What's with people on the roads today? I've gotten cut off(or attempted to get cut off) more than a few times in the past few days!...And that's considering that I drive this huge, bright yellow-orange van! WTF?
Oh yeah, cutting off a big yellow VW van with your dinkbot Ford Focus is such a *great* idea...it's not like my van is much bigger than your car and more of a hazard to your car, than yours is to mine if you hit my van! Or maybe you couldn't SEE my van driving right in front of you? Maybe my car's color wasn't bright enough for you? After all, it's not like Penndot(and other road services) chose to make their street signs and road markings in the SAME SHADE OF YELLOW-ORANGE as my van, because it's more visible than say, brown or gray. Yep, maybe my car appeared invisible. Or maybe you expected my outdated, teeny 70hp engine to quickly accelerate outta the way of your cutting-off in record timing. Or maybe you expected it to have superpowered brakes. That's a likely scenario too, considering that my vintage van is from 1976 and is essentially a huge rectangular box-shaped thing on wheels! It's not like bigger heavier vehicles need extra braking time or anything like that. But why should I worry about all of this? It's not like I'm trying to keep my insurance rates down, or preserve my treasured van from getting totalled like my Mazda RX-7 did a few years ago. Go ahead, ram into my van, break your neck doing it, and then have your relatives sue me over the whole scenario. So maybe your Ford Focus should go on, and continue to jump right out in front of my van, or tell your buddy in the Honda to attempt a left-hand turn from the right-side lane right as I'm driving straight by...around one of Philly's most infamous/dangerous intersections, too! Because all of this makes just so much sense. What, are you just annoyed that one of those "damn hippie vans" is still chugging along, and for a longer time than the time it's been since your uncle last tried LSD?
Ugh can't I drive my van in peace? When I drive my superfast, supernew Mustang, people seem to get outta my way...even though it's a quicker car and less of a safety risk(smaller size) to you if you run into me. I just don't get people sometimes! My friend M--k calls idiot drivers "de-de-dees"(I think he got that from the Carlos Mencia show). Haha! Anyone have any road rage stories to share?![]()



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Grrrr!


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