Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: whats wrong with me?

  1. #1
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Location
    melbourne australia
    Posts
    10,144
    Thanks
    328
    Thanked 219 Times in 133 Posts

    Thumbs down whats wrong with me?

    i am getting so frustrated with myself at work lately.
    i think i am becoming increasingly fearful of rejection.
    i know from reading hustle hut that it's important to approach every customer but i rarely if ever do this.

    instead of approaching customers sitting near the stages i seem to be approaching them at the bar??? don't even know what that's about.

    lately when i get a couple of no's i just run to the dressing room and sit out there for a while like a frightened mouse or something.
    sometimes my fear of rejection gets so bad that i don't even approach guys who are starring at me i just run past them to the dressing room.

    i have got into the mental state that every dance i get is pure luck and this is making me feel like im not worth their money and it's affecting my confidence.

    i think what has led to this problem is that every or nearly every guy seems to come into my club and treat it like a normal bar where they just want to pick us up and not buy dances.

    im sick of feeling this way.
    how do i get my confidence back and get over the fear of rejection??

  2. #2
    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Over the hills and far away
    Posts
    4,902
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 368 Times in 56 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    vacation. it will reset your confidence, clear your mind, and make you feel better.
    keep telling yourself while at work to stay positive and that it only takes one guy to make your night. half of this job is taking rejection, and knowing it's NOT personal. but first step, take a few nights off and vaca.

    Love it!

  3. #3
    Featured Member sophiemarie's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Brighton Beach, Brooklyn
    Posts
    831
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    Take a break from dancing. I took a 5 month break and now I am finially going back tonight.



    I Love Life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  4. #4
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,427
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 30 Times in 22 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    i agree with the girls saying take a break. it regenerates you and you probably need it. any time i take time off, whether it's a few days or longer, when you go back it's almost like a fresh start.

  5. #5
    Featured Member mild2wild's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    911
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    if you didn't want to take a break, maybe you could change your routine from the moment you leave the house to the minute you get home.

    There was a interview with a famous multi-million aire on the radio (it was a replay) and he was saying everyday he gets up to go to work, and was quite boring, so he decided to change his routine. Instead of taking the quickes route home he would take the longer way home, he would eat at different places each day, he would take different streets home, he would drink different beverages on the way and at work, he would eat different food all together. He explained that this keeps the mind functioning and alert, and also gave him something to look forward to. He had been doing this for over 5 years or so and he explained it made him feel like he was doing something different everyday!

    Good Luck xxx
    Last edited by mild2wild; 01-10-2007 at 03:20 AM. Reason: spelling
    Australian Strippers WWW.MILD2WILD.COM.AU

  6. #6
    Featured Member flickad's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    1,860
    Thanks
    268
    Thanked 103 Times in 67 Posts
    My Mood
    Pensive

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    If you don't want to take a break from dancing, you could try having two drinks (not enough to get drunk, but enough to boost your confidence) before working the room. Another thing that might work for you is reworking your look to some degree. Maybe do something new with your hair or get some new outfits that you feel fabulous in for an instant confidence boost.

    Don't be afraid to take dressing room breaks if you need them. You'll often come out feeling refreshed.

  7. #7
    Senior Member seishibella's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    109
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    When it slows down it does take a toll on the ol' confidence! Lately, I've been up and down...Four months ago I was ruthless and my wallet showed it :{D... after a couple months of stop/go and slow...Currently, my wallet shows it...but with moths!

    It's disappointing, but really it isn't you personally...As odd as that may sound. It really has to do with the people that come in, after the holidays their wallets are empty, yet their need for hot, naked or semi naked girls has not subsided...Unfortunately this does not always work to our advantage as instead of Booths or Champagne rooms they opt for cheap lap dances...Working us for all we've got. Or at least this is what I've come to conclude after two months of observation and frustration.

    The ideal is to take a few months off during these stressful times, yet if you can't afford it then you really have to bite the bullet and make the best of each night you work. Or try getting a day job or temp job for a couple months and dance on the fly when you feel up to it, some clubs are lenient for walk ins if they know you need a break...

    For every problem there is a solution! Never fear!

    Also another good thing to do is eat carbs and drink lots of water and juice. Take vitamins and make time for yourself...Hot baths...Pamper yourself to death if you have to or put your boyfriend/husband to work ;{D
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Living in Sin around Eden's Trim

  8. #8
    Senior Member seishibella's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    109
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    PS~ I do recommend drinking a bit at work, no more than four though depending on your tolerance. It'll get you over some of the confidence issues, but too much does just the opposite! As liquor is a depressant, be careful!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Living in Sin around Eden's Trim

  9. #9
    Senior Member lilmisscharisma's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    109
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    try buying a new outfit that you know will look amazing. when or if you get turned down instead of running off- say something to make him think about it- "alright babydoll well if you change your mind, just let me know. my philosophy is to try anything once.... twice if i like it." (smile and be flirty the entire time while sayin it. then when you're next on stage get really into it- some sexy glances at him a few times. the vibe you give off of confidence will win in any situation. kinda the same theory with relationships. If you're not completely happy with yourself then how can you expect someone else to be? If you haven't figured yourself out you can't expect someone to understand you.

  10. #10
    Veteran Member Angel1112's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    267
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: whats wrong with me?

    the problem is in your way of thining.
    Your thinking negative and so therefore your results are negative.
    It's easy to think negative and it does take work to think postive,if your not naturally a positive person....Where the mind is the body will follow.
    Act,speak, think positive and positve results will come.
    Change your mentality.
    Instead of running and hiding, and having a pity party when someone rejects you......shake it off and keep trying,don't give up.Expect lots of dances to come and keep a positve outlook on things and watch what happens.All dancers get rejected(turned down for a dance) ..it goes along with the job.It's nothing personal...it happens.
    Just keep trying and approach the customers and get practice on that it will come easy to do after awhile.Sometimes if you want something you just have to go out there and get it.You can't just stand there ...you have to be proactive and make a move.Epect it....live in epectancy.

Similar Threads

  1. whats wrong with my manycam
    By h0ttie in forum Other Work
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 05-23-2011, 05:39 PM
  2. Whats wrong with facebook???
    By kaiarose in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 11-01-2010, 09:33 PM
  3. Whats wrong with my lips?!!
    By naughty_princess in forum Body Business
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 05-25-2007, 08:11 PM
  4. Whats wrong with this picture?
    By WiseGuy_TX in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 01-09-2007, 08:41 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •