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Thread: How to Say No

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    Default How to Say No

    Girls - If I am at a club that is a little slow and I am getting many "would you like a dance" propositions, what response do you prefer?

    - Just a simple no thanks.
    - No thanks with some kind of explanation, ie, "just got back from a dance"
    - "You are very pretty, but not right now"

    It is difficult when a girl sits down and starts a conversation. If I don't want a dance from her, I hate to reject her asap and have her get up, but I would also hate to have her waste time chatting me up when I am going to say no.

  2. #2
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    You don't owe us an explanation, and giving a dancer an explanation is just wasting her time.

  3. #3
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    A simple no thanks is perfect. I'm more of a wannadance type of girl, so any explaination goes in one ear and out the other. If you're not gonna buy a dance from me, I could care less if you just got one or if you think I'm very pretty. Oh, and if you're the type that feels that you need to touch any part of my body (hand, arm, leg...) while turning me down for a dance, you should know that not only is that not necessary, it's rude and annoying.

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    God/dess Chrissy68's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    yea, unless you are wanting the girl to *really* come back later, don't explain, just say, no thanks or not right now. if you want her to come back, tell her that she shoudl come back later but right now you are settling in.

    Love it!

  5. #5
    Banned Helle's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Yeah, 'No Thanks' is good. Just smile and make eye contact so we know you don't hate us. Don't use the maybe later bs unless you really are considering or feeling out the situation.

    I went up to two customers sitting together yesterday...
    Me: Hi! I'm Zoey... How are you two tonight??"
    Guy: Don't bother. We're broke.

    That is not the way to do it :p

  6. #6
    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Well if you definately arent planning on getting a dance from her, just tell her "No thanks". No explanation is needed, no compliments are necessary-just dont bullshit us. Explaining yourself just makes you look like a liar, and complimenting us just seems like you are trying to make us feel better...

    Ima stick with Barbara Bush - Just say no!

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by echomadison View Post
    Well if you definately arent planning on getting a dance from her, just tell her "No thanks". No explanation is needed, no compliments are necessary-just dont bullshit us. Explaining yourself just makes you look like a liar, and complimenting us just seems like you are trying to make us feel better...

    Ima stick with Barbara Bush - Just say no!
    Exactly. I dont need someone to patronize me. Just smile and say no thank you.

    and "just say no" was Nancy Reagan...just FYI.
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
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    Featured Member Lyssa Lynn's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon View Post
    A simple no thanks is perfect. I'm more of a wannadance type of girl, so any explaination goes in one ear and out the other. If you're not gonna buy a dance from me, I could care less if you just got one or if you think I'm very pretty. Oh, and if you're the type that feels that you need to touch any part of my body (hand, arm, leg...) while turning me down for a dance, you should know that not only is that not necessary, it's rude and annoying.
    AMEN! I second this 100%.

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    Featured Member flickad's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    An honest but polite one. 'No thanks' is fine. Don't say 'maybe later' unless you mean it. I'll reiterate what others said, that you don't really owe anyone an explanation. Only explain yourself (by for example saying that you just had a dance) if you would like a dance from this particular girl later, because explaining yourself in this way implies that she should ask you again later on.

  10. #10
    Featured Member CalifSCVisitor65's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    I wish some dancers would understand the "no thanks" phrase. I had a dancer recently keep badgering by asking "why am I not your type?" and etc.

    I told her "correct you're not my type", but that still didn't seem to satisfy her.

    She finally left, but about 30 mins later found me again and was still trying to convince me.

    Oh ladies when we say "you're not my type" please don't ask "what is your type then." If I wanted your help getting a dancer that was my type, I would have asked for your help. Many times, my vision of my type and the dancer's vision of my type may not coincide.

  11. #11
    God/dess Bob_Loblaw's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    A polite "no thanks" works best for me but I agree with CalifSCVisitor65. There are some dancers who insist on an explanation. There's nothing that I could say that wouldn't come across as CS at this point.

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    Default Re: How to Say No

    ^ I know a few dancers like that....don't sweat it, they drive me batty. I like a simple No thank you. Easy, Done.

    And if you change your mind later, come and get me. I might pass by someone that gave me a No thank you earlier and smile, reminding him that I am around...



    "What?! What do you mean No?! Why not?! Am I not hot? You think I'm ugly? Is that what you're telling me? That I'm Ugly and fat? I am going to tell the bouncer that you said I was ugly and fat!"

    (I actually witnessed this one time....spooky)




  13. #13
    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by cameronfl View Post
    Exactly. I dont need someone to patronize me. Just smile and say no thank you.

    and "just say no" was Nancy Reagan...just FYI.
    Oh yeah! DUH! Nancy Reagan...

  14. #14
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    lol. I ask why not sometimes.... but only if I'm already in a shit mood. IDK, sometimes guys give in and get one (or more!).

    I know, not the best thing to do, but wtf.... it's not like I'd lose anything by trying.

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by Lola Rose View Post
    lol. I ask why not sometimes.... but only if I'm already in a shit mood. IDK, sometimes guys give in and get one (or more!).

    I know, not the best thing to do, but wtf.... it's not like I'd lose anything by trying.
    I do too....esp if I'm just in the mood to screw with them! yeah..I admit it..I'm a bitch!
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
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  16. #16
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    represent!
    Quote Originally Posted by cameronfl View Post
    I do too....esp if I'm just in the mood to screw with them! yeah..I admit it..I'm a bitch!

  17. #17
    God/dess Corgan's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon View Post
    Oh, and if you're the type that feels that you need to touch any part of my body (hand, arm, leg...) while turning me down for a dance, you should know that not only is that not necessary, it's rude and annoying.
    aaaaaaaaamen.

  18. #18
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    I never ask "why not?" coz I don't want to know. I'm a bit sensitive so I prefer to stay in a positive mood and having someone say something potentially hurtful to me might hurt my hustle.

    Please don't let the dancer start working the hustle on you before saying no, not only is it wasting our time but (for me at least), it becomes emotionally draining to give guys the hustle spiel all night so I would prefer them to immediately andpolitely tell me that they are not interested in getting a dance.

    For example last night I sat down next to a man asked introduced myself, he introduced himself and then he said "I am about the leave so don't waste your time with me hun". Now he said it very nicely and then I thanked him for letting me know because I do appreciate this.

  19. #19
    Kaylinn
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    I went up to this asian guy the other night and introduced myself, and he was very polite and said Im sorry, your very beautiful, but I really perfer asian girls, so I dont want to waste your time.
    Thats fine by me. I know everyone has their perfrences. It dont hurt my feelings. He was very polite about it and I appriciated that, so I offered to send over an asian girl if I saw one.

    Please don't let the dancer start working the hustle on you before saying no, not only is it wasting our time but (for me at least), it becomes emotionally draining to give guys the hustle spiel all night so I would prefer them to immediately andpolitely tell me that they are not interested in getting a dance.
    And although I agree with this, the most annoyign thing to me is when I wlk up to a guy and say Hi, how are you?, and he says no thanks. I look at him dumbly and say..uhh, what are you not thanking me for? I was just asking how your night was. No need to be rude. Say "my night is going great thanks, but I dont want company now".

    Some girls you really cant be polite with tho. My boyfriend and I were at a club a few weeks ago, and this girl walked up and said want a dance?
    We said no thank you. She said, "well...are you sure?" We said, "yes we are sure." She said, "well...want company anyway?" We said "no thank you, we are fine." She said, "are you sure?" YES WE ARE SURE we dont want a dance!! She actually said to us...well, ok, I will check back in a few. 5 minutes later!! wanna dance now? no? are you sure? are you sure your sure?? OMG. I was ready to say how much to make you go away?

  20. #20
    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
    ^ I know a few dancers like that....don't sweat it, they drive me batty. I like a simple No thank you. Easy, Done.

    And if you change your mind later, come and get me. I might pass by someone that gave me a No thank you earlier and smile, reminding him that I am around...



    "What?! What do you mean No?! Why not?! Am I not hot? You think I'm ugly? Is that what you're telling me? That I'm Ugly and fat? I am going to tell the bouncer that you said I was ugly and fat!"

    (I actually witnessed this one time....spooky)
    Oh, sorry, you saw that? I was just having a rough day....

    Haha, I'm kidding of course - as long as it's not the type as afore mentioned that before you even get close enough that a customer knows you're going to say "hi.." They wave their hands and go Nooo thanks! Thats uber annoying. A polite, eye contact, smile "No, but thank you" kind of response is not considered rude by most *normal* dancers.

  21. #21
    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by jannisary View Post
    I see what you mean JZ but for me it would depend on the dancer's attitude when screwing with me. If its a good natured, sexy, or even a bit "naughty" SS screwing with then I might roll with it and send some CS back at her. It can be fun and might even result in me changing my mind especially if she uses that time to show me some sexy personality.

    On the other hand if the dancer gets all sour and bitchy and gets in my face well then we would have a problem.
    Exactly! It all depends on how the guy said no....if he was nasty about it he gets the BITCH...if he was cool...he gets the sexy smartass...which has changed quite a few minds over the yrs!!

    And if my screwing with you is enough to get you to leave...then you most likely werent going to be of any use to me anyway so i dont care.
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
    -- Anna Nicole Smith

    Myspace is an obsession...much like Stripperweb...
    http://www.myspace.com/cameronkeys (real myspace)

    http://www.myspace.com/sexyhotdancer(work myspace)


    Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

  22. #22
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    Post Re: How to Say No

    From my experience as a patron, just say the following:
    1. No thank you (if your not gonna get a dance from her that night)
    2. Not now but later, thanks. (make sure you do get that dance later)
    *Good Luck

  23. #23
    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    as others have said, do NOT say anything like "maybe later" unless you mean it. it's incredibly annoying. other than that, just be polite and say no, thanx. you can compliment her if you want, but you don't "have" to.

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    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Let's say I walk onto a club and just as I sit a dancer approaches with "wanna dance?" Well, hell. I am not so impatient or desperate that her 'siren song' entrances me. Even if I am attracted to her from I will say "just got here; give me a few minutes to settle in and look around." Generally I get dances from a few dancers, but I want to choose them myself after I look around.

    I agree it works out better, generally, to just say 'no' when you mean no. If I get comments on my 'no', I usually explain I want to see who I may be interested in. If I am turned off, I may say I'm not here for VIPs tonight. If I get one later with another, well, she may get the hint.

    Generally I prefer to be the asker. The cutest club I ever went to was in BFLO NY and is gone now (Diamond Dust). They only did stage dances topless with no tip rail. Custys would go to the stage and drop a few bills. Later the dancer would make rounds in the club to thank those who tipped her. They would give each tipper a cheek kiss, say a few words and leave. There was no VIP area or table dances, though the dancers sometime would stay a few minutes after their rounds for some talking. Maybe this wasn't aggressive enough to survive into today's world, but I did like it quite a bit.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: How to Say No

    Quote Originally Posted by Helle View Post
    Yeah, 'No Thanks' is good. Just smile and make eye contact so we know you don't hate us. Don't use the maybe later bs unless you really are considering or feeling out the situation.

    I went up to two customers sitting together yesterday...
    Me: Hi! I'm Zoey... How are you two tonight??"
    Guy: Don't bother. We're broke.

    That is not the way to do it :p
    Esp if they then get up and get dances with someone else, just might cause me to suddenly become extremely clumsy and spill a drink on you!

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