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Thread: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    I am so sick of the bullshit that people attribute to dancing...

    Heres the deal. I go out with friends, we meet up with some of their friends whom I dont really know to well, and they spend half the night talking to me about dancing. If it were girls I could understamd, I think most girls who dont dance are naturally curious about it...But I am talking about guys. They will ask me all these retarded questions and then expect me to act all "girls gone wild", its just like the B.S. that I have to deal with at work. They think I am going to get all drunk and start dancing on the bar or give lapdances in the living room, snorting coke off of fake tits and making out with any other drunk girl in the vicinity. I AM SICK OF THE STEREOTYPES! I am THE most boring person in the world. IN THE WORLD!!! I do nothing in my free time besides watch tv and play online, lay around with my cats and play with my ferrets. On the rare occasion I do go out with friends, I feel like I have to go out with other dancers or I will be getting accosted all night by drunk men who think I am going to act or be certain way because I am a dancer. What sucks even more is that usually when I go out, if someone I dont know asks me what I do for a job I tell them I am a hostess or a waitress just so they wont be "on" me all night expecting somethng or thinking I am a easy piece of ass! I am by no means ashamed of what I do, but I also dont go around bragging about it strange men because I dont like the kind of attention I get from it.

    Second part of the rant.

    I have lost a couple close friends due to the fact that I started dancing, and they didnt "morally" agree with it...most of them are hypocrites themselves in their own little ways but thats another story. I want to know this. I had one friend named Jessica that I had been best buds with since we were 14 and we hung out all the time even after high school...every weekend we hung out, kicked back with some beers and got drunk and had a good time. I started dancing and I knew she didnt agree with it but it was my life not hers so we let it rest. Then one night she got drunk and preoceeded to tell me that she doesnt really feel like we can be friends anymore because of my dancing...WTF?!?! She says I am "too smart to be taking my clothes off for a living" she says I am wasting my life, and I am a dissapointment because she expected more out of me. She says since she graduated from college, got married and is planning a life and family that we arent going to have anything in common anymore and there is no point in continueing our friendship. Um, excuse me? We still had all the same things in common! Before I started dancing I was a troubleshooter for the Domino's Pizza company...um, so when I worked at Domino's we have things in common but when I am dancing we all of a sudden lost everything? NO. Just a bullshit excuse. So what the fuck? Why is it that I am suddenly having to defend myself to people I have know for 5-8 years just because I am a stripper? I have to convince you that I am not any different now that I am not flipping pizza's? Why should I have to do that? All my other friends know I am exactly the same as I was before dancing and I will continue to be the same for alot of my life, I am sure. I just dont understand why as soon as people find out youre a dancer, you have to defend yourself until youre blue in the face to prove that you are still a good person and not some morally bankrupt, drug addicted, homewrecker with a hard on for every man and his checkbook. GRRRRRRRR!!!!

    OK I am now done. When I go postal and start shooting everyone who puts me down for dancing, bake me a cake with a nail file in it so I can escape...(dont wanna further the stripper stereotype)

  2. #2
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    I totally relate to your whole rant. Here's a hug

  3. #3
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    I can totally relate. I'm a very boring person--gym, tanning, work, sleep, hiking, work, sleep, repeat--in that equation alone, it sounds even more ordinary. If you substitute "work" with "strip," I all of a sudden become this interesting conversation piece, especially for non-industry people that I've just met.

    I could tell people that I run an outreach program that saves homeless children from the street and donate my off-time at the free clinic and that wouldn't make a difference. People would still find that stripping is the most interesting thing about me. Comes with the territory, I guess.

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    Banned rozz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    They think I am going to get all drunk and start dancing on the bar or give lapdances in the living room, snorting coke off of fake tits and making out with any other drunk girl in the vicinity. I AM SICK OF THE STEREOTYPES! I am THE most boring person in the world. IN THE WORLD!!! I do nothing in my free time besides watch tv and play online, lay around with my cats and play with my ferrets.

    When I go postal and start shooting everyone who puts me down for dancing, bake me a cake with a nail file in it so I can escape...(dont wanna further the stripper stereotype)
    I'm a Wacrcraft-playing, sweatpants-at-home-wearing, cat-owning, book-devouring loser. I'm utterly, utterly boring. But for some reason, everyone thinks that I (and every other stripper out there) have crazy, orgy-and-drug-filled lives. I guess it's just more entertaining to believe the fantasy than to realize we're simply normal women.


    P.S. What flavor do you want the cake? I make a mean carrot with cream cheese frosting one.

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    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    ^^^LOL. I'm sooooo boring, but even being a retired dancer is the most fascinating thing about me to other people

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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Before I started dancing I never put judgement on the girls that danced. I always saw it as way to make money and do what they have to do, honestly, I used to think strippers were like these super humans, kinda like the way we view celebrities. Once I started dancing, I realised that was so far from the truth. I guess with the fantasy that people have, they rather believe that instead thinking that we're real people. Just like we see people in Hollywood, they're just like us, just richer with more publicity. I think a lot of people see strippers as mini celebrities, that's my opinion. I know it sucks, because I've really got no life either, it's very low key; my cats, my soap opera, my family and a few friends. Nothing crazy about it. I think when you start dancing, you find out who really are your friends and who aren't. The friends I have either are dancers or were in the past so it doesn't matter to them, I do know that if I told people that I went to High School with back home, they'd be sooooooo judgemental. I think some people are close minded and it's better to not tell them.

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    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Just out of curiosity, how old are you? I used to have those types of peeves when I was younger, but now I don't get that type of stuff at all. Almost all of my friends are old friends that I've had for 10 or more years. Beyond that, I don't tell everyone that I dance, and certainly not groups of men in bars.

    If you start talking about your job you can expect questions. If a random person asks me what I do I tell them I work in a bar, and that's it, I don't give any details because it isn't anyone's business. But, maybe that's just me.
    Check out my new eBay auctions.......

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    What sucks even more is that usually when I go out, if someone I dont know asks me what I do for a job I tell them I am a hostess or a waitress just so they wont be "on" me all night expecting somethng or thinking I am a easy piece of ass! I am by no means ashamed of what I do, but I also dont go around bragging about it strange men because I dont like the kind of attention I get from it.
    I dont tell groups of men at bars that I dance...but I do go out with guy friends who inevitably run into more guys they know and they already know I dance whether I know them or not. Sounds really confusing but I live in a really small town so if you so much as sneeze the next day people across town are gonna ask if youre feeling ok...haha

    I am 26, and like you said, you would think that everyone had grown up past the "looking down on you" for your job thing. But alas they have not, and I dont know why...its gets to the point where I start to wonder if they are just jealous, maybe that is just a way to justify it in my mind but I still believe it.

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by rozz View Post
    P.S. What flavor do you want the cake? I make a mean carrot with cream cheese frosting one.
    Sweet, hell yeah, carrot cake is the bombness...and cream cheese frosting just seals the deal! Can I pretend I am in jail just for the food? haha

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    Banned rozz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    For pretend prison, you get only crappy healthy carrot cake. And NO FROSTING.

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by rozz View Post
    For pretend prison, you get only crappy healthy carrot cake. And NO FROSTING.
    Awww!! NO! But...please....I will wear those sexy prison stripes and sing "working on the chain gang" just for you!

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    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Angry Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post

    She says I am "too smart to be taking my clothes off for a living" she says I am wasting my life, and I am a dissapointment because she expected more out of me.

    If I had a fucking dollar for everytime I've been told this... shit I wouldn't need to be stripping!

    Fuck them dude, seriously. I had straight As my whole life that whole deal, and you can tell half the time by talking to me I'm not just some stupid brawd with no fucking sense or grasp of the world around her. And still, I hear this over and over.

    With my grades and my ability, I could be a doctor. I could be a teacher, I could be a lawyer. I could be all these upstanding amazing respectful jobs just because I have the brains. Know what? I love drawing and painting. I love preforming. I love modelling. I FUCKING LOVE STRIPPING. You don't need booksmarts to do any of those jobs, but so what if I love doing what I do? I'm sure there are a lot of other things strippers can be doing.

    What the fuck ever happened to chosing your career because it makes you HAPPY??? Because you ENJOY it??? I don't WANT to be a doctor or lawyer or any of that bullshit. Besides, do you think stripperscan make over $1000 in a night by being fucking braindead, like guys just hand it to us for fun? No it takes a certain degree of skill.

    Again. FUCK THEM. When they finish their 4 year degrees and are stuck behind a cubible every day, nursing cups of coffee to the tune of the fax machine, and unhappy because work is a chore and life is oh so boring - and oh, why didn't i follow my dream of playing music or whatever other fantasy - and settled for the "sensible", "smart" job, well that's just sad.

    my brains and smarts work perfectly fine outside the workplace environment thank you very much, as well as in. ugh.





    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    I just dont understand why as soon as people find out youre a dancer, you have to defend yourself until youre blue in the face to prove that you are still a good person and not some morally bankrupt, drug addicted, homewrecker with a hard on for every man and his checkbook. GRRRRRRRR!!!!

    i'm not gonna lie, men's credit cards really hits me in some good places. and that atm machine? ultimate hard on. who says i'm faking all that excitement in vip? i got CASH, motherfuckerrrr!!

  13. #13
    DJ Maimed
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    You don't need to defend yourself...just be true to yourself....and if "they" can't handle it.....fark em'.

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    Member **Orchid**'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    i get that too, and i work at a sex phone place! they think my stories are so cool.. i think theirs are much more interesting!

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    I used to get this from friends and aquentinces, but after I started (obviously) leaving them in the dust financially, they changed their tune.

    It does help that I am happily married, for years now. I think if I were single I would get a lot more crap from folks about being a dancer. When I get a question from someone about "How does your husband feel about you stripping?" I answer with "He's married to a woman who is hot enough to out earn him based on looks and personality alone. How do you think he feels? Lucky Bastard is the main word that comes to mind."


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    God/dess anomar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    With the first situation... if they're guy friends you don't particularly care about then just make a pointed comment or two like "Ha, I know that some people expect me to be crazy and take my clothes off in public all of the time... but honestly, it's nice to only do that sort of thing when men are throwing hundreds of dollars at me. That's why I think girls gone wild videos are hilarious... I can't believe those women let themselves get ripped off like that, showing their tits for a t-shirt or something." Make it obvious that you're a classy lady!

    Another part of that... why *don't* you do other things that just dance? I don't mean it in a bad way, just that if all you do all day is pet yer cats and go online (yay SW), then you really have lots and lots of time filled with potential. For instance, I just landed a prestigious internship with a company. I told them I waitress at night -- but that I'm free 7 days a week, noon-5 p.m. They were thrilled! Whenever anyone I don't know asks me what I do for a living then I tell them about my (unpaid) work. You can even do something like volunteer at your local library like three hours a week. It might help you a whole lot with being aggravated at always being 'the stripper'. Why don't you try being 'the librarian' too?

    I don't know about that second situation. It's amazing how people will translate their own jealousy into hateful things about other people. Especially when right now, we are young and yet can afford things like health insurance and planning for forty years into the future. Amazing!

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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    I dont tell groups of men at bars that I dance...but I do go out with guy friends who inevitably run into more guys they know and they already know I dance whether I know them or not. Sounds really confusing but I live in a really small town so if you so much as sneeze the next day people across town are gonna ask if youre feeling ok...haha

    I am 26, and like you said, you would think that everyone had grown up past the "looking down on you" for your job thing. But alas they have not, and I dont know why...its gets to the point where I start to wonder if they are just jealous, maybe that is just a way to justify it in my mind but I still believe it.

    This is the same exact situation I was in a few weeks ago - I hung out with some guy friends who had more guy friends who all knew what I did. When they invited me over I thought it was just to hang out...when I got there it was question after question after question after lap dance request after free show request. But I attributed it, as someone up there said, to the fact that I'm young, and my friends are young. The adult world is just new to them and they think of strippers as "celebrities" too. But I agree it is f*ing annoying as hell.

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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    I've called people on their real motives. I'll say to the loud mouth "You're hell bent on attempting to publicly degrade me right? It's too bad you're so pathetic to attack women." They don't like it and more importantly, I've stripped them down in that moment to the hateful garbage they are. Everyone's looking around and down at the floor and DESPERATELY want to talk about something else! Just like I like it. See their gang attack for what it is and call them on it with all the contempt you feel in your heart.

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    Veteran Member lexXe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    I have lost a couple close friends due to the fact that I started dancing, and they didnt "morally" agree with it...most of them are hypocrites themselves in their own little ways but thats another story.
    Half the time this is an excuse for jealousy.

    Forget these types of people because there are many in this world who will respect and value your friendship.

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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    I am so sick of the bullshit that people attribute to dancing...

    Heres the deal. I go out with friends, we meet up with some of their friends whom I dont really know to well, and they spend half the night talking to me about dancing...But I am talking about guys. They will ask me all these retarded questions and then expect me to act all "girls gone wild"...
    One classic guy fantasy is the "stripper", and you just walked into their lives. Fantasy just became reality - and of course they're going to ask the questions. Your chance of escaping the retarded questions is about zero as soon as they find out what you do. It's an irresistable topic of conversation for most guys.

    I'm a guy who does see three dancers socially - oldest friendship goes back 5 years - and I have never told a single person outside the dancing game what these girls do for a living. They only tell their close friends (and none of my friends) what they do.

    If people don't know what you do, you can't be asked idiot questions.

    Phil.

    As a PS, one reason I've never talked about what my dancer friends do for a living is it's their decision who they tell and who they don't about what they do. It's not mine, and it would be a serious breach of trust on my part if I did start disclosing what they did.

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Agreed that friends and family will usually jump to the wrong conclusions about your choosing to be a 'stripper'. IMHO this stems from two things ... a fundamental misunderstanding of what actually goes on in strip clubs (i.e. they have little personal knowledge and instead base their judgements on the Hollywood Stripper Stereotype i.e. lying, thieving, drug addicted, stupid whores) , or a fundamental jealousy regarding the degree of personal confidence / courage / attractiveness / money involved in your stripping career.

    PS as has already been pointed out, but not specifically stated, lots of us 'strippers' also have college degrees and could (or already have) work(ed) in a 'straight' position / profession. I won't speak for any other dancers, but in my own case the rigid work schedules, the management bulls#@t, and the lack of professional respect that usually go along with 'straight' jobs is not something that I'm still willing to tolerate - and thanks to the proceeds from a decade of dancing I don't have to LOL !

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post

    Another part of that... why *don't* you do other things that just dance? I don't mean it in a bad way, just that if all you do all day is pet yer cats and go online (yay SW), then you really have lots and lots of time filled with potential. For instance, I just landed a prestigious internship with a company. I told them I waitress at night -- but that I'm free 7 days a week, noon-5 p.m. They were thrilled! Whenever anyone I don't know asks me what I do for a living then I tell them about my (unpaid) work. You can even do something like volunteer at your local library like three hours a week. It might help you a whole lot with being aggravated at always being 'the stripper'. Why don't you try being 'the librarian' too?
    I do volunteer work at the Humane society a couple days a week, I am getting experience for the job I am going to do when I stop dancing or if I stop dancing...haha I was just meaning as far as what I do in my *totally* free time, not the dancing/volunteering time. I sit at home as opposed to going out partying (not my thing) or whatever the stereotypical stripper does. But really it wouldnt matter if I told people I worked for NASA in my offtime I would still be considered the "stripper"...ya know?

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    Member WyldKat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Friends who act like that aren't your real friends anyway. It's your choice what you want to do for a living and as long as you're not hurting anyone, its legal, and you genuinely love what you do, its none of their business.

    As for guys, well I don't think that will ever change. They go to a strip club for a fantasy and they'll always think of strippers as a fantasy sex object for a first impression. I think its pretty difficult for many men to separate the fantasy girl in the strip club who indulges in his sexual fantasies to the reality girl who's just doing a job.

    lol I think many men would be pretty depressed if they really accepted that strippers aren't really interested in them and that its just a job.

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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    just tell people you work in sales, which, technically, you do

    always, always fuck what anyone else thinks. you live for you, not for people who dont matter to you.

    ive done all manner of straight jobs and tried all kinds of other jobs too and im going back to stripping. why? because i like to sleep in. because i like to maintain my looks and have the time to do so. because i like to be my own boss. because i fucking love to dance. because im an exhibitionist - a show off. because i get off on people getting off on me. because its more of a challenge than faxing, filing and tea making. because i dont hav to make the same old bullshit office desk small talk with people i dont care about. because i like to watch men squirm. because i like the power trip. because i like my "work clothes", i could go on...

    id say because i like the money but i never was a good earner so im hoping that the discovery of hustle hut and dancerwealth HSC will change all that
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    Veteran Member casaubon1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Sick of the bullshit (mini-rant)

    Being a guy I am reluctant to weigh in on such a sensitive topic, so mods, please zap this if it is out of place.

    I wonder if the good income a successful stripper can earn is in part the result of the stereotypes. The stereotypes probably keep a lot of attractive women -- ones who have the physical ability -- out of the profession. I know that the business is getting more competitive, but successful strippers still are relatively highly paid. If there weren't any stereotypes, wouldn't a lot of attractive women who are now in lower paying office and sales jobs be attracted to the profession, making it even more competitive?

    We talk a lot here about how attitude and confidence are important to selling. I suspect that a strong sense of self is important to longevity in the profession as well. My admiration to the women who handle it and keep going.

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