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Thread: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

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    Newbie delasangre's Avatar
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    Default Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    I may speak for a the minority but I hate it when I tip dancers on stage and they put their legs around my head and force me into their personal areas. They may grab my head and rub my face against their tits. Half of the time I have glasses on and it is embarrassing. I don't like people touching me unless I feel comfortable with them. If it was the other way around, I would probably get thrown out of the club. This has happened at the most classiest of clubs here in my town. It makes me personally not want to tip on stage. And I tip so dancers know I am game.

    Is it within the rules of the club for dances to act this way?

    Any insight on why dancers do this or how to handle it or avoid it? Last few times it happened, I would just step back but the dancers almost fell off the stage because they put most of their weight on me.

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Wow. Haven't heard that complaint before. Most guys complain about not getting enough mileage stageside.

    You might want to consider just laying your dollar on the stage and then backing off.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  3. #3
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    I understand your discomfiture, but if "contact tipping" is standard, you can't expect them to know you don't like it unless you tell them (politely). Try a "Oh, that's okay" and she will back off. We're trying to make you happy, not assault you - we're not making you uncomfortable on purpose.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    You keep adding/editing your post. Which can be confusing when one is trying to respond.

    As Jenny said, dancers arent mind readers. They assume you want what fun your dollar buys. If you want less than is traditionally expected, just give the dancers the body language to know that you are cool with no contact.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Veteran Member JennyDahl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Of course its in the rules of the club to do this or they wouldn't be doing it plan view on stage ......rule breaking usually only happens in dark corners .

    Anyways , just say NO !! After a few times they will all get the picture . We DEFINELY do not mind doing less work for your money TRUST ME , you will only offend the insecure bitches not the normal girls . Just hand them the tip and wave your hand NO or shake your head EVEN BETTER tell them before you give them the money thats really when you have their attention .
    Don't you just love me ?!?

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    Newbie delasangre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Thanks Jenny for responding! So, if I go back to a club I will try to catch it before it happens by telling them "No" politely before it gets out of hand.

    FBR, sorry but I tend to edit posts before I feel comfortable with them. I think I changed this one twice after I posted it and within a few minutes. You first response was less than a minute after I posted it. I will try not to post much anymore, if at all.

    But to you point, fun is not the same for all. I stated that I am likely speaking for the minority, which I have not changed since the first post.

    Edit: JennyDahl, I like your idea. I can just tip them and make it really short and sit down. I don't like going up on stage much to tip. But I do it because that what you are supposed to do. Unless the girl is really hot!

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    Veteran Member Taco Goblin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Yeah, that's a weird one. It's like.. a guy goes into a doctor's office, puts his arm behind his head and says "Doc, it hurts when I do this".. so the doctor says "Then don't do that."... badum bum bum..

    Assuming this isn't a creature living under a bridge harassing for tolls, I'd say for sure don't sit at the rail... then I'd say just place your dollar and return to your seat. If you stand there waiting for attention, typically you'll get it. Personally I feel like a dork standing at the rail.. or a small waif straight out of Dickens with an empty bowl.. "Please suh, may I have some more soup?".. So unless I know the dancer and am lookin for a hug or some quick whispered convo, I usually leave my dollar(s) at the rail, try to catch their eye and either tilt my head hello or mouth "thank you" and then trot off back to my seat.

    T-G

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by delasangre View Post
    Thanks Jenny for responding! So, if I go back to a club I will try to catch it before it happens by telling them "No" politely before it gets out of hand.

    FBR, sorry but I tend to edit posts before I feel comfortable with them. I think I changed this one twice after I posted it and within a few minutes. You first response was less than a minute after I posted it. I will try not to post much anymore, if at all.

    But to you point, fun is not the same for all. I stated that I am likely speaking for the minority, which I have not changed since the first post.

    Edit: JennyDahl, I like your idea. I can just tip them and make it really short and sit down. I don't like going up on stage much to tip. But I do it because that what you are supposed to do. Unless the girl is really hot!
    Just saying that when you make a post, and someone responds with a suggestion and then you edit your OP to include that suggestion, its confusing. No biggeee.

    A lot of customers enjoy club sanctioned mileage stageside. But I agree with your point that not everyone wants or expects the same thing when hitting the club. Just let the dancers know what you are comfortable with.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Newbie delasangre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    I understand FBR. I am bored too!

    Actually, I haven't even been to a strip club in about 1.5 years.

    Edit: I did go to one recently and only lasted a few minutes without feeling like a sleaze ball in there and left. The club was in pretty bad shape.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    So then... this is not an actual problem for you?

    How did you come to be here? Like, if you are not coming home and googling "strippers" how did you find us?
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Newbie delasangre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    It's an interest Jenny. I googled it and found the topics rather interesting. Thankyou.
    Last edited by delasangre; 01-01-2007 at 02:43 PM.

  12. #12
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Well, I was going to be a smartass and ask why you even go to a strip club if you don't like being touched, but then I decided that wouldn't be very helpful

    Why don't you try going to a club with lower contact in general along with the other suggestions?

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    Newbie delasangre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by CorsicaFire View Post
    Well, I was going to be a smartass and ask why you even go to a strip club if you don't like being touched, but then I decided that wouldn't be very helpful

    Why don't you try going to a club with lower contact in general along with the other suggestions?
    Because like I said in my first post, I only like being touch if I feel comfortable with the person. Actually, a gentle touch is okay. But a forceful controlling manipulation isn't

    Yea, I was thinking about going to an upscale new club in town that recently opened. I hear it's a five star, comparable to vegas club. I am thinking about it. If I am that bored, lonely and have time, I may go.

  14. #14
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    You should. It sounds like an upscale, low contact club is right up your alley for your comfort zone.

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by CorsicaFire View Post
    You should. It sounds like an upscale, low contact club is right up your alley for your comfort zone.
    I agree CF, but he may find it difficult to find no mileage stageside, even at upscale clubs. I know here locally we have one very swanky club where the dancers are all pretty much snooty model material but they still tend to "promote" themselves stageside in an effort to secure VIP money.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  16. #16
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    If I'm uncomfortable with something that's happening to me, I cough into my hand. The more uncomfortable I am, the bigger the cough. It's gotten my out of a lot of icky situations. So tip her, then cough, say, "I'd like some company, will you come over after your stage set is over, I'm just going to wash up first."

    idk if this makes sense.... but it really does work... people generally don't like germs.

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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by delasangre View Post
    I may speak for a the minority but I hate it when I tip dancers on stage and they put their legs around my head and force me into their personal areas. They may grab my head and rub my face against their tits.
    I love it when this happens to me.

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    it's nice to hear that not all guys are out for as much contact as they can get.
    the dancers are just trying to show appreciation for your tip by doing what most guys would enjoy.
    you could always give the tip to another dancer to give to the girl on stage - this is common at my club, but the other girl will prob want a tip too.

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    Featured Member evan_essence's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by delasangre View Post
    I hate it when I tip dancers on stage and they put their legs around my head and force me into their personal areas. They may grab my head and rub my face against their tits.
    I recommend one of these. She should get the hint.

    http://shop.mlb.com/sm-catchers-mask...p-1787204.html

    -Ev

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    I may speak for a the minority but I hate it when I tip dancers on stage and they put their legs around my head and force me into their personal areas. They may grab my head and rub my face against their tits. Half of the time I have glasses on and it is embarrassing. I don't like people touching me unless I feel comfortable with them.
    I don't like stage side contact either, and frankly, it's easy to avoid--I just sit back in my seat. When they prompt me to move forward for the tit-smearing, I generally just decline with a wave of my hand and offer my tip.

    Moreover, I don't wear my glasses to the club; too easy to get lost or damaged.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Member crackncash's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    I would suggest only tipping dancers you want to get closer too. You don't have to feel obliged to tip everyone who does a stage dance. I don't that's for sure. The other thing it does is lead them on to ask for a lapdance, which if I am guessing you probably turn down. No need to upset the dancers...that's for sure.

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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    A simple solution would be to just stay home and mail money to the club.

  23. #23
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    Quote Originally Posted by slowpoke View Post
    A simple solution would be to just stay home and mail money to the club.
    Yeah, send it to my club, ATTN: Ashley!!!

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    Veteran Member jannisary's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    A few nights ago a dancer ground my nose into her crotch so forcefully it actually hurt a little bit. Oh, I feel so violated!

    I jest, at the feeling violated part anyway, but truthfully I might have minded if it had been a different dancer.

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    Banned gingerlee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?

    If you are going to be upset if a girl gives you contact on stage, DON'T GO TO THE STAGE!!! Duh.

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