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Thread: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

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    Senior Member nekosmeow's Avatar
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    rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    ok quick question.
    how does a person be freindly and non-stuckup with out participating in the local rumor mill at work? ive just been raked over the coals at my club over something other people said at the sister clubs in my town about me and i dont want it to happen again. just not talking to my coworkers doesnt seem like a good opition to me.
    thanxs
    neko
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    God/dess krchab99's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    baby if you crack the code on this one i will give a million bucks.

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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    Well, it might be impossible to not have someone talk about you, at one point or another, but you can keep it down to a min by NEVER EVER responding to rumors, about yourself or other people.
    Girls feel compelled to walk up to me at work "Oh! Did you hear waht happened to so and so? It was BAD!" Okay, so they go on and on....and I sit, and sit, then excuse myself. No response. Nada. Otherwise you jump in it too.

    That's my only advice I can give. Don't add fuel to a fire if you want it to go out.




  4. #4
    Tart
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    simple, you never tell anyone anything "personal" dont talk about your bf..husband... kids..lack there of..mom and dad...past jobs..

    NOTHING. you keep convos to work.

    If the rumors are about work, well its because they are jealous. enjoy at least it means you are popular.

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    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    totally agree with tart.. i learned my lesson when this girl at my club started talking about my boyfriend in front of my regular customer.. no more of that...

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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    If you do talk about personal stuff at work try to keep it vanilla. What I mean is that it isn't very interesting so there is no need for someone to remember the details or tell anyone else. Also, use your skills as a stripper with other strippers.... get them to do all the talking.... just as you would get a customer/patron to do all the talking.


    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    ^^ What I was going to say. Just listen, dont contribute, don't comment, don't argue. Just act like it doesn't phase you and don't prove them right.

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    God/dess anomar's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    Speak only if spoken to unless you're giving a compliment (even if you think you're offering a neutral comment, girls often can an innocent commment)... always reply 'ok' to people asking how your night is (never good or bad!). Smile at everyone. Just seem shy instead of standoffish.

    Oh yeah, hide your shit so that if girls demand to use your crap you can say you don't have it. The other night I was going onstage and some girls runs up to me in the dressing room... I NEED SPRAY! WHERE'S YOUR SPRAY? I NEED TO USE SOME SPRAY RIGHT NOW. me: um, I don't use spray. [I use perfume oil instead.] dancer: WHAT??? YOU DON'T USE SPRAY? WHY THE FUCK DON'T YOU USE SPRAY???

    Luckily I was already hopping onstage and I am sure she forgot about it very quickly.

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    God/dess virgoamm's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    Quote Originally Posted by nekosmeow
    ok quick question.
    how does a person be freindly and non-stuckup with out participating in the local rumor mill at work? ive just been raked over the coals at my club over something other people said at the sister clubs in my town about me and i dont want it to happen again. just not talking to my coworkers doesnt seem like a good opition to me.
    thanxs
    neko
    My advice would be to treat is solely as a job, not a social event or a place to make friends. If you do, great, that's just an added bonus. Go in to work, do your job, and go home. Hustle your ass off and spend as little time in the dressing room as possible. I rarely ever spend any time in there, unless I'm going in to freshen up after doing my stage set, or if I did a lot of dances and want to touch-up my makeup, put on perfume, etc....In my opinion, you should be on the floor at all times talking to customers and making as much $$ as you possibly can. On the flip side, always be friendly to the other dancers and make small talk with them-but that's just me...I have no desire whatsoever to get involved in the rumor mill, as that has problems with a capital P written all over it and can cause the issues you were talking about to happen all over again. This is a competitive and cut-throat business and brings out the worst in (some) people, and frankly, to me, it's just not worth it.

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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    how i handle it: i say nice things or nothing at all. i usually talk about stupid happy things, like eating halloween candy. seriously, what danger is eating candy going to do me? or maybe i'll talk about some new bedsheets i bought. something that is harmless and i wouldnt mind the world knowing. by saying happy things, it puts everyone in a good mood and negative drama stops.

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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    stay out on the floor, avoid the dressing room, and keep to yourself. its worked for me this far. i'm not sure if saying happy things will mke the mood better, i'd feel like shit if my day was going horrible and someone was going on about how great life is. even when i'm having the best night ever, i just stay quiet and neutral.

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    Banned jasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    I avoid the other girls when possible. I know it sounds rude, but it works. I am always polite, I just avoid the dressing room. If I have to freshen up I'm in and out, I change very quickly, and I never answer questions about how much I've made.

    I only have 1 or 2 girls I will talk to (the ones I've never heard gossip or be malicious, and only talk to them about things like, "Where did you get your shoes? There so cute!". That's the extent of my conversations. No one knew I was married & had a family when I danced. No one knew what town I lived in, where I worked (day-job), or anything else personal.

    I made the mistake of being friendly with some girls at the first club I ever worked at and the rumor mill was brutal. Anything can be twisted into some story. Learned my lesson & have been all business since.

    Jasmine

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    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    Quote Originally Posted by jasmine
    I avoid the other girls when possible. I know it sounds rude, but it works. I am always polite, I just avoid the dressing room. If I have to freshen up I'm in and out, I change very quickly, and I never answer questions about how much I've made.
    Yup, tha'ts pretty much what I learned from Mod. Pamela back when I first started dancing. I still operate the same way, and I don't have any problems with anyone. I come to work, make my money, and go home. I dont mind the occasional chit chat w/ SOME of the girls, but when 3's a crowd comes along, I politely excuse myself. I dont' have time for cliques.







    Some Douchebag: "[Pimp C] 12:43 am: its true we got to stick together the black people on SW CK you is teh condoleeza of SW"


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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    there were rumors started in my club that i was the "slut" and basically the one to go to for the "extras." I am FAR from that kind of person. we had a meeting the weekend that i heard about the rumors and after i had made a LOTTTT of money the night before. all i said was for the girls to keep spreading the rumors because its just making me more money.

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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    sorry.. forgot to put this on the end

    needless to say.. the rumors stopped in their tracks after that

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    Featured Member mina loy's Avatar
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    Default Re: rumor mills and how to avoid them?

    Quote Originally Posted by cinammonkisses
    Yup, tha'ts pretty much what I learned from Mod. Pamela back when I first started dancing. I still operate the same way, and I don't have any problems with anyone. I come to work, make my money, and go home. I dont mind the occasional chit chat w/ SOME of the girls, but when 3's a crowd comes along, I politely excuse myself. I dont' have time for cliques.

    some of the dancers at my club have sleepovers where they sleep over at each other's houses! not as in a place to crash for one night but an organized sleepover. i can't imagine the long-term consequences of such an event...

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