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Thread: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Am I just a sentimentel slob or what but I keep finding myself feeling sorry for some of the dancers I meet in the clubs. Most of them are making 2 or 3 times the money I do but after talking with some of them, I realize that they shouldn't be in this business. Some are single moms who only seem to be working the club because they can't make this kind of cash anywhere else. (I'm actually in the same position myself....hate my job with a passion but it pays too good to quit.)
    I even ran into one slightly overweight mom who is stuck working ths day shift. I know for a fact that she hooks on the side to help with her income. She shouldn't have to do this. Lately I've been feeling really bad about one of the main girls I hang out with. I've known her for about 6 months and I now realize that the main reason she works the club is because she's lonely and craves the attention. She works 5, 6 and sometime 7 days a week. She admits she hates to stay home alone so she goes out constantly. She drinks quite a bit every night I see her at the club. This really bums me out sometimes, which relates back to the thread "Do you ever get depressed at strip clubs.) Do any of you other guys run into this?

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    I certainly feel for anyone who is in a monetary tight spot and can't afford to move onto another profession that will make ends meet, but look at it this way, there's a lot of women in the world in such situations for whom being a stripper is not an option. I feel a lot more for them.

    Really the best course of action for a dancer to take is to earn as much money as she needs to get herself out of her hole and keep herself there by investing her earnings towards getting some sort of degree or certification that will give her options to having a sustainable career long after her hotness has waned.

    And while I see a lot of dancers instead squander the opportunity those earnings could provide on petty frivolities, it should be noted the seed that leads to such behavior often was planted long before such women became dancers (or involved in other types of sex work). Being in a profession where there is lots of money to be made, but little in the way of formal discipline on how to manage it merely magnifies this flaw. Its not just dancers who do this. Look at some of our professional athletes, musicians, and Hollywood types. Very much the same thing.

    Truthfully, there is little I can do to rectify such situations, so there's little need to feel sorry for people in them. Besides, I don't think the ladies want our patronizing pity anyways. I'd rather respect and treat them as mature adults who can make their own decisions, even if they have a track record of not making wise ones. We might as well enjoy what they provide us in the meantime.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    No. They make more money than I do...or potentially can.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    If this is your experience at strip clubs why, in the name of god, do you like to go?
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    DJ Maimed
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Check mouth for hook.

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny View Post
    If this is your experience at strip clubs why, in the name of god, do you like to go?
    It doesn't happen all the time, just occasionally. A lot of guys tend to forget dancers are people too. They don't realize that you girls have your own problems and issues to deal with.Besides, if a girl is willing to hang out with me when I don't have a lot of bucks to drop, she must REALLY be lonely. I just figure it's my job to try and cheer her up a bit.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    ^^^
    Hey, I'd be the last person to say that dancers aren't people and shouldn't be treated as such.
    But there is some space between courtesy, politeness even some degree of empathy and the experience you describe. I mean - it just doesn't sound fun.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR View Post
    No. They make more money than I do...or potentially can.

    FBR
    Potentially is a long shot FBR. You are a legitimate business owner. You probably make 5X the amount most dancers do. Not all girls are ambitious like Miss D. Its just too easy to be lazy in the industry, and barely get by.

    Certainly strippers can make more money than you in a given night, or in a week. But few strippers I've known can pull off the major hustle is requires to hit 6 figures. And even if they do at some point, its very inconsistent and short-lived. Seriously, I'm a hard worker, always hustling, and I couldn't keep up with the momentum. Currently, I work 70 hours a week and make the same amount of $$. Sure, it takes me 2 weeks to get paid versus that night, but you really have to be part of the dynamic to understand how draining it is. Not that its a reason to cry over poor Trixie over there with her head slumped in her triple D's.

    I don't feel sorry for strippers, there are just sad sorry people all over the place.......

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Kat, your comment reminds me of a conversation I had with Miss D several months ago. I dont know how we got on the subject of income but she told me she makes, on average, about $150K a year. Me, being me, did the math in my head. I know I give her (and shes worth every nickle of it ) around $40K a year. I know she gets about the same amount as a stipend from the university. So thats $80K. Whats up with the the $70K shortfall? Either shes very bad at math or shes doing a lot more private parties than Im aware of. But I do think she is fairly typical of someone who is in the cash business, doesnt bother to keep records (why should she?) and therefore has no idea how much she makes. Most of us strapped to W2's know and are pissed off about how little we actually walk away with after paying Uncle Sugar and all his minions.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    FBR, I finally had the balls to deposit my tax refund this year (yes, I paid estimated ahead of time, don't crucify me Dyada Sam). But still, its far less apparant when you are on a cash basis vs accrual basis.

    Oh, and if I havn't already mentioned it FBR. Yes, she is seeing other guys OTC. There is no doubt in my mind, not even a little...sorry. Its ok, she's worth it, right?

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    its nice that you care in that way but from my perspective i dont like it when customers say things like i am too good to do this job, im better than this job etc. im an adult and i can decide what i will and wont do. one customer asked me what it would take to get me to stop dancing - as in how much. this is an example of a customer totally misunderstanding the whole thing: its mostly the money but its also the freedom, the flexibility of when i work etc.

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Kat yes I know you have mentioned it before. And it really pisses me off But from you I will accept as a probability. One has to wonder why she would spill the beans though. Does she think Im a PL? Or maybe just bad at math? Now Im starting to doubt myself and wonder if those RR MPOPS were somehow faked.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR View Post
    Kat yes I know you have mentioned it before. And it really pisses me off But from you I will accept as a probability. One has to wonder why she would spill the beans though. Does she think Im a PL? Or maybe just bad at math? Now Im starting to doubt myself and wonder if those RR MPOPS were somehow faked.

    FBR
    Ah, typical man. We're smarter than you think. Its easy for her to lie about other OTC. You are obviously a skilled, er, linguist. Why bother faking it if its good and real.

    Or, let me put it this way. If she's gonna fake it, she'll fake one. If its 4, she's probably enjoying herself. Hell, a person's got to enjoy their line of work sometime!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    Or, let me put it this way. If she's gonna fake it, she'll fake one. If its 4, she's probably enjoying herself. Hell, a person's got to enjoy their line of work sometime!
    Well, actually it was five. But whos counting...except me

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    ^ Oh, you know that we all count.

    But what "counts' is never verbal or guttural or screaming in any way -- it's constriction or flushing or squirting or lashing or sweating or the eyes rolling back in a way that's actually kinda scary when the irises just totally disappear and she is pushing against your mouth so hard that you can't breathe because your tongue has never stopped for 30 solid minutes, not for one single second, for even a split second, and she is gone, so totally gone that you have scars and wetness and screaming and collapse and laughter and thank God at the end of the night, room service, that brings hot soup and chilled water and Dom and flowers and the promise of morning mimosas with warm bathrobes and sunlight and....the shower head with 10 different settings.

    Yeah, ok so I digress. Sorry.

    If the OP is in the same position as dancers -- earning money that is far too good to quit -- it makes no sense at all to feel sorry for them. Take a step back and consider the possibility that dancing and the related cash is not discouraging but empowering.

    Besides, the "Do you ever get depressed at strip clubs" thread had nothing at all to do with dancers -- it had to do with guys who really don't feel that they get any enjoyment out of the clubs anymore because of their own conflicts, neuroses, doubts or feeling entirely out of place.

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    Veteran Member absolutbliss's Avatar
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    Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Eh, I hate to be the really harsh one/negative one, but IMO dancers are adults. *hopefully!!!* We make the decision to do what we do, and put up with what we have to put up with.

    It's not an easy job, and if people are finding they consistently hate their job or can't put up with it, or can't put up with the stigma and situational dificulties that come with it, it's time to hang up the thong.

    So feel sorry for them? No. There are a million women and men who are single with children, have bad medical circumstances, etc. It seems like you'd have to feel sorry for people in those kind of situations accross the board, not just in our proffession.

    Gotta learn to roll with the punches, and take the good with the bad. (oh shit! and I just got done reading the sayings that people hate, and I probably used 'em! sorry! lol)

    Ok, I'm done.

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    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by The Other Owner View Post
    But what "counts' is never verbal or guttural or screaming in any way -- it's constriction or flushing or squirting or lashing or sweating or the eyes rolling back in a way that's actually kinda scary when the irises just totally disappear and she is pushing against your mouth so hard that you can't breathe because your tongue has never stopped for 30 solid minutes, not for one single second, for even a split second, and she is gone, so totally gone that you have scars and wetness and screaming and collapse and laughter and thank God at the end of the night, room service, that brings hot soup and chilled water and Dom and flowers and the promise of morning mimosas with warm bathrobes and sunlight and....the shower head with 10 different settings.

    Yeah, ok so I digress. Sorry.
    TOO, have you ever considered writing erotica?

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    DJ Maimed
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Try going to a Celibate Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting, room 68 next to door to Non-Alcoholics Anonymous.

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    I have never felt sorry for a strippers predicament in life. I don't really pay attention when they tell me. I do feel sorry for a stripper, who is more than attractive enough to be a stripper, is putting on a reasonable stage show (not just talking to the DJ), and is not getting tipped. I will disregard my personal feelings about her looks and toss a buck or two her way.

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by lunchbox View Post
    I have never felt sorry for a strippers predicament in life. I don't really pay attention when they tell me. .
    None of the girls have actually come out and complained about their life. It's just things I've picked up from talking to some of them over time. And occasionally, I'll see a girl that might have a few extre pounds on her, trying to get some dances going without any luck. If she comes up to me and asks me for a dance I'll sometimes say ok, just to help her out. It just kind of bums me out to see anyone working hard to get ahead and not getting anywhere. I'm sure most of the girls must get really frustrated on a really slow night when they can't scare up a dance.We're all just trying to make a living.

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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    ok, i'll be the one.

    i really wish girls weren't telling you all of this, since i think it's not professional. however, i do feel bad for a lot of them. i *like many girls mentioned* would not be doing this if i could find a job that paid what i need to get by while i go to school full time... and i don't even have kids. i enjoy my job and i have fun sometimes, but the bad experiences i've had aren't worth all of the good times. they weigh much heavier on me. i'm not saying all girls wish they could stop dancing, i know a lot of girls on here say they love it. however, i've met hundreds of girls and i'd say 75% of them would quit if they could find a job that would pay their bills.



    i taught for a few years (working 50-60 hours most of the time) and i can tell you that i have NEVER made less than i made with the school district. i could barely put the gas money in my car to get to work every day. there's no way i could have gone back to school and stayed at my old job, since i could barely pay the bills as it was. i am very frustrated when people tell me "you could quit dancing" or "you could live off a regular job".

    no. no i couldn't... and i think that says something about our country.

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    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    ^^^Preach, Penny!! Can I get a witness?
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    I only feel sorry for the dancers that have no business--for whatever reason--being a dancer.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Featured Member lopaw's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    The only thing I feel sorry for in a SC is my overworked wallet.

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    Senior Member CheetahTim's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do You Ever Feel Sorry For Dancers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Pretty_Penny View Post
    ok, i'll be the one.

    i really wish girls weren't telling you all of this, since i think it's not professional. however, i do feel bad for a lot of them. i *like many girls mentioned* would not be doing this if i could find a job that paid what i need to get by while i go to school full time... and i don't even have kids. i enjoy my job and i have fun sometimes, but the bad experiences i've had aren't worth all of the good times. they weigh much heavier on me. i'm not saying all girls wish they could stop dancing, i know a lot of girls on here say they love it. however, i've met hundreds of girls and i'd say 75% of them would quit if they could find a job that would pay their bills.
    I guess this is kind of the point I was trying to make. None of the girls have really told me outright, I'm just pretty good at reading between the lines. A lot of guys seem to think that all you dancers are just using us and raking in more money than you know what to do with. I've spent quite a few slow weeknights in the clubs and I've seen some of the best girls in the joint struggling to make a buck. It really seems like a tough business. I hate my job but I probably don't have to put up with half the crap a dancer does.

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