough times out of ten to make the effort worthwhile. They don't need to bat 1.000 after all.

    But if a dancer is keenly focused on making money, this really shouldn't be a concern to her. If anything she should openly embrace it because it means that if the con succeeds, both a potential competitor and a deadbeat customer are are taken out of the equation. More money and less bullshit for her.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by lilithmorrigan
    Your title is an oxymoron.

    Which explains the thread.


    Tee hee hee. That was good!!
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  20. #20
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by sassfire
    Here here. I wonder what the djs and bartenders think of their friends who do that? Do they encourage it, or don't notice it? I think they don't notice it.
    we hate it. i bartended at my club for months (before i crossed over to the dark side ), and trust me...EVERYONE hates them. And 99% of the people who sit at the bar being rude and not tipping or spending are NOT our "friends". most of them are doing the same thing to the bartenders, waitresses and DJs as they are to teh dancers--wasting all our fucking time and barely (if at all) tipping us for it. They're all out to a) get something for free, b) stroke their egos, and c) go on a power trip by messing with all the girls there. Some chip on their shoulder about women I guess, or maybe they just can't get laid. But I cannot tell you how many bitchfests I've had with the DJ and other bartenders about these morons.

    Usually when we actually have *friends* that come in (as opposed to morons who *think* they're all tight with the bartender/staff) they will at least BUY drinks (instead of bitching about how they should get free drinks b/c they're so fucking special) and tip the girls onstage. Same goes for cool regulars who don't really do lapdances and just want to drink and talk to the bartender and dancers...the difference is, they will TIP for our time.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    I always thought that the chummy buddies really were the bartenders/djs friend. I mean must of them do stay tell tell closing. I assume that it is okay if a co-worker has his friend, but when I danced I hated when they interfer with my work. Sure go ahead and visit your friend but don't get in the way of my money (I wasn't good on the hustle part so any annoyish will cost me dearly). Not too many dancers bring their friends in the clubs.

    This doesn't solely happen in SC, this happens a lot. In nightclubs and bars. I think every bartender/dj had to deal with a friend who is only using him to attract prospects.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Holy. That book actually exists? I thought it was a joke!


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by doc-catfish
    This works with the same effectiveness as any hustle works. If the mark is clever enough to know a scam when they see it, the con will probably strike out. If a potential mark is naive and vulnerable, the con will probably score what they're looking for.
    Well, yeah - this is the key. No it doesn't work every time, and it probably doesn't work 1 time in 10. But if there are 11 dancers in the bar...

    I mean ANY approach will "work" if by work you mean "Keep doing it until someone says okay." Sooner or later SOMEONE is going to say okay. Some people - probably self-hating and irretrievably screwed up - like for people to treat them like this (me, I don't get it. I tend to like the guys that actually, you know, LIKE me). They like "having to work for it." Mysterious, but true. If you plough through all the people who aren't like that, then all the people who are like that but who don't think you are worth the effort, you will, eventually, get to the people who are like that, and can't do any better than you. But the same goes for the "Nice dress wanna fuck?" approach.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

  24. #24
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine
    I love it!! Are you going to use it as a taglin Maxine? If not, can I steal it and quote you? I need a new tagline! Your rule!

    It's OK to use it, the Norris-isms are compiled like that.

    I only know of one man who picked up a worthy lady in the strip club without paying. He was a Navy SEAL who jumped onstage & did "The Helicopter" with his penis. He made off with the club owner's daughter.

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    Veteran Member sassfire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Male thinking

    Lmfao!!!!

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