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Thread: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

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    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Last night I honestly came to the realization of the reason why I don't have a car. I've been dancing for a whole freaking year! I've been able to buy a car on more than a few occasions, but why wouldn't I? I would have so many excuses..

    I'll be 24 dam years old in Feb. and I've never had a drivers license..Everytime I motivate myself to get up and out and learn how to drive (my main issue is manuverability parking) I cancel plans and make up some excuse ie. I'm tired, I have class whatever.

    Life would be so much more simple if I had a car. Things would be cheaper as well. Catching cabs and the bus is time consuming, and it taxes you out the a**.

    Someone HELP me get out of this rut!!! PLEASE







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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Cin, I'll share a secret with ya. I didn't get my license till I was 23 for the same reason. And I had all my friends aiding and abetting me by driving my phobic ass around whenever I wanted (I always paid for gas).

    You need to tell this to a close friend and have them go with you. Take driving lessons, they help. Then have said friend go with you to the test, kicking your ass the whole way whenever you waver.

    If I was there, I'd do it with you just because, if not for my girl Joanne, I wouldn't have done it either. Hell, maybe I should just send Joanne! She's a real task master.

    Either way...don't ponder it. Just do it. Study for your permit and take some lessons. You'll be fine. Keep us posted.

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    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Once you take driving lessons it won't seem so weird. Also, lessons are all about practicing things (including the dreaded parallel parking maneuver) until you are good enough for taking the test.

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    There's nothing wrong with being afraid of something. Some of the drivers around here scare me...but you learn defensive driving (keeping your attention on the drivers around you at all times). I haven't had an accident since I was 17 (I'm 32 now). Its all about being aware.

    Take some driving courses!! They teach you how to manuever the car. After you get your license, you can just drive your car short distances until you get ready to drive further. Small steps make a big difference. BTW...I didn't expressway drive until I was almost 20 (I got my license at 16/17) because I was so scared...now I just jump onto the first one I can.

    Practice, practice, practice. You can do it!!

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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    As long as were confessing....

    The first time I drove a car, we each got a one hour session behind the wheel. I drove seven miles. Thats 7 MPH folks!

    I've had a license for more than 15 years, and I still have driving situations that make me cringe, although I've found the best antedote to that fear is experience behind the wheel.

    I say get to a good driving school. There should be a number of them available in your area.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

  6. #6
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I've had my license since I was 16(I NEEDED one, since I lived in a far-away town where I couldn't walk anywhere and there was no mass transit), but I hate driving too. I purposely take certain routes to avoid tricky driving situations, such as traffic circles, heavy merging, driving down narrow one-way streets, parallel parking, etc. I especially hate driving when I drive my huge VW camper van...the steering wheel is huge and it takes the strength of an army to make that thing turn!(hyperbole) I purposely park on the far side of a parking lot, so that I won't have to worry about people parking next to me or making a tight squeeze for when I pull out. I also hate bad drivers...people scare me when they cut off my van without giving me sufficient time for braking. Or, when they almost ram into my sportscar that I've invested so much money in, but won't yield much money back if it gets totalled.

    I used to be a lot less assertive than I am now, and as a result, would get suckered into giving people rides even though I really didn't want to. Sometimes this meant that these so-called "friends" would navigate me down narrow one-way alleyways, or traffic circles, or parallel parking in the middle of the city. I would freak out and curse and make a big discomforting scene, because I was a nervous driver and I was hoping that my big scene would deter them from ever wanting to ask me for a ride ever again(that's the passive aggressive approach). Instead, they just thought I was a "crazy bitch" even though I was nice enough to give a ride against my better judgment in the first place. During the year that I couldn't afford a car, I was actually HAPPY at first, because this meant that I wouldn't have to go through all the bullshit of driving...I could use the leeches for rides for a change!

    Cinnamonkisses, I think it is best for you to practice driving in a barren suburb neighborhood. A mall parking lot(with its little roads interlinking the parking lots) is a good idea...go driving on a quiet Sunday morning, when no one is there. I found that I learned to drive much easier when I had less pressure from other drivers on the road. Hells, I learned to drive stick much more efficiently when I practiced by myself, because my dad would always freak out and make me nervous when he rode with me. Do you live in the middle of a city? If so, it is probably quicker/cheaper to rely on mass transit, and maybe then you can reserve the car for long ventures into the suburbs, such as visiting family or going to the suburbs for a job interview. And when you do leave the city, try to leave at an early hour when there are not many people on the roads. Best of luck to you.

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    Featured Member Glamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Well ive actually got my drivin test tomorrow morning, i failed my first as i got nervous during my sharp corner reverse and fucked it up so hopefully i wont sweat it tomorrow

    im 22 and have never been able to really afford driving lessons before until the summer of this year when i started takin my lessons.
    I was terrified but honestly if u have a good instructor( i have a woman and i feel i wouldve been too nervous with a guy) then they should put u at ease.
    A Good Girl With Bad Intentions

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    Senior Member Ivory0211's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I finally broke down and got my license 1 month before I turned 23. I did the exact thing you do, making up excuse after excuse why I couldn't go for my test. I had to though - I had just given birth to my second child 5 months before. What would I have done in an emergency? I couldn't NOT have a car with two kids to take care of ! It was a nuisance to bother family and friends to take them to doctor appontments, etc.. constantly. I go days without driving my car. I would rather not if I didn't have to, but I know it's there and I'm legal if I need it.

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    God/dess leilanicandy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Quote Originally Posted by VenusGoddess View Post
    (I'm 32 now).
    Wow Venus in your picture. You dont look 32. You look good for your age.

    Quote Originally Posted by cinammonkisses View Post

    Life would be so much more simple if I had a car. Things would be cheaper as well. Catching cabs and the bus is time consuming, and it taxes you out the a**.

    Someone HELP me get out of this rut!!! PLEASE
    Cinammon fear is only in your mind. You can conquor anything you choose to! By putting your mind to it! Take charge and say I refuse to live like this! Why waste your money when you can save by climbing over this stumbling block.

    Quote Originally Posted by DylanAngel View Post

    You need to tell this to a close friend and have them go with you. Take driving lessons, they help. Then have said friend go with you to the test, kicking your ass the whole way whenever you waver.

    This might not be a bad idea. To help you get thru this
    Last edited by leilanicandy; 11-28-2006 at 07:47 PM.
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  10. #10
    mermaidnz
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    im the same. at 22 i refuse to get behind the wheel. i just know it will end in tragedy for someone. another female driver on the road...lol..no wya. im saving lives this way!!

    anyways. driving cars:thats what boys are for

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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I just got my license, and my life has changed drastically since doing so. I had trained for driving in ohio, for the ohio test, but when I moved to michigan I needed to get my licence, so I signed up to take the test. I passed the manuverability, no prob. I even parralel parked wich I had never even attempted to do before(not on the ohio test). I ended up failing my first round because I went 5 miles over the limit 3 times. ALL you have to do is drive around some cones, and show them you can park! It's not so bad!
    Once you get out there, you get over the fear, and driving becomes as habitual as walking. You can walk and probably run in stripper shoes, that is by FAR harder than driving is! To be forewarned, driving is like stripping, very addicting... and hard to stop once you start
    Next time you ride around, look at all the retarded people out their driving, if they can get their license, then why cant a smart woman like yourself get one?
    Good luck, you can do it!

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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    ok now i don't feel so bad. i'll be 23 in april. i learned how to drive before i left hawaii 3 years ago & never got my license before i left because i moved to las vegas right after that. i've gone the entire time without a license or a car. i get sick and tired of catching the bus all over this damn city. i failed my first test last december because i had just bought a truck and was still trying to get used to it. i failed my second test this past june. my driving improved, however the bitch failed me on my parallel parking becuse i let my right back tire take the curb as i was backing in(damn). mind you, this truck had some big ass monster truck tires so that was another contributing factor. so i'm taking my test again for the 3rd time on dec.11th so pray for me. if i pass this'll be the best christmas gift ever.

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    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I learned to drive when I was 11- on a farm, I put an old international pickup truck in a tree.. YES folks.. IN A TREE... old 40's pickups climb very well.. I'll never forget my grandfather's face when my sister ran to the house to tell him that I had the truck in the tree... over a river... I was terrified...

    I got my license at 14.. back in 1985- daylight only until 16.. (farming states... back in the day allowed you to get your license pre-pubescent)... the first winter.. yeah, ran my grandmother's oldsmobile into the barrow pit... didn't drive for two years... then one day my dad called me on the phone and said that no one else could help him and I absolutely HAD to drive and get him from a job site that was way up in the friggin boonies, windy road the whole works, throught the trees... when I got there, he had had someone drive him to the small little town to call me, and then drive him back... there were all these people he was working with that could take him home including the guy he rode with that morning,but he knew that unless there was a reason for me to drive I wasn't going to do it...

    I did it... and I drove all the time after that... you'll find your comfort zone... plus, you're much older than I was when I was driving the first time... LOL... you will have less anxiety and frightful experiences..


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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Oh boy, life sucks if you can't drive in Texas, especially a sprawl city like Houston.

    Yeah, I used to have ppl use me to drive them around. Now I just get so drunk that no one even asks. Hahaha, j/k.

    Driving CAN be scary, I sometimes get major anxiety in the rain. My first car spun out a lot.

    Mind over matter baby, you can do it!

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  15. #15
    Sitri
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    ha ha Gynger. Farm driving is the best. I was in 8th grade and driving a corn truck with an unsynchronized 5 speed transmission.. can you double clutch?

    Anyway, not only did I have to drive, I damn well better not lose any corn driving over the railroad tracks or hitting a bump.

    I remember in 6th grade a friend of mine had a paper route and we would get up at 5 in the morning and push the family car into the alley so they couldn't hear it start. The we would drive around and deliver the papers instead of walking our asses off.

    Ah, the good old days.

    Anyway no anxiety here.. unless the wifey is driving. She scares the shit out of me.

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    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I can drive a car, motorcycle and tractor trailer. I am a very conservative driver. I have had anxiety attacks. But I'm sending you the gift over the wires. ( minus the anxiety) If I can do it I have faith you can to. Take the lessons. Well worth it! Let us know how you make out.

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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Me too, scared of driving! I'm 27, no license (though I've taken lessons, and tried the road test once).

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    Featured Member Glamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Ok so i just failed my test for the SECOND time! Im so gutted cos everything was doin soo good before all my manouevers were great and everything....so we go onto the motorway to drive back to the test centre and theres a lot of traffic jams on there because of bloody roadworks! so i go round this roundabout to turn off and there are like 30 cars all blockin my exit so im signallin and then they start movin and there is a gap for me so i drive through and some asshole decides to speed up and go around me so he is now in front of me so i have to break and my examiner has to slam the breaks too and grrrrr that impatient asshole lost me my test!!
    A Good Girl With Bad Intentions

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    Veteran Member pipermarau's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I got my first car out of necessity. i was in colorado and i wanted to move back to texas so i bought a car and my dad drove up from new mexico to let me use his truck for my driving test. i had been to classes before but i had never taken the test. i'm still scared of driving a little. what i had to do was figure out what was sccaring me so much and what it will take to get over that fear. my fear was the other people on the road. my boyfriend told me to put it all behind me so that is what i do now. i put the other people on the road behind me. if i feel worried about a car infront of me i pass them the first good chance i get and it relieves my fear. i do my best to obey the speed limit and i always know what is going on outside my car at all times. if you sit higher up in your vehicle you can see through the windshield of the cars infront of you so you can see when there might be an accidentand i always check behind me for people bobing and weaving so i stay out of their way. the best part about driving for me is that i'm only up at night when other people are asleep so i don't have to worry about other dirvers that much. if i could handle driving my car from colorado to dallas just two weeks after my getting my liscence you can handle just getting around inner city for a while. just ask your self what it is that you are so afraid of and the easiest way to conquer your fear.

    good luck!

  20. #20
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    Well I hate driving, and given that Living in Melbourne Australia for a good chunk of my life, I did not have to do it. Although I always kept in my mind that if/when I went stateside I would have to do it. I also knew as I grew older I would have commitments that require me to be able to be drive.

    I learnt, I overcame, and I had a hell of a lot of lessons. I had lessons in CT, NZ and Melbourne. I was confident enough I did not need them, once I got used to being on the opposite side of the road in Florida. I was right, but it was also the easiest driving test I've taken. It made my Melbourne one look like a nightmare.

    Personally I still don't like it, I don't think I ever will, but it does not stress me out as much as it once did. I've found Sunday mornings are a great time to get out and drive. Also if you go certain places frequently, try going to them first. I know a certain boring mall near where I used to live, that was a great practice run, multiple speed roads, mildly rude drivers, and I knew the roads well. I was stressed out from driving I could go to the mall and grab a frozen coke to cool off.
    One more cup of coffee for the road,
    One more cup of coffee 'fore I go
    To the valley below....

    Slowly moseying my way to the exit.
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  21. #21
    Veteran Member Scout's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll admit: I'm AFRAID of driving..

    I hate driving. Once I almost ran over elementary school children crossing the street. It hasn't been the same since. I only drive when I have to and make minimal trips as possible. Needless to say, I fill my tank about once a month. That's how little I drive.

    This is far fetched but you could move to a city that has great public transportation like Chicago, NYC, or Portland. Yep, Portland. I almost moved to Portland just for the fact that I wouldn't need a car.

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