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Thread: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

  1. #1
    Glamazon
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    Default My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    One of my new regular customers needs affection. Badly. He doesn't want me to dance, he just wants me to sit on his lap and hug/be hugged by him. It drives me completely insane. Besides the fact that I like to keep moving while I'm at work, I really don't like for someone to try and "connect" with me while I'm at work. I get really drained by this type of interaction--kind of like he's sapping my emotional energy. On top of it, he says really super nice things to me ("You're the most beautiful, nicest person I've ever met") and loves staring at my face and complimenting me. I just want to scream, "Okay, let me dance and OBJECTIFY ME ALREADY!!"

    I hate to say it, but I'd rather spend 10 songs fighting off a Mr. Octopus Hands customer.

  2. #2
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Does he pay well?
    I mean... you could always like put something like nasty smelling on.

    OO OO EAT A CAN OF TUNA FISH WHEN HE COMES IN....

    And let the water/oil drip on you.... So hot. And will totally repel him... or atl least you'll know it's love.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  3. #3
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    He pays me by the song, the same as anyone else does and won't spend the money for VIP...

    And speaking of smells...his breath stinks and he breathes it on me!!

  4. #4
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon
    I just want to scream, "Okay, let me dance and OBJECTIFY ME ALREADY!!"
    Brilliant!

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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon

    And speaking of smells...his breath stinks and he breathes it on me!!
    Singeing off your eyebrows and fake eye lashes. Hahaha I thought that was funny. But yes its awful when a custy or even worse a regular has bad breath. Order him a mojito or just stuff some gum in his mouth.
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    Senior Member Nightwalk's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon
    "Okay, let me dance and OBJECTIFY ME ALREADY!!"
    I think I will be the first to say, not every guy goes to the club to look at T&A all night. Like I said a post before its def not the best idea to go to the club looking for "Compassion, or Affection". I think your new guy besides like you said wanting to have a cute girl wrapped up in his arms, but he really wants to talk but is afraid of how to strike up a conversation. I'm pretty sure thats what it is , one of my friends I met at the club is just like this. He does not really want dances he just kinda wants to feel like he has a female friend to talk to. That is kinda weird how he wont go back to VIP. I love it back there, the couches are so comfy !

    Id say if you want it to somewhat stop, just be like look "I'm going to be upfront I think your sweet and all but nothing is going to happen between us and I don't want you to get attached or anything. I feel like I'm not doing my job just sitting here". Mood killer.... Maybe but at the same time I bet he comes back. One major thing I see happen way to much is someone comes in that is young ( say 18 ) or needs a lot of affection and gets it now thinks he has a connection with this girl then is heartbroken when they go home.

    I like people who are much more upfront *Including in dancers*(Maybe its just me).

    Sorry for the book. Its just my 2c on a situation like that.

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    I dunno. I kinda like these guys. They are better than my idea of a nightmare customer (i.e. The Octopus).

    I can understand it too. It's a GFE!

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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    I'd prefer the "huggers" to the "moaners". Moaners are my most hated customers. I give air dances, and they make me sound like an extras girl. *shudder*

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    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon
    One of my new regular customers needs affection. Badly. He doesn't want me to dance, he just wants me to sit on his lap and hug/be hugged by him. It drives me completely insane. Besides the fact that I like to keep moving while I'm at work, I really don't like for someone to try and "connect" with me while I'm at work. I get really drained by this type of interaction--kind of like he's sapping my emotional energy. On top of it, he says really super nice things to me ("You're the most beautiful, nicest person I've ever met") and loves staring at my face and complimenting me. I just want to scream, "Okay, let me dance and OBJECTIFY ME ALREADY!!"

    I hate to say it, but I'd rather spend 10 songs fighting off a Mr. Octopus Hands customer.

    I'll gladly take him!
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  10. #10
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    They call me... THE HUGGER! Woo Doo WooOOOoo ... Wa wa wa.

  11. #11
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    You know, it depends.
    a) I would suggest that he is already objectifying you. You're a cuddle-object instead of a sex-object (I'm being a little cute); but same thing.
    b) I would also suggest the reason it is particularly tiresome is because you feel that he is, even if it is not explicit, demanding something of you; and he is demanding it aggressively. It's not because he's objectifying you less, it is because he is doing it more. He is demanding, in a way, that you subsume yourself as a person into his conception of you as a person

    I'm sorry - was that a little out of touch with reality? Well then let's put it this way - if he had a chance he would amputate your arms and legs and keep in you in his basement until you learned to love him.
    I don't mind cuddling and chatting; I don't mind typical girlfriend experience. But when they are looking deep in your eyes and all you can see is a reflection of yourself without limbs - I'll pass.

    I didn't have this with a regular, but a one off recently. Another girl here actually said to me "It looked like you two had formed and serious and intimate relationship". I asked him, more or less, "are you normal?" I didn't phrase it, exactly like that, but that was gist, and he gave a perfectly reasonable (well, relatively reasonable. Reasonable enough that he didn't freak me out) explanation on why he acted like that. So you can just ask him. It might be fine.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

  12. #12
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny
    You know, it depends.
    a) I would suggest that he is already objectifying you. You're a cuddle-object instead of a sex-object (I'm being a little cute); but same thing.
    b) I would also suggest the reason it is particularly tiresome is because you feel that he is, even if it is not explicit, demanding something of you; and he is demanding it aggressively. It's not because he's objectifying you less, it is because he is doing it more. He is demanding, in a way, that you subsume yourself as a person into his conception of you as a person

    I'm sorry - was that a little out of touch with reality? Well then let's put it this way - if he had a chance he would amputate your arms and legs and keep in you in his basement until you learned to love him.
    I don't mind cuddling and chatting; I don't mind typical girlfriend experience. But when they are looking deep in your eyes and all you can see is a reflection of yourself without limbs - I'll pass.

    I didn't have this with a regular, but a one off recently. Another girl here actually said to me "It looked like you two had formed and serious and intimate relationship". I asked him, more or less, "are you normal?" I didn't phrase it, exactly like that, but that was gist, and he gave a perfectly reasonable (well, relatively reasonable. Reasonable enough that he didn't freak me out) explanation on why he acted like that. So you can just ask him. It might be fine.
    From a guy who likes to cuddle to someone who would keep you in a box with no arms and legs.

    Jenny, you have me giggling all night with your posts.

    OMFG... Wha!

  13. #13
    DJ Maimed
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    To Jenny; Look at the bright side... if he puts you in your oven you'll be allright!

  14. #14
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Well there is an upside to my oven problem. You know, I'm going to try to explain this concept and connection to someone tomorrow, and it's just not going to work.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

  15. #15
    Tart
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    AW So it isn't just me that this somewhat bothers me. Its like " eh okay fine hugs bitch" and then im not really trying to "cuddle". There is a fine line between nice hugs and hanging on and smothering me.

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    I kind of prefer a girl that will cuddle a bit. I tend to stick with girls that I connect with. If she sits at the bar with me and chats for a while over drinks, I usually end up spending my evening with her. Very seldom will I go with a girl who just walks up and asks me if I want a dance. (Unless she reall have a great set of boobs...I'm a "boob guy" ) I really prefer to have some kind of connection with the girl or the lap dance just isn't that great.

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    God/dess Silverback's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny
    Well then let's put it this way - if he had a chance he would amputate your arms and legs and keep in you in his basement until you learned to love him.
    Yes, nothing says "I want to chop off your limbs and store you in the basement" like a hug.

    I hope my female aquaintances (stripper and non) never catch on to my nefarious plot.
    "He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!"

  18. #18
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    ^^^
    It's not about a hug. Or even cuddling. I mean, it doesn't feel weird to, while conversing with the customer, sit on his lap (if I'm being paid. I have a strict no-cash-no-lap policy because it really ticks me off when customers touch me and then don't buy the dance) or sit with his arm around you. But it's weird and stifling when he wants you to sit close to him, repeatedly hug you tight, in between hugs looking into your eyes and saying things like "Tell me all about yourself. I want to know all about you" and then interrupting to say things like "You're so special." Trust me - if you've never experienced that, it is stifling and demanding. It's not a "Seeya later Silverback" and a kiss on the cheek.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    That's probably the toughest part of your job. Dealing with a customer that obviously isn't going to spend any money on you but wants your attention. If I only have $100.00 or so, I'll usually tell the girl up front that I only plan on doing 1 or 2 dances and having a couple drinks. I know this is your job and I don't want to waste your time if you can be making more money from another customer.

  20. #20
    God/dess RoseWhite's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Maimed
    To Jenny; Look at the bright side...
    if he puts you in your oven you'll be allright!


    It's not about a hug. Or even cuddling. I mean,
    it doesn't feel weird to, while conversing with the
    customer, sit on his lap (if I'm being paid. I have a
    strict no-cash-no-lap policy because it really ticks
    me off when customers touch me and then don't buy the
    dance) or sit with his arm around you. But it's weird
    and stifling when he wants you to sit close to him,
    repeatedly hug you tight, in between hugs looking into
    your eyes and saying things like "Tell me all about
    yourself. I want to know all about you" and then
    interrupting to say things like "You're so special."
    Well put Jenny.

    I understand what Glamazon was saying, and I
    completely get why she finds it invasive to the maxx -
    but it does at least sound like this particular
    customer is paying her - I do hope it's in amounts
    equivalent to what she'd be getting paid for the
    "Objectify Me Already!" lap dance.

    What chaps my hide is the guys who think that the
    initial approach (and I'm not talking about
    "wannadance") is an invitation to start
    hugging/pawing/squeezing me - even kissing me, with
    their big meaty hairy sweaty arm across my shoulders,
    crushing my expensive hairpiece that takes 20 minutes
    to put on - when they have ZERO intention of buying a
    dance. It's taking advantage of me. and possibly
    worse, wasting my time.

    I try to play along for awhile, since you sometimes
    can't tell who might eventually be a buyer, and I can
    be tolerant of some level of hugginess if I'm also
    allowed to do my JOB, but my bullshit detector has
    started to go off within a few songs with Huggers.
    Once I've made the pitch a few times and I'm 99% sure
    he's not buying, I've started using a line that I got
    right here on SW*. "You do know that the more you
    touch me, the more obligated you are to buy a dance,
    right?" Usually his reaction is to abruptly step back
    with his hands up and a "Whoa!" expression (oh huggy
    boys, you think you're so original, but it's utterly
    predictable) and I say "Yeah, that's what I thought!"
    :::turns to camera one, flashes big smile, gives
    thumbs-up: "Thanks, StripperWeb!":::


    *I cannot for the life of me recall the author of this
    one. It sounds like the no-nonsense voice of
    experience - maybe Bridgette or Emily? Paris? Step
    forward and take credit!
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    I would say just try to take advantage of him - make sure he give your a backrub or a footrub. Put his hands to use and maybe you won't have to pay as much attention to him. If i was in a cuddly mood, I sure as hell wouldn't mind giving a girl a backrub.

    On the breath thing - it might not hurt to bring breath mints around with you (I know, you shouldn't have to... but you are the one to suffer if the custy's breath stinks). I had a girl offer me some gum/mints (although I was already shewing some and I had already spent a fistfull of cash for her time).

    RoseWhite - I used to live in Sunny_V_ale CA... is that near Sunny_d_ale?

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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    does he look kind of like steve martin? older, well dressed, whiteish hair? i have a customer very similar who travels a lot. he wants to hug or dance ...like -real- ballroom dance the whole vip time. it's better than the extras guys, but it gets a little too clingy sometimes. :/

  23. #23
    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Glamazon-
    i love the customers but they USED to drain me liek that. try putting yoruself mentally elsewhere while he is staring at you hugging you. (for ex. i try to calculate my 15% to the house total during these times.) and imagine him as someone you enjoy hugging, so maybe you can deal better. oh, and as for the breath thing, pop some gum in front of him and hand him a piece too, say here, i grabbed you one too. but most likely it wont work since bad breath stems from the deep stomach and lack of food. good luck with this.

    Love it!

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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    Ooh, I had that...a customer who wanted me to sit on his lap and kept cooing "my sweet girl"....holy crap, it gave me the heebie jeebs. Can't handle that.

    Feature costumes for sale!

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    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: My nightmare customer: The Hugger

    I didn't have this with a regular, but a one off recently. Another girl here actually said to me "It looked like you two had formed and serious and intimate relationship". I asked him, more or less, "are you normal?" I didn't phrase it, exactly like that, but that was gist, and he gave a perfectly reasonable (well, relatively reasonable. Reasonable enough that he didn't freak me out) explanation on why he acted like that.
    Hey, was that in TBay? And was 'another girl' me?? You totally had that "I'm in love with Jenny" guy in Tbay...lots of staring adoringly at you. Jenny worked it like apro, let me tell you. It was pretty amazing, actually.

    Feature costumes for sale!

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