Results 1 to 23 of 23

Thread: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

  1. #1
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2006
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    4,967
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Angry does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    i am 27 years old and have never recieved a nice piece of jewelry as a gift from a significant other or family member. i think that is really depressing. i dont think that i am a snob or a stuck up bitch but i think that somewhere along the lines someone shoudl have liked me enought to buy me something nice. the nicest gift a bf has ever got me was a pink hello kitty television. the worst gift, and i shit you not was a febreeze airfreshener and some burnt cds.

    my bf asked me what i wanted for xmas and told him a diamond ring or earrings and he just laughed at me. i know he cant afford them and i dont expect to get them seriously but he was like if you want that you need to start going out with ritch old men.

    he said i was materialistic for wanting something like that and hurt my feelings.

    is it so wrong for me to want someone to love me enought to get me something fancy or am i a huge scrooge?

  2. #2
    God/dess Emily's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Las Vegas
    Posts
    11,302
    Thanks
    4
    Thanked 143 Times in 72 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    well, he shouldn't have asked!

    it doesn't make you a gold-digger unless you are dating him to get those things. It just means you have expensive taste.

    You probably emasculated him a little bit and hurt his feelings, so he snapped back at you.

  3. #3
    Yekhefah
    Guest

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    You can find some very nice jewelry on the cheap at pawn shops. My ex-husband bought be a pair of diamond earrings for the Chanukah before we got married, and I doubt he spent much on them at all. Maybe drop a hint.

    And no, it doesn't make you a golddigger to want jewelry. Most women love jewelry and it makes a romantic gift. You would be a golddigger if you were only dating him for expensive gifts, and clearly that isn't the case here.

  4. #4
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Cocoa Beach, FL
    Posts
    10,220
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 52 Times in 37 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Nothin wrong with wanting such things! I know I totally want a ring for xmas... *glares at male* My Nana taught me to appreciate fine jewelry, and I don't see anything wrong with it!
    Number of times Rickrolled on stage: 6
    *******************************

    Marasmus ... "Ladies don't fart. They butt-laugh."
    Marasmus says, "Oh no, that wasn't gas, it was merely a rectal chuckle."

    Marek says, "A friend of mine got punched in the face by a dominatrix stripper about two weeks ago and I thought of you."

  5. #5
    Veteran Member JennyDahl's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Florida during the winter !
    Posts
    320
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    If you ONLY want someone for their money or what they give you that is what constitutes a gold digger .......your BF sounds like he was in a asshead type mood , hopefully he is not always like that . Next time he wants a BJ tell him he is a freaky slut and if he wants things like that he should date a whore ......
    Don't you just love me ?!?

  6. #6
    God/dess
    Joined
    Feb 2002
    Location
    OUTTATHISWORLD
    Posts
    7,219
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 23 Times in 15 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Hell no it does not make you a gold digger! He shouldn't have even asked you what you wanted if he was just going to laugh! Hey, for $150 he can get you a .25 tcw pair of Gemesis blue diamond earrings. They're cultured (created in the lab) but I sure as hell wouldn't mind having a pair. You can get a pair from super tiny up to .5 ct total weight here:

    Read about the process and how they compare to natural diamonds here or just google cultured diamond. btw, these are NOT cubic zirconia, they have the same properties as a naturally occuring diamond...the only difference is they're flawless!

    eta: they come in pink and yellow too!


  7. #7
    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Another Country
    Posts
    18,664
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 148 Times in 100 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    I like how you're NOT a golddigger if you ask for anything else for Christmas. HELLO... asking for stuff means you WANT stuff... it's all stuff... just because you WANT someone more expensive doesn't mean you EXPECT it.

    I always wanted some nice jewellery, too. It's so sad when I ask my fiancé, "Just buy me an engagement ring that costs more than a playstation!" Because my last husband spent $150 on my ring! D: You're not a gold digger, you just want to feel that you're worth the value of something like that.

    Geezus, for Christmas I bought the mum in law a diamond and gold necklace. The charm itself costs $100 and the new chain costs $75. It wasn't expensive... and it's very nice.


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

  8. #8
    Featured Member Katherine's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    NYC Baby
    Posts
    1,359
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    I'm a ShopNBC.com and QVC.com freak. Check the clearance jewelery sections. I've scored some great deals!!! In fact, I just got a beautiful thick rose gold chain for like 60 bucks! And a pretty pendant for under a 100 and there you go!

    LOL, want me to e-mail your bf the links? LOL.

    Sophia_Starina = stripper goddess


    "Guys are so damn lame, the only way they can halfway make up for it is by opening their wallets."

    AznExtasy

  9. #9
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2006
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    4,967
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    haha thanks guys. no he pretty much is always like that. hes pretty good at making me feel like shit about myself so i dont think he will make it very far into the new year.

  10. #10
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Boston MA
    Posts
    5,670
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 144 Times in 74 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    How about buying yourself the jewelry you want? Or is that too simple?

    Seems like an obvious choice to me.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  11. #11
    Veteran Member JennyDahl's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Florida during the winter !
    Posts
    320
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by Casual Observer View Post
    How about buying yourself the jewelry you want? Or is that too simple?

    Seems like an obvious choice to me.
    NONONONONONONONONONOOOOOOOOOO , not until you dump his ass . If you buy the things that he will not buy for you then you are telling him its ok and it is not .........why do people date people that they treat like shit ??? If you treat someone badly then you must not like them to much SO WHY DATE THEM ???
    Don't you just love me ?!?

  12. #12
    Veteran Member JennyDahl's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Florida during the winter !
    Posts
    320
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by i.breathe.in View Post
    haha thanks guys. no he pretty much is always like that. hes pretty good at making me feel like shit about myself so i dont think he will make it very far into the new year.

    Awwwwww , geez sweetie YOU KNOW WHAT ??? this is what you should do ..buy yourself something fabulous , like the jewels .....and then wear them the next time you see him and when he comments on it go " Oh yeah I bought them to replace your cheap ass , see ya "
    Don't you just love me ?!?

  13. #13
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Boston MA
    Posts
    5,670
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 144 Times in 74 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Awwwwww , geez sweetie YOU KNOW WHAT ??? this is what you should do ..buy yourself something fabulous , like the jewels .....and then wear them the next time you see him and when he comments on it go " Oh yeah I bought them to replace your cheap ass , see ya "
    Thereby proving his original assertion? I guess that's one approach...
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  14. #14
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2006
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    4,967
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    its not that hes cheap hes just poor and thats ok. i have no problem with that. its that hes the type that doesnt show positive emotions and doesnt know how to show empathy. the only emotions he is good at showing is cynicism and sarcasm. im one of those people that need a very positive person to keep me uplifted. he doesnt do that.

    i dont stay with people htat treat me like shit, now is just not a good time to break it off and besides im holding onto some hope that things could improve becuase he wasnt like this the first 4 months we were together.

  15. #15
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Planet Earth
    Posts
    1,809
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    No it does not make you a gold digger
    Fools laugh at others. Wisdom laughs at itself...Osho

  16. #16
    Banned i.breathe.in's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2006
    Location
    ohio
    Posts
    4,967
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by lilithmorrigan View Post
    You're not a gold digger, you just want to feel that you're worth the value of something like that.

    exactly thats how i look at it.

  17. #17
    Featured Member The_Oceans's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2003
    Location
    SoCal, Valley of the Antelopes
    Posts
    1,522
    Thanks
    36
    Thanked 30 Times in 28 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by lilithmorrigan View Post
    I like how you're NOT a golddigger if you ask for anything else for Christmas. HELLO... asking for stuff means you WANT stuff... it's all stuff... just because you WANT someone more expensive doesn't mean you EXPECT it.

    I always wanted some nice jewellery, too. It's so sad when I ask my fiancé, "Just buy me an engagement ring that costs more than a playstation!" Because my last husband spent $150 on my ring! D: You're not a gold digger, you just want to feel that you're worth the value of something like that.

    Geezus, for Christmas I bought the mum in law a diamond and gold necklace. The charm itself costs $100 and the new chain costs $75. It wasn't expensive... and it's very nice.
    lilithmorrigan, you get out of my head, young lady! (hehe, just playing, cuz I had the same thought)

    There's nothing wrong with wanting, or wishing for, pretty, expensive things. And of course we appreciate those things most when we get them from people we care about and love. As everyone else has said, it gets dangerous when we expect those things, and react negatively to our loved ones because we don't get expensive things from them.

    It's part of what makes this time of year so stressful for people. I know that I'd love to buy Christmas presents for my friends and family without regard for cost. But I'm on a budget, just like everyone...and so I try to concentrate on finding gifts that are meaningful, or useful (for example, I got an REI gift card for a cousin last Christmas...gift cards aren't all that "personal", but he's a snowboarder and an outdoorsy guy, so it worked perfectly).

    All that said, the OP's BF could've been less of an asshole about it all.
    "Women, not girls, rule my world" - Prince

    "No parking on the dance floor" - Midnight Star

  18. #18
    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2003
    Location
    SoCal
    Posts
    7,772
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 40 Times in 35 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by JennyDahl View Post
    NONONONONONONONONONOOOOOOOOOO , not until you dump his ass . If you buy the things that he will not buy for you then you are telling him its ok and it is not .........why do people date people that they treat like shit ??? If you treat someone badly then you must not like them to much SO WHY DATE THEM ???
    I don't think he's treating her like shit by not (and who knows what he'll surprise you with anyways) buying her expensive jewelry. I agree with CO. I also don't think that wanting jewelry makes you a gold digger. If he can't afford it, then it doesn't really matter though... It's what his gift REPRESENTS that matters (of course you already knew that... You said it yourself.)
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

  19. #19
    Veteran Member Danielle_'s Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    664
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    You're definitely not a golddigger. I have a friend whose boyfriend proposed to her with amounted to a cracker jack ring. Now she thought it was ridiculous but if she was still in a good relationship with him I think she would have accepted it for the time being. If he can't afford it that's fine, but I don't think he should have laughed.

  20. #20
    Banned Madcap's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Saint effing Louis
    Posts
    6,804
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Is there a chick on the planet that doesn't want expensive jewelry?

  21. #21
    Featured Member Katherine's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    NYC Baby
    Posts
    1,359
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    ^^^^ nope.

    Sophia_Starina = stripper goddess


    "Guys are so damn lame, the only way they can halfway make up for it is by opening their wallets."

    AznExtasy

  22. #22
    Picaresque
    Guest

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by Casual Observer View Post
    How about buying yourself the jewelry you want? Or is that too simple?

    Seems like an obvious choice to me.

    it's not JUST the item itself, although fine jewelry is lovely. The other part is knowing that your significant other thinks so much of you that he would buy you something that nice.

    A can of air freshener and a CD (to use the previous poster's shitty-gift example) says "i went to the grocery and spent $2.50 on your birthday, that's all you're worth. i couldn't be arsed to save any money or spend any time getting you a thoughtful, substantial gift. enjoy." ugh!

    I'm not into jewelry myself, but I can relate. The one "romantic", sweet thing that I've always wanted a significant other to do is to give me flowers backstage after I've performed in a show. (I'm an opera singer). And I let my previous significant others know that that was the ultimate sweet gesture in my mind.

    Only ONE guy I've dated ever actually did that--surprised me with lovely gardienias before I sang in a concert. And it happened to be the only guy that I ended up having a long term relationship with. Not a coincidence--the type of guy who would do that for me is the type of guy who VALUES ME in general.

    Same with the diamond earrings--a thoughtful present says to anyone, "I value you". You could get the diamonds yourself, just like I could technically just buy myself flowers before an opera...but half the value of a gift like that is the message and meaning that it comes with when recieved as a gift from someone else.

  23. #23
    God/dess RoseWhite's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2006
    Location
    On a babymoon.
    Posts
    3,145
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 18 Times in 13 Posts

    Default Re: does wanting nice jewelry for a gift make me a gold digger?

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap View Post
    Is there a chick on the planet that doesn't want expensive jewelry?
    Meekly raises hand.

    I DO NOT think it's golddigging at all for the OP to want jewelry, or for anyone else to want it, either. But I had to reply to that - I really truly don't want it. For ME, I'd personally rather have gifts that (A) reflect my interests (I only have about 4 or 5 dozen of them), (B) makes my life easier, or (C) lead to shared experiences like trips together.

    An extravagant gift for me is a DVD set of one of my favorite directors or high quality cookware or books by authors I love (category A), or something like a Palm Pilot or satellite radio system (category B), or a ski weekend for the two of us (category C). The occasional dress or pair of shoes that reflects my style is definitely nice too, but jewelry that's really expensive just stresses me out, personally. I'm always terrified I'll lose it if I wear it, so it just ends up festering in my jewelry box, defeating its entire purpose.

    My mom once gave me a lovely heirloom - my grandma's engagement ring put into a new setting. Beautiful sentiment, but I cannot bring myself to wear it regularly - it would be even MORE horriible if I lost something that has such powerful emotional value on top of the monetary.

    AGAIN, to reiterate, that is not to say that I judge anyone who does prefer jewels AT ALL, I just couldn't resist pointing out that there are a few weirdos like me out there (or maybe it IS just me, but same diff.)
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

Similar Threads

  1. Just got my book in the mail - Gold Digger's Guide
    By lilmisssunshine in forum Other Work
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 02-08-2011, 12:44 PM
  2. Gold Digger Secrets
    By lethalsoul in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 09-11-2009, 12:46 AM
  3. Umm I'm no gold digger but ....
    By thickienikkie in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 54
    Last Post: 02-13-2008, 03:47 PM
  4. Great Answer To A Gold Digger
    By DJ Machismo in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 11-08-2007, 11:21 AM
  5. Gold Digger dating service ?
    By T-10 in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 02-21-2007, 12:23 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •