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Thread: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

  1. #1
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Old story. We were very close, now we're not. We were tight friends while she was single, then she found a spectacular and quite serious new boyfriend. I felt, irrationally, used and abandoned when she increasingly distanced herself. We argued about it briefly.

    So it has been a month. Objectively, I know the friendship is over. Our last encounter felt very much like a goodbye.

    I miss her terribly.

    Right now I'm fighting the urge to shoot her an e-mail. (Long ago deleted her number from my phone, eliminating the potential for drunk txting.)

    Any advice on how to get through this uncomfortable period?

  2. #2
    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Why would she dump a friend just because she got a boyfriend? My advice... go make a new friend or two.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Daniela's Avatar
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    Default Re: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella21 View Post
    Why would she dump a friend just because she got a boyfriend? My advice... go make a new friend or two.
    yea!


    You need to figure out what the hell you want, CE. The only time I would be that upset over a "friendship" break up, is if I secretly wanted to be with them, but masked it as a friendship. What is it called, a crush?

    Get over her like you're getting over an ex...(keep busy, make some changes, have rebound sex, or go to a SC and get you're ego stroked..etc)

    It will pass, it always does..

  4. #4
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Quote Originally Posted by Daniela View Post
    yea!


    You need to figure out what the hell you want, CE. The only time I would be that upset over a "friendship" break up, is if I secretly wanted to be with them, but masked it as a friendship. What is it called, a crush?
    Guilty as charged, I guess. I declare this thread closed.

  5. #5
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Quote Originally Posted by Daniela View Post
    yea!


    You need to figure out what the hell you want, CE. The only time I would be that upset over a "friendship" break up, is if I secretly wanted to be with them, but masked it as a friendship. What is it called, a crush?

    Get over her like you're getting over an ex...(keep busy, make some changes, have rebound sex, or go to a SC and get you're ego stroked..etc)

    It will pass, it always does..
    While CE's last post was indicative to your theory, he DID say they were close friends. It IS possible for a man and a woman to be close friends and not want each other.

    I know that CE confirmed you were right, but I just had to put that out there.

  6. #6
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: When you want to get back in touch and know you should not

    Chi, I already gave you advice on this. You two were never friends, you were using your typical weasly "nice-guy" approach to get in with her. Not in her pants, I understand you genuinly liked the girl. But she wasn't into you, so you got stuck with "friend" status because she likes you as a friend too.

    But what both of you did by staying friends is wrong. She benefitted from your generous attention, and you got to keep pining for her at a close distance. The emotions never had a chance to settle.

    If you two were truly friends, you still would be. Use this as an opportunity to let the lust chemicals die down. Just don't call her. Slam your foot in the door if you have to, and let it remind you of that pit you felt in your stomach when you realized you were unrequited.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

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    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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