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Thread: Money Changes You?

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    Member Chipmunkcheeks66's Avatar
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    Default Money Changes You?

    So, I had my first audition last night, and despite being a minority (most of the girls are very petite and tiny, I'm very tall and curvy) I did get the job. Yay me!

    But a comment that was made to my boyfriend about me becoming a dancer that kinda was confusing. His sister (whose best friend bartends there) made a comment to him that it wasn't a good idea for me or for us to be dating becaue "that kind of money changes people". Do you guys think that this is true? I don't know what to think, I mean I don't think that it will change who I am but it's tough to say without actaully doing the job.

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Most dancers are not making incredible money. Even if you are making good money (like $100,000 a year) it still is not crazy money. Think about it, $100,000 a year in NYC is barely existing. I'd say that is close to the top earning potential for a dancer who isn't moving into the porn industry or doing OTC escorting.

    The money has changed me. Now I have a nice nest egg, a retirement account, health insurance, a reliable car, I am buying my home, I have the money to afford not just the basics but some extras too. I get to travel to visit my friends and family. I have money to donate to charity. I have enough money to help out friends and family in need. I am not a burden on anyone anymore.

    Where you run into trouble is if your BF/husband has no ambition or plans to become a higher earner than he currently is. It can be very emascaluating to a man to be dependant on his wife/ gf for money and lifestyle. I think that is what your friend was referring to, is that you should be matched in income and/or ambition level to have a successful relationship.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Veteran Member badpixie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    I do think that money changes people, but it's not necessarily a bad thing.

    Money has made me more responsible, more independent, and more ambitious. I feel more generous, also, because I can use what's left over after savings deposits, bills, groceries, etc to buy nice, thoughtful gifts for people, and I can give to charities and causes I believe in.

    I'm also more careful with my money than I used to be (I would spend it as soon as I made it before I became a dancer). Nothing makes you see the value of a dollar until you have to bend, twist, shake, jiggle, climb, crawl, swing, smile, and grind for every one you make!

  4. #4
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Dancing in general can change people often.

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    if by changing, you mean not stressing about it and splurging a little, yeah, it's changed me.

    But I've seen it change people for the worst, especially younger girls. That kind of money is a blessing and younger girls don't really get it unless they've lived on their own, barely scraping by.

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    Featured Member mina loy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    the one thing i make sure to watch out for is when i start thinking that $200/night is not good money. sure, it's not great money in the dancing world but compared to minimum wage jobs it's awesome money.

    i always am thankful for what i take home each night because i know that most people aren't paid as well as i am--on a worldwide scale.

  7. #7
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    as long as you are smart about it (a.k.a. SAVE MONEY!), I doubt it will change you in any negative way. The only way it changed me was by allowing me to go to school and leave an abusive home life, and by giving me the confidence and peace that comes from knowing I can support myself.

    I'm actually not happy if I leave work with $200, but I see it more as a "why didn't I puch myself more, hustle better, work harder tonight?" rather than a "$200 is crap!" thing. I'm not happy with $200 only because I know there is the potential to make a lot more, and I like to challenge myself!

    Why is your BF's sister tyring to put ideas in your heads that you should break up? And over something as simple as a job? she sounds like my ex's best friend, when he decided that I was taking up too much of my ex's time and affection and he needed to get rid of me. maybe she should worry about her own life and stop trying to stir up shit in your relationship? Not to mention that it's ridiculous of her to just assume that money is going to change you in a negative way.

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    Member Chipmunkcheeks66's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    Why is your BF's sister tyring to put ideas in your heads that you should break up? And over something as simple as a job? she sounds like my ex's best friend, when he decided that I was taking up too much of my ex's time and affection and he needed to get rid of me. maybe she should worry about her own life and stop trying to stir up shit in your relationship? Not to mention that it's ridiculous of her to just assume that money is going to change you in a negative way.
    I really don't know why she's doing that. I know she used to work in a club a long time ago, and sure she might have seen people change, but I know that doesn't happen to everyone.

    I'm *hoping* that I'm more realistic with the fact that I will hopefully be making more money. I know I need to do something so I can pay for the rest of my schooling.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Heh, the only change I've seen is things I normally considered a big purchase are now things I can do weekly (such as nice dinners with my s.o.).

    So it's a nice change.


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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    It can change you for the bad or it could change you for the worse. Its all up to you. You can earn more money for a new drug habit or get yourself through school or retire from stripping and the workforce completely. For instance some people have bad spending habits and making more money to throw away makes it worse or someone else wants to buy a house and the money helps her do that.

    Really, its all about how you want it to change you.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



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    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    yea, i'd agree with corsica, dancing changes people. when you stay true to yourself and remember that you are MORE than the job, you will be fine. and mo' money is not mo' problems like them rappers be sayin.

    Love it!

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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Quote Originally Posted by Paris View Post
    I think that is what your friend was referring to, is that you should be matched in income and/or ambition level to have a successful relationship.
    Wouldn't that mean that the money has caused you to change your financial requirements in a partner?

    That's a pretty big change.

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    ^^^ paying out 30-40-50% of your earnings in taxes has a way of 'changing' your outlook too !

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Remember that silly movie...The player's club? The stripper motto in the movie was "make that money, dont let it make you". Even though that movie is fucking stupid, its good advice, IMO.

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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    haha.. "Make that money girl, don't let it make you" is what my good friend said to me once I started dancing. Half-joking, half-serious!

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Haha, of all the things that dancing can and will change about you.... the money doesn't factor in so much. Maybe that it's EASY money... Tell her that yes... It's much better to continue making what you are now and not try to do any better... What a dumb thing to say.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    no kidding...I am super-responsible about any money I make dancing.

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Hahaha, I was doing a thing last week and I got a message on my phone and yelled out, "What the fuck?! Waitressing for $40.. is she nuts? There's no WAY I'd do that!!"

    And everyone looked at me VERY funny. "$40 is bad?"

    Yes... it is when your lowest for topless waitressing is $50....

    I was looked at like I was a psychopath for a week.

    But shit, that's an extra $10 an hour... you'd be pissed too.


    Look like a woman
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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Quote Originally Posted by CorsicaFire View Post
    Dancing in general can change people often.
    Almost every single newbie I have ever worked with has changed--usually in a very major way--after dancing for a month or two. Sometimes the difference after 6 months is astounding. It's not always a good change, either.

    And Emily is quite correct when she says that younger dancers are more vulnerable.

    I think it really depends on the mental level and life experienceof the new dancer.

    If they are insecure, the overwhelming attention they get can be addictive, and destructive to the development of real security (independent of the horny, desperate guys lining up to kiss their ass, lol).

    If there is any tendency towards substance abuse, lookout! This may be more true in the clubs I worked in in Daytona--my present club is extremely strict so we haven't had much trouble at all. But I have seen some nasty shit in Daytona, and many lives ruined.

    There is also a very nasty tendency in the business for the manipulation of others--this applies to dancers, customers, managers, DJs, bouncers--almost everyone in any aspect of the business. If someone is prone to manipulation, or being a con artist, there is tremendous potential for negative consequences.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
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    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    i think the dancing will change you more than the money will.

    but for the most part, you'll probably change for the positive.

    good things that have changed about me:
    1) I take no shit. I used to let other people control me but now I am in control of myself.
    2) I know I can get what I want if I put my mind to it.
    3) Shit, all these guys thing I'm sexy? I have a lot more confidence.
    4) Talking and dealing with all these customers and different kinds of people really helps your people skills and you can apply all that shit to every day situations.
    5)I can not only save for college, but indulge in some pleasures in the meantime (nice perfume, some nicer clothes) and not have to worry about barely scraping by.
    6)I've learned if someone can't accept me for who I am, they're not worth it. No one can change me. I should be loved for who I am.
    7) it can be a risky job - you become a lot more alert to situations and potential dangers around you. you can acess a bad situation from a far. if someone were to try following me home, i'd know in about 5 minutes. this goes for shady customers who could potentially hurt me. again, applies in every day situations. your instrinct get a lot sharper.

    bad changes
    1) i see my friends and family less often because i have such a ridiculous schedule. up all night, sleep all day.
    2) i have to constantly deal with stripper stereotypes and being told "oh you're so much smarter than that"
    3) friends may be jealous of your money - just don't flaunt it.
    4) you will be looked at differently by many people, especially men. it may be hard to find a good man to date.


    see what i'm saying? i think the positives definately outweigh the negatives.

    enough money can't change genuinely good people. there are plenty of celebrities making millions that still spend time with charity or doing something good for the world (oprah, angelina jolie...). besides, strippers aren't exactly making millions.

    just don't let money consume you and you will be happy.

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    That's some great advice, Manchester.

    I think it all boils down to power, how you deal with yours and that of others, who will attempt to control you. To succeed, you must learn to become a woman of power, and the hell with anyone who can't deal with that...
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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  22. #22
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Quote Originally Posted by manchester View Post
    i think the dancing will change you more than the money will.

    but for the most part, you'll probably change for the positive.

    good things that have changed about me:
    1) I take no shit. I used to let other people control me but now I am in control of myself.
    2) I know I can get what I want if I put my mind to it.
    3) Shit, all these guys thing I'm sexy? I have a lot more confidence.
    4) Talking and dealing with all these customers and different kinds of people really helps your people skills and you can apply all that shit to every day situations.
    5)I can not only save for college, but indulge in some pleasures in the meantime (nice perfume, some nicer clothes) and not have to worry about barely scraping by.
    6)I've learned if someone can't accept me for who I am, they're not worth it. No one can change me. I should be loved for who I am.
    7) it can be a risky job - you become a lot more alert to situations and potential dangers around you. you can acess a bad situation from a far. if someone were to try following me home, i'd know in about 5 minutes. this goes for shady customers who could potentially hurt me. again, applies in every day situations. your instrinct get a lot sharper.

    bad changes
    1) i see my friends and family less often because i have such a ridiculous schedule. up all night, sleep all day.
    2) i have to constantly deal with stripper stereotypes and being told "oh you're so much smarter than that"
    3) friends may be jealous of your money - just don't flaunt it.
    4) you will be looked at differently by many people, especially men. it may be hard to find a good man to date.


    see what i'm saying? i think the positives definately outweigh the negatives.

    enough money can't change genuinely good people. there are plenty of celebrities making millions that still spend time with charity or doing something good for the world (oprah, angelina jolie...). besides, strippers aren't exactly making millions.

    just don't let money consume you and you will be happy.
    I agree with some of the things said by Manchester. And I also agree that I changed drastically in the first 6months, as Djoser said. But I think most of you will agree that my personal "change" was 95% positive. First, it dragged me out of a horrible financial state. I was finally able to move out on my own, eat 3 square meals a day, pay off debt and finish college, get a car(or a few) again, etc. I overall became a happier and healthier person because of this...by a long shot! As much as the rappers say "mo' money mo' problems"...well, NO money = even MO' problems. I really do agree with my one friend who once theorized that not having enough money to survive on, can actually be more psychologically destructive than having too much.

    When I first started dancing, I was very timid and shy. Partly because I was very new to the stripping industry and it was something that five years ago, I woulda never ever imagined that I'd be pushed(due to money problems) to get into. I was also timid because I was a very insecure and unconfident person due to money problems. I was used to people ridiculing me for working high-schoolish min wage jobs(trust me, I WANTED better and tried!) or for driving a "ghetto" car or for being poor. So I kept quiet and to myself when I first started dancing, because the last thing that I wanted was to air my personal problems and possibly get ridiculed by these gorgeous money-comfortable strippers. Over time, I started to become more confidence and in return, talk more and become more social. This also helped my money, too.

    Some of the bad things? Well...sometimes I would brag to my friends a little too much about how much I "changed"(appearance-wise from plastic surgery, cars, college degree, my nice apartment, etc). I do not blame dancing for this. The reason why I would brag so much, was because it was a shocking dream-come-true for me to go from not making enough money for food alone, to being independent and having a few of the "want" items that I'd wanted for years but never had the opportunity to buy. If I'd started dancing after making say, $25K/yr income, yeah I woulda been making lots more money dancing but the change in lifestyle wouldn't be as drastic as going from say, $5,000/yr to lots more. Another bad thing that I tend to do, is bash who I was as a person a few years ago. I've also been spending more money on nice things(Christmas decorations, cars, etc) than I should be if I want to form a good savings cushion. I need to save more than I do! I'm not the worst spender by any means, but there's always room for improvement and I spend more than I used to on nice stuff.

  23. #23
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Money SHOULD change your life, i.e. donating to a fav. charity or nice presents for loved ones as well as buying what you love for YOU. Also invest, invest invest!!!

    It's when money takes a nice lady (or man) and changes that person into a person who thinks they are better than the rest. Example, the car, the home and throwing this in others faces. That's when money can be a bad thing.

    Bank, invest and be you. It wont change you. And if it does other will be quick to let you know. Old friends will go away, and new friends will come along.

    Seems to be a lesson i learned. And got the hell over real quick.

    I make money to survive, not to show off. It WONT last if you throw it around...Greed breeds Greed.

  24. #24
    Veteran Member BeBe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Thanks Manchester for such an informative response. I would have to agree with most or all of what you said.

    Money can be the root of all evil, but only to those who let it. For me, I'm the same diva from around the way, but I do sleep a hell of alot more than I used to. It's important that I have a quiet escape from the drama at the club. Mentally and physically preparing myself for a typical work day goes far beyond the sleep, eat, and shower routine.

    I'm not changed by my income and as long as I continue to grow and do better things with my life whose to say that I'm not utilizing my full potential. I get tired of the naysayers, but am confident that I am doing what is necessary for me to get where I need to be.

  25. #25
    Featured Member short skirts's Avatar
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    Default Re: Money Changes You?

    Money doesn't change a person, it's what a person does with the money that changes him/her.

    many gals make the mistake of not saving because they have the disillusion that the money will always be there tomorrow............

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