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Thread: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

  1. #26
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    I would say that he isn't your real friend if he is trying to rob your time from you at work. It might be more worth it to you to ditch him so you can go make money elsewhere. He's not stupid, because he can obviously earn the money he makes. You've explained it to him and he still doesn't 'get it', then he must be trying to milk your time. I wouldn't count this person as a friend.

  2. #27
    Senior Member WhiteTara's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    Echo, don't abandon him until you've talked to him. Asperger people often get misinterpreted or perceived as rude. You have to judge for your friend since you're the one who knows him. Even a mild case of Aspergers can lead to real misunderstandings. My fiance is an aerospace engineer, smart, successful...very impaired communication-wise.

    I stand by my suggestion to be blunt. If he persists, then you may have to cut him off completely either as a friend or a customer. But try a direct approach first.

  3. #28
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    aspergers or not, you've gotten yourself into a situation that you're going to have to be blunt to get out of. you said there have been times you've explained things to him in a very straight forward manner & he seems to let it go in one ear and out the other. whether this is related to his disorder or not is irrelevant. you're gonna have to treat him as a long time regular who now expects your attention at work for free.

    sit with him, have a drink and drop the "look, we need to talk" bomb on him. then repeat after me "i enjoy your company at work but i need to make sure you undestand that when you come & see me at work, i am AT WORK. the reason i work is for the reason everyone works: to make money. i am here to make money & i do that by selling dances & conversation. if i am going to be spending time with you, i need to be making money for that time. if you're not going to pay me for my time, i will have to spend time with other customers so that i can make money while i'm here."

    it sounds repetative & obvious but you have to spell it out for him. you are establishing a business relationship. leave no loopholes. if you really want his money ITC, you have to reintroduce the "time = money" equation into your relationship.

    again, aspergers or not, the situation will turn out one of two ways: he'll be embarassed & upset & that's the end of that OR he'll understand what you're saying & start paying you for your time again.

  4. #29
    Member crackncash's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    Withdrawn.....
    Last edited by crackncash; 01-02-2007 at 09:48 PM.

  5. #30
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    Quote Originally Posted by crackncash View Post
    I'm sorry but as a customer, this seems very strange to me. I would pay to see you OTC but only if you gave me lapdances in my car or at the movies....this leads to a question I have? If I wanted to hire a dancer to give dances OTC is this doable? How should I broach this subject with the dancer?

    You should read the "Important Information" thread at the top of STRIPPING GENERAL. Here's the link:

  6. #31
    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    Who gives lapdances at the movies or in a car? Those seem to be 2 of the more extreme places a lapdance would go down. And WTF does that have to do with my post? I dont give LD outside of work, and said the exact opposite...men. Bleh.

  7. #32
    Banned jasmine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Not really sure how to broach a particular topic...

    I would tell him your manager won't let you set with him unless you are bringing in money. I had a manager who actually did this in the past, if they weren't spending much he would tell you he needed you on the floor. If this isn't working, just say "I would love to stay and chat, but I have to bring in X amount of dollars tonight. I have to pay my rent (car payment, bills, whatever)."

    Best of luck! This is a tough situation when dealing with a regular that you actually like.

    Jasmine

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