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Thread: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Hi there. I was at a club that I pop into now and then on my way home the other night, and there's a dancer who works there that I've talked to a couple times in the past when I was there. She's a cute girl, and she's very nice and I just enjoy talking with her, so I was there for about 5 hours the other night chatting with her in between the times she had to go on stage, and one time she was on the small second stage and it was full...probably about 15 people, so, I went up to the stage and gave her $20 and told her it was for everyone at the stage (which a couple customers really appreciated) So, after she got off the stage, she came back to where I was sitting and sat down and we started talking again, and she starts rummaging through her purse and she says to me "I have $20 for you." So, naturally, I was kinda shocked and said "What??" So, again she says "I have $20 for you....you put $20 up there." I tried to explain to her that it was for everyone at the stage, but she told me she felt bad because everyone was already putting up money. So, I told her that I couldn't accept it back. "This is what you do for a living" I told her. I mean, I have a great time talking with her and watching her dance, so, what's wrong with supporting her efforts with a few bucks?? Am I wrong about this?? And later that night I was going to grab her and I a drink and she offered to pay. Naturally, I refused. I don't like the idea of her feeling bad about it, but I'm just there to have a good time and she's there trying to make some money to support her kids. There's NO WAY I could bring myself to take money from her. Any thoughts on this?? Am I wrong??

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    You arent friends OTC? If you are...it's understandable..I woudl feel wierd taking money from friends. If you are not...yeah, kinda wierd...
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    No, we're not friends OTC...She's told me quite a bit about her life, and I've learned a pretty good deal about her from the few times I've talked to her, but nothing OTC.

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Hmmmm...that's weird. I've only given money back when the customer is being rude and I don't want his tip or if the tip was conditional on some other awful request, like, "beat my friend with this belt", or something.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    hi boondock, good to see u. you'll hopefully know me from another forum

    I've gone to support my OTC friends before. Some of them I know from university before discovering their job and it sure feels weird. I tell them they're allowed to charge me less but I insist on paying them because they are in my eyes a professional and a self respecting professional wouldn't give away their services free. They know I even charge my family for lessons though I charge them less.

    That said, not everyboyd at a club is there solely or primarily to make money. It's hard to believe, but some girls don't see themselves so professionally. Perhaps she has a day job? I guess if you've made yourself clear that you expect her to be paid for what she does and she's happier if you don't there isn't a problem

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    Veteran Member datchapin's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    You shouldn't feel bad about it. She's being kind to you in her gestures and rejecting that kindness is what I find odd. She should know how much money she needs and if she feels comfortable giving you money it's because she has enough to do so.
    The more I see, the less I know, the more I like to let it go! - RHCP

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Quote Originally Posted by BoondockSaint View Post
    so I was there for about 5 hours the other night chatting with her in between the times she had to go on stage
    The only thing that u did wrong was to take up that much of her time, not buy a dance and offer everyone on the stage $20 between them.
    You should have been paying her for her time between stage sets when she could have been getting dances.

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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Thanks for all the feedback everyone. Let me see if I can clear some things up. Salsa4Ever, I asked her if she had a day job, and she said that she didn't. Jaizaine, I was up at the stage everytime she was on it putting up some bucks, just that one time the stage was full. I asked her numerous times if I was keeping her from from doing her job, and she always told me no. There was even one time that she had an offer from one guy for some private dances, and I told her "well, go do you're thing then." And she said she didn't want to. At the stage once she was wrapping things up and pointed back to where we were sitting before she had gone on stage and said "I'm gonna come hang out with you." And then she went outside to have a cigarette, and told me "don't leave." She never once asked me if I wanted to go have a dance (which every other girl there did) And, I just feel like it's kinda 'too forward' to ask. I don't know, I'm not a SC expert by any means, so maybe you can shed some light. Again, thank you for the thoughts everyone. I welcome many more.

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Well that girl is in the wrong line of business if she cares that little about making money. I don't care how interesting a guy is (which doesnt often happen at my club) i won't sacrifice my money for anyone and you WILL pay me for my time or I will go out the back and daydream, chat to the other dancers or eat. I don't give up my time for free when I'm at work and I hate it when other dancers do coz it ruins the club.

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    Featured Member teeth_of_the_hydra's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Hmm, is she new? It sounds like she might be doing that amateur thing that some girls do, before they realize that time = money ALWAYS. That's the only thought I have.

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    Veteran Member The one and only Raven's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Hmm... odd.... Maybe she thought you made a mistake and tipped her the wrong bill? Maybe she was trying to be honest. Do you usually tip her $20s?

    Krystal

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    She might be new and it may not be a good "business practice" but I'll bet she makes more money from BDS for her attitude. She sounds like a keeper to me.

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    well.. the only time i'll give money back is if someone is being really rude and gives me the tip like its charity..but in that situation i would like throw it back at him and walk away.
    OR
    if i know the guy is a big spender and the type of guy who comes to the club cuz he's lonely and wants to talk to a nice girl. there I see a potential regular in the making and if he tips me i'll usually refuse to take it which he'll respond by either making me take it, or taking it back but tipping me more later cuz he thinks im not a money hungry gold digger.

    i mean yeah.. SOME times.. like.. once in a blue moon i'll feel bad for taking a big tip from someone I dont know.. but thats usually if they're really drunk or i'm really misleading them...then I guess i'll feel bad...

    otherwise I dont see why she wouldnt take it..

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    I had a girl give some money back one time, I think she felt sorry for me. I was at a club in FL. It was an all nude place, they had a deal of two songs in a private room for $75. When we went back there we were waiting for the next song to start so we just talked for a minute. She asked some questions and I began to tell her about my girl back home (a stripper), I know big dumb mistake. Well we kept talking and the next thing you know the two songs were over and she hadn't danced. She handed me $25 and said (with a smile) you don't just like pretty girls, you love that pretty girl. I felt better and I don't think she would have given me the money back if I had offended her.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Something isn't sitting right at this thread. EVERY TIME I read it I notice my eyebrow going higher and higher.

    Here's a guy, forcing money on a dancer. The dancer is refusing money from him at every turn. INCLUDING from other potential patrons. This guy is acting (not saying it doesn't happen) that he's pushing her every advance off with job suggestions while she's just looking to throw her not-earned money in her unpaid time with him.

    This just strikes me as a lot of BS. No Offense. I am SURE it is out there.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    ^^ yeah I'm with you....I'm calling shenanigans on this one....it's either BS, there's WAY more to the story or she's a whackjob....
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    Here's a guy, forcing money on a dancer. The dancer is refusing money from him at every turn. INCLUDING from other potential patrons. This guy is acting (not saying it doesn't happen) that he's pushing her every advance off with job suggestions while she's just looking to throw her not-earned money in her unpaid time with him.
    Mastridonicus...I appoligize for sounding kinda stupid here, but, I'm not sure I'm understanding what you're saying.

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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Cameronfl...What is it that you think is BS? I would be more than happy to clear anything up that you have questions about. I was just kinda intrigued by what had happened that night, and not really being a SC connoisseur, I'm just trying to learn from some of you out there that are more experienced than I.

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    I cant imagine going into the club, hanging out for any length of time with someone I am not OTC friends with for free, while turning down money from both him and other guys....esp. to the point where I wont even let him buy me a drink and insteads try to buy one for HIM.

    The whole point of being there, like any job is to make money. So why would she be there if she is doing everything in her power to NOT make money? It doesnt add up...thats why I said either this is complete BS (on your part OR hers....maybe she is grooming you for some big payoff...who knows) or shes insane.

    And if everyone at the stage was already tipping her...why did you tip "for them"?? I could understand if nobody was tipping..as in "I'll give her money FOR you, you bunch of cheap a-holes"...but if that wasnt the case...what was the point?
    People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars.
    -- Anna Nicole Smith

    Myspace is an obsession...much like Stripperweb...
    http://www.myspace.com/cameronkeys (real myspace)

    http://www.myspace.com/sexyhotdancer(work myspace)


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    Member BoondockSaint's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Well, I'm just telling you what happened. There's no BS on my part. As far as the tipping goes, I just like to see everyone having a good time, plus, you know how some of these people tip...a buck?! What the hell is that?! I'm sorry if it sounds odd to you, but that's really what happened.

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    I can see it happening. Some stupid bitches just don't know how to make money and make the rest of us "evil hustlers" look bad just for doing our job.

    This is where management needs to come in and train the girls to be more professional.

    If you're young, personable, and attractive stripper, its easy to make good money on a busy night. She's coasting off of that, and probably comfortable making nothing on off nights. Bottom line she is barely making more than she would be at a store in the mall, and is content with that for her and her children. Dumbass.

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Quote Originally Posted by BoondockSaint View Post
    Mastridonicus...I appoligize for sounding kinda stupid here, but, I'm not sure I'm understanding what you're saying.
    Don't sweat me bro, I'm not saying it's NOT true. I'm just reading this like you're trying to get us to say she likes you.

    And if all this is 100% true, she probably does.

    Psychoanalyzing spilled milk about it will get us no where. What I CAN say is that if this is 100% true, and we'll assume it is, you need to distance yourself. This girl is going to work and choosing not to make any money over your time, with no as-yet interest of taking it above and beyond. I would be very wary of when the other shoe drops and she either hits you with a "You owe me" or becomes very very clingy in a good way at first, but borderline obsessive.

    I believe there is more to the story, like maybe the place is dead, or she does high volumes and prefers to keep your and her's non business for whatever reason...but or maybe you're giving us an instant that you noticed, not the other times she's went off and danced. I mean if I buy a chick 15 rounds a night and she buys me one, guess which one I remember more?

    If I were you, I'd straight up ask.
    Last edited by Mastridonicus; 01-17-2007 at 08:37 PM.
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    Well, thank you for your perspective Katrine. Mastridonicus....LOL...No, no, no, I'm well aware that she doesn't "like" me. I'm not exactly very popular with the ladies, if you know what I mean...especially ones that so many guys in a week, I would probably lose count. It was a Saturday night, and it was pretty steadily busy the whole time I was there. Busier later on in the night naturally. As far as volume, I don't even know what kind of volume she does, as I'm not really there that frequently. Thanks for your perspective, it is much appreciated. Oh, but just one question....you said "If I were you, I'd straight up ask." Ask what?

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    I AM SERIOUSLY trying to beat the shit out of my MISUSE OF THOSE WORDS


    ANYWAYS

    I just mean, when I am in the midst of a situation like that... I'm a tool, and I lack "inner conversations" so I basically end up asking "Why are you refusing money hun?"
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    Default Re: What if a dancer tries to give you money back?

    She is new, young, and she has a crush on you b/c you are the nice guy.

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