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Thread: where am I?!!!

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default where am I?!!!

    Where can I tell people I am going when I'm dancing!!!!! Seriously, I though call centre work, bar work .....its all too vague and open to scrutiny!! Its no big deal to be dancing but some things you'd like to be privarte from some people you know! Any ideas.

  2. #2
    Cally
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Your a waitress/shootergirl/bartender whatever...

    In Toronto there is an agency that has hires out shooter girls to different clubs every night. Usually your not at the same club two nights in a row. So I just tell people I work as a shooter girl

    See if there is something like that in your area... otherwise just pick some small bar and say you work there.. or hey, just be honest

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Right problem is the person id be telling is super trendy and knows every nightclub around!!! Also Im in pretty decent admin work and doubt he'd believe id be doing it!!

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    If all else fails, honesty is the best policy..I understand that you want some things to be private but its just your job! Where as dancing might not be a normal job in the standard definition, to us who do it, it seems pretty normal...just tell them you are dancing...no need to tell where.

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Im juggling reg nice office job too, and so going out til 4am is now gonna seem a bit odd!! Cant say im oput clubbing, everytime leaving a with a big bag!!!

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Like I said. You are a dancer, be honest about it. That sounds like your only option.

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    i dont want my housemate to see me in anyway a sexual connotation!!

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    I dont think that just because they know you dance, will make them look at you any different...plus if its a guy chances are he prolly already looks at you in a sexual way, thats what guys do.

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    God/dess phillyvixen's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    I disagree, I think it changes the way people percieve me once i tell them.
    I'm a new dancer and also struggle with how to explain my hours.
    First of all i HATE lying! Absolutly hate it.
    I told my family I'm bartending to explain why I'm always out so late the night before i see them. But i told my personal trainer that I dance to explain why I'm dieting and working so hard and it totally made him feel like it was ok to make sexual comments. (i've explained that it is NOT)
    But even when i meet new people it gets ackward. And i feel like their whole deminor (sp) changes if i do tell them. Like i'm suddenly a different person. I am no longer myself I am a Stripper and everything that comes with it. (Which is things for everyone, some people think oh she must be an animal in bed and some think she must be a junkie)
    I graduated college with a degree in graphic design so i can easily say I do free lance design but that dosen't explain why I can't go out any weekend night until after 2am. Its a tough call. Bartending seems to be the best cover until they want to know where and come see you at work. Bleh If people weren't so closed minded to begin with it wouldn't even matter.

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    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    bartending has worked for years for me. but the other downside to that lie is that bartenders carry cash. that worries me. I have to disagree echo, my feeling is very similar to phillyvixen's and find that when i *do* tell people, some see me more sexually, and i can feel it in the air, in the way they look at me. and that's NOT ok. there are some that don't because they are more open to it, but even my one cousin that does, makes inappropriate comments like (when it comes to paying for something) "yea just fish some ones out of your g!" and im like, yo... not cool. anyways i digress... bartending. (sorry im rambling, im hyper tonight!)

    Love it!

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Well I am very aware of the stereotypes and everything else that people associate with dancers but IMO *some* people will try anything with anyone if they think they can get away with it, regardless of what your job is. Think of the boss and the harrassed secretary scenario...shes not a stripper or a hooker or anything that would be perceived as sexual yet the boss still feels its ok to do innapropriate things to her...personally I think no matter what you do for a job if you are assertive and let people know in no uncertain terms that treating you in said manner will not fly, then they wont do it. If they still do, then really why are you hanging around them in the first place? If its a stranger, no I wont tell them I dance because its none of their fucking business but when it comes to friends and in the OP case her flatmates, of course I would tell them. I have lost friends due to the fact that I dance so I know very well the stereotypes that people assume when you tell them your profession, but as I was told by many a SW member, if they are that shallow then fuck them. Anyway this is just me personally, to each their own...

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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Tell people your a stocker at a grocery store. They work through the night so all the foods there for people during the day. If for some reason they come to see you, you can tell them you were in the back. The people who stock different parts of the store dont know the other sections workers, so if they ask some one working there and they look clueless...it wont give you away, no one knows anyone anyways. Can you tell im a grocery store stocker? ahah I doubt anyones going to be too interested in asking you about a grocery store job like they may be about a waitressing one, ass long as they dont see you come home with 400 bucks a night, your all good.

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    Senior Member Sirena's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Or you could tell a half truth and say yes, you work at your stripclub but only as a bartender/cocktail waitress etc.

    That way it's still specific but not as...sexual as saying you are a dancer there. And the only way they would find out is if they visit you at work. In which case you get to grill them
    "Mix well the sperm of four men"
    Anais Nin on the recipe for happiness

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    How can I put this,...? I am a graduate with a history of high profile office type jobs and he simply wont believe Im stocking shelves, waiting..... He is quite snobby anyway!! I need a plausible explanatin. A couple of nights out is explainable but all the time...? He knows I'm no party animal!!

  15. #15
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    If he's snobby then why do you bother anyways? Who cares what he thinks? Tell him the truth; it seems to be the only thing that WILL work for you if all of the other suggestions that are being given don't work for you. I think the best ones most girls used have been given to you. Your call.

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    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    well, you could say you are bartending, your friend's cousin worked in a bar and they had a spot for an extra bartender and willshow you the ropes etc but the downside is that it's in a strip club and you know he will never come to see you but thankfully it's only 3 shifts a week and the money is damn great.

    put the idea in his head that even if he had thought he wanted to, he doesn't want to see you. therefore your little lie is somewhat safe. (i used, "you dont want to see me with my tits all hiked up in a corset!" to my parents, to which they said, oh god no.)

    Love it!

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    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    I dont care what he thinks i just dont him thinking of me in that way! We live together!
    I could try the bartending thing but if you knew me it just isn't likely!! And also he's sucha barfly he knows every club/bar in Town!

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    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Yeah you are shooting down every suggestion we give you. What do *YOU* want to tell him you do? If he is a barfly like you said, he will eventually figure out where you are working and then you will just look like a liar. If he isnt really that big of a stripclub type barfly, then do what everyone else has said and say you are a waitress or a bartender.

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    Member Piper_Eve's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    How can I put this,...? I am a graduate with a history of high profile office type jobs and he simply wont believe Im stocking shelves, waiting..... He is quite snobby anyway!! I need a plausible explanatin. A couple of nights out is explainable but all the time...? He knows I'm no party animal!!
    What if you said you were managing a club?
    Was DestyDoll, just changed to keep up with my new dance name.

  20. #20
    Veteran Member Tallulah's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    he is getting on my nerves now, so i dont care!! Im out before he gets home from work and creep in when he is in bed so he prob doesn even notice!!

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    Banned LatinaRose's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Cally View Post
    Your a waitress/shootergirl/bartender whatever...

    In Toronto there is an agency that has hires out shooter girls to different clubs every night. Usually your not at the same club two nights in a row. So I just tell people I work as a shooter girl

    See if there is something like that in your area... otherwise just pick some small bar and say you work there.. or hey, just be honest
    Hey Cally, can you pm me this agency??

  22. #22
    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: where am I?!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Tallulah View Post
    he is getting on my nerves now, so I don't care!! I'm out before he gets home from work and creep in when he is in bed so he prob doesn't even notice!!
    I like that one the best. If he starts pushing for info, a perfect response to his questions is "Why do you want to know?"
    The ultimate answer is because he is nosy and getting into your business. No matter how he phrases it, that is the real reason why he is probing into your private life. If he is unrelenting say something so totally off the wall that he will not question you again.

    * You took a job at animal control and work nights catching stray dogs.
    * The new satanic cult you joined has all these late night cemetery meetings.
    * Working as a burglar is profitable, but the working hours are crappy.
    * Say you've been doing ride alongs with this super cute state patrolman.
    * Selling coke and weed at parties in wealthy neighborhoods.
    * You're on stake out for the FBI with Jack Bauer.
    * You're hooked on LAN competitions and you're actually making decent money at it.
    * Texas Hold 'em. Nuff said.
    * He'll know exactly what you've been doing, AFTER you get nominated for the Pulitzer Prize. Until then you can't reveal your sources.
    * You're helping prisoners with their conjugal visitation rights. Nothing like a no-strings relationship.
    * You're actually a member of a sleeper cell and you have to be ready for an impending 'event'.
    * You prefer not to talk about your super-hero alter ego.
    * You think you are being abducted by aliens, but you never actually remember the abductions. You just have this 'missing time'...
    * Grand Theft Auto. This time it's for real.
    * You're a high paid call girl entertaining the rich and famous.
    * you've been recruited by the psychic friends network as your natural psychic talent is so accurate.
    * Catholicism conversation classes require the attendance of midnight mass several times a week. Eventually you hope to take the vows as a nun.
    * The hobby of entomology requires a lot of nighttime observation of unique species.

    Or some other equally silly statement. After throwing around these whoppers you can sneak in a stripper comment and he'll think you are again yanking his chain.

    * Hey, they needed more dancers at Deja Vu, and well, your just so hot and sexy you had to take the job...


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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