Last night I could not stand being at the club. I got there at 8 p.m. and by midnight I had collected $9 from onstage (went up four times). It was crowded with girls -- two other girls had already left because there were too many girls! Barely any customers. One of the last straws was when a motherfucking birthday party came in, cake and all, and ignored the racks. Fuckers! I ended up just telling them I'll pay them house fee next time I worked and used emergency cash to get home.
I just felt like I could not stand being there anymore. I had absolutely no momentum. Trying to make house fee felt like it would take about two more hours of grovelling and it did not seem to make sense since if I was focused and working smoothly I could make it up in twenty minutes the next time I came into work. I left work, changed my clothes and caught up with friends I hadn't seen in a month. I'm sure if I had stayed I would not have actually made any profit whatsoever and may have just started bawling -- I basically felt like I was paying to ensure my mental health, and that was okay.
Has anyone else ever just said 'fuck it' and left work? I've never done it before and certainly shall not make a habit out of it, but I'm so incredibly glad I did last night. I hate to say 'there's no money in the club' but the amount of competition and my ability to compete werre simply not on par.



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Now I have that stuck in my head.




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