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Thread: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

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    Default Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    I just had to tell everyone about this weirdo last night! This customer came up to me on stage a couple times, tipped me and asked me to come see him. When I was talking to him while I was on stage, he seemed really (for a customer) seemed understanding that I was busy, blah, blah. You know how some will get so mad when you don't come down and see them right now! Well, he was all don't worry, whenever you get a chance. So, I finally made my way over to him and he said he'd prefer me to just talk to him instead of dance and that he'd pay me the dance price instead of me dancing. I thought ok. Well, within a minute of our conversation he was just getting waaaay too close! He was trying to hug me, was doing it hard & trying to pull me really close to him. I had my head way back because he was just getting too close for comfort. He was touching my butt or anything like that but was really invading my personal space. Before a chair came available he kept trying to get me to sit on his lap, I wouldn't anyway but we're not allowed to at our club and he couldn't understand why. Well when the chair came available I sat down which was next him and then he actually took my arm and was trying to place it around his neck & shoulders!!!! He said "I just love to cuddle". That's when I said "well, it was really nice talking to you but there's just a few minutes left in the night & I need to take care of some things". So then he paid me $10 and then I left him. As he was leaving, I was dancing for another customer and I saw that guy wave bye to me. I pretended to not see him. Eeeeewwww!!!! He was sooooooo creepy and I've met some real creeps before but he was one of the top! I've never had a customer actually try to take my arm and physically put it around him! Can I say what a clingy, annoying, desperate loser!!! Has a customer ever done anything like this to any of you? *still shuddering over it*

  2. #2
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    It sounds alot like the customer I described in this thread:



    He had gotten so bad, that the last time he was in the club, he basically hovered around where I was dancing for another regular and when he saw I was finished, he got up to wait for me. I didn't realize until I turned around from getting paid that he was standing RIGHT BEHIND ME! That creeped me out enough. I I let him know that I had someone else waiting and he whined, "Awwwwww, how long is it gonna be???" I told him I didn't know and he (sounding like a 5th grader) said, "Okay, I'll wait." I was not feeling okay about him. I even tried to send another girl who had danced for him before so he would get off my case. I just get really vibed out from him...so I ended up going to VIP, he was still there when I got done. I danced for another guy, then because he was watching me still, I decided I had to get out of there. I explained the situation to housemom and our manager, and they told me I could go. So, I was in the DJ booth to check out (upstairs) and I see him looking up, grab his jacket and start walking toward the stairs. I told the DJ, "Oh, I gotta get outta here!" and I RAN to the dressing room...by the time I got to the door, I could see him talking to the DJ. As I was getting dressed, one of the VIP hostesses came to tell me he was asking for me, and I told her the situation and she ended up telling him that I left and would be gone for a couple of weeks....now, I know whoever has read this far might be thinking, "Gosh, he just wants to HUG you and give you money for it! Don't be running away from him!" But it's not like that...he shows no respect for my personal space, and I doubt he could learn it. Too needy, wants to be mothered, it feels like my positive energy literally gets transfered to him when he wants to hug me for so long...I need my good vibes to keep myself going, and frankly, they cost more than $10 a song!!!

    Sorry to make that such a long vent...I didn't intend to hijack your thread. Just know that you're not alone!

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    That's exactly how I felt last night!!!! It was a totally different feeling than the annoying ahole customer, this guy almost seemed stalkerish! Couldn't you have gotten that guy kicked out for following you around like that? I'll tell ya, if that guy from last night would've done that to me, he would've been kicked out!

    I remember that thread now that I just read it and to be quite honest I really didn't understand what you meant by all that because I've had plenty of customers that wanted to sit back in VIP and just cuddle and get the GFE, but none of them have ever invaded my personal space. My personal space is I don't like someone trying to get all up in my face, holding onto me so hard that it's hurting my back like I'm being suffocated and I've never had a customer that actually took my arm and put it around his neck. I've had plenty of weird customers that gave me the creeps but I have to say that guy creeped me out more than any other customer. He really seemed like he'd be a stalker, serial killer, someone who'd become psychotic! It was the weirdest feeling and I wouldn't have understood it until last night. I just hope he doesn't come back to try to see me because thankfully so far I don't have any regulars and hope to keep it that way!
    Last edited by leogirl876; 12-30-2006 at 04:20 PM. Reason: Addition comments

  4. #4
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    My manager did offer to kick him out, but my shift was almost over anyway, so I decided to just leave. I think it may come to that...I haven't seen him since then, that was at the beginning of the month and then I did take 2 weeks or so off and just went back on Thursday...

    That kind of stalkerish behavior isn't okay from anyone, even if they do want to spend money...I hope your situation resolves itself and he doesn't come back!

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Yuck! I've had custy's try that shit so I know what you mean... Like, it is going to take WAY more than $10 for me to cuddle with YOU, Mr. Creepy.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    I have a few customers that keep trying to hold my hand, for some reason it totally creeps me out! Especially during a dance. I usually just pull my hand away, though, it's not like they are doing anything awful, but gawd, it's. just. so. creepy.

    I've got a "hoverer" too, it's uncomfortable, but I've known him long enough to realize that he is not really creepy, just shy and lacking in interpersonal skills. He followed me from another club. When he is there, I am constantly tripping over him! He does get dances from me, but he can, uhemm, "handle" only one or two, then he pretty much runs away.

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    You're right to trust your instincts on this. If you feel there's something stalkeresque about his behavior, that's exactly what it is. Ignore the guy at all costs.

    -Ev

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Um, if that is the creepiest thing you've had to deal with as a stripper, I canNOT wait to start dancing in Atlanta


    But yes, I have dealt with dudes like that and they are annoying. I'd much rather deal with a cuddler than a groper or a poker though.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Ok, that wasn't the creepiest thing, I've had guys grab the kitty and yes, that does feel much worse, it's just this guy gave me a stalker feeling that nobody else has.

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    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by leogirl876 View Post
    Ok, that wasn't the creepiest thing, I've had guys grab the kitty and yes, that does feel much worse, it's just this guy gave me a stalker feeling that nobody else has.
    Yeah, at least with the grabby pervs, their motives are known...with the huggy, cuddly, stalkerish types, they have ulterior motives for their "nice" behavior.

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    and with the grabby ones you can turn on the bitch switch and let them know they've crossed a line with you.....the guys who get weird like that though, what do you say? "Uhm, you're hugging me too much and it's totally creeping me out..." And yah, the guys who grab and poke DO suck, but it's equally uncomfortable to be stuck in a spot you feel you can't get out of.....

    Yuck.

    edited* Glam, your manager offered to remove him from the club???? Who is managing over there? My "old" manager would have told me to work the other side of the club and forget about it, after he teased me for a while.




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    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
    edited* Glam, your manager offered to remove him from the club???? Who is managing over there? My "old" manager would have told me to work the other side of the club and forget about it, after he teased me for a while.
    Mike was the manager...I just found out 5 days ago that they let him go...
    If you ever worked with him, he's one of the most awesome managers ever!!!

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    *sigh* yes, he was....well crap. And the CC saga continues.....




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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    most probably arent complete wierdos, just emotionaly stunted.
    they want to be liked by a woman and you in your clubs
    appear to them to be available.

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Glama, you beat me to the punch on that one!! I've tried reasoning with those types and any interaction positive or negative keeps them there. I'm receiving emails from some dude I blew off online. I told him we weren't compatible and he still won't go away!

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post

    But yes, I have dealt with dudes like that and they are annoying. I'd much rather deal with a cuddler than a groper or a poker though.
    Yup, me too!







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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    I used to have one who claimed to be some kind of hired assassin or something. He was always following me all around the bar and standing about 1 inch from me when I was giving dances. Yet he would only take a dance from me after he had been in the bar for hours. He wanted me to play pool with him for free, ballroom dance with him for free, and share his slimy, spit-covered cigarettes. I think he actually made sure to coat them with extra spit before he tried to shove them in my mouth.

    But wait, there's more! After a while, stalking me at work was not enough! He started threatening my customers. He tried to wait for me outside the bar and follow me home. He tried to force me to take money for a blow job.

    He got unstable in other ways, too. He got hauled out of the bar more than once b/c he refused to pay his cab fare. He was always telling people, "Don't you know who I am?"

    I told him off the week I quit smoking, so either my standing up to him or my no longer smoking did him in. I have not seen him more than once or twice after that.


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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Those types are what I refer to as psychic vampires. There are ways of dealing with them and making money off them, but like everyone else alluded to, they are not fun to deal with. I have to be mentally ready to take one on. These guys can be bossed around a bit, but guilt is the best method of extracting cash from them. They understand guilt, as that is a strong motivator for them.


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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Ive had a customer like this also. Its one of those awkward feelings that you cant describe why exactly its so disgusting. Just...bleh. Dont do it.

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    Default Re: Don't invade my personal space!!!!!

    Well, there's a difference between a standard cuddler type and a stalker type. I had a stalker type who freaked me out so much I was afraid of walking from my car to my apartment. My apartment got broken into and all my clothes had been gone through, and a few of my stripper clothes stolen. I hauled ass and moved away. Then after I moved back, it was over a year later, I saw the dude at the club and he tried grabbing my arm and pulling me over as I walked by. I never went back to that club after that night.

    The standard cuddler types just want to have that 'intimate' experience as their fantasy. Just like most guys want the 'sexual' fantasy experience. I don't mind the cuddlers.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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