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Thread: i feel Violated and Disgusted

  1. #1
    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default i feel Violated and Disgusted

    God tonight was awful.... At the end of the night some guy wanted to do a private room for a half hour... When the bouncer came over to tell him the prices and the 10% charge of the room he started complaining about the extra charge and what not.... I was getting bad vibes just from that.. So we go upstairs, I start my first dance and he started unbuckling his belt and and told me to play with "it".. i looked at him and said "im not that kind of girl, sorry, what did u think you were going to get when u went up here" He started laughing and said, "i think we're done"... He ended up leaving and I got my money... but it makes me feel so gross... In addition to that, during the three dances before he left, he grabbed myu boobs, and tried to put his hands on my thong.... It just is very upsetting and disturbing.. I hope i don't look back when i get out of the dancing business and need therapy because of people like this.... I thank god for my regular, whom i have nothing to worry about when he comes in.... Hopefully tomorrow will be a new day and I'll forget about it.... Sorry for my rambling.....I hope you girls had a better night than I did!!!

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    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Tomorrow will be a better day. At least you got your money.I'm sorry you had to deal with such a dickhead. ::hugs:: Remember that it is not a reflection of you. It's a reflection of him. Was there a bouncer nearby during all of this? What nerve that guy has. Geez.
    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    Maria Callas said it best: "When my critics stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping."

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    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Tomorrow will be a better day. At least you got your money.I'm sorry you had to deal with such a dickhead. ::hugs:: Remember that it is not a reflection of you. It's a reflection of him. Was there a bouncer nearby during all of this? What nerve that guy has. Geez.
    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    Maria Callas said it best: "When my critics stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping."

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    This is why the people who say it's not the customers' fault the industry is so fucked up, as far as dancers being insulted by this behavior, are full of shit.

    I have dealt with women fresh out of these situations more times than I care to think about, and it never fails to piss me off. Most of the time I have to reassure the woman as best I can and go on and put on a show, stifling my disgust.

    It was way, way worse in Daytona--fortunately this sort of thing is strictly forbidden in my new club, but we still get the insulting behavior from some customers, who insist on treating dancers as prostitutes.

    Men like these are attempting to dehumanize dancers, make no mistake about it. They are scum.

    Sorry you had to go through that...
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    ^^I wish you were my DJ...

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Total agreement here re customer attitudes / expectations. However, there's also no denying that this sort of customer comprises a higher and higher percentage of total dollars being spent in many clubs these days.

    Also, thanks to the existance of strip club review websites, this particular customer now has the ability to inform other potential customers that you are (in his warped opinion) an R.O.B. In one way this could be good because other customers who are also interested in 'maximum mileage' will tend to stay away from 'bothering' you in a similar manner. But in another way this could be bad because other customers could be less willing to buy private dances from you after reading posts about you on strip club review websites ... with or without having 'maximum mileage' expectations.

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    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Wow.. I got a similiar guy on Wednesday night. He did dehumanise me. This was one of the reasons I was so hesitant in starting back lap dancing locally where the customer is allowed to touch you.... he did use me as a piece of meat... piece of mastabatory meat... he was humping/grinding my lower back... just the way he was grabbing/fondling me.

    He didn't hurt me thankfully so he paid attention to my rule "please be gentle as I am a woman and do feel pain" however at the same time i couldn't have been more bored and digusted with him.

    Other than that one customer all the rest were fab! It's a shame how the minority wreck it as it does take alot of "bounce back" from a horrid experience.

    Goodness, it took me quite awhile to bounce back from an experience I had in the VIP of a certain club in Adelaide when I worked there. I actually was physically ill whenever I re-thought about the event. These days I am fine and it is hazy tho' i do remember what happened (the guy took his dick out and started masturbating basically).


    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

  8. #8
    Pamela
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    You will be fine hun. My very first ld i was 21, (won a contest at Pure Platinum in Lauderdale, offered a job) and did not know what the hell to actually do. My FIRST friggin customer tried to put his fingers inside me....UGH.

    I stopped doing ld's for years. Hell i was scared. Then got back into it with an attitude. You are not the first. And it may happen again. Just stand your ground as you did, and tell him to go back to hell!

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Quote Originally Posted by Melonie View Post
    Also, thanks to the existance of strip club review websites, this particular customer now has the ability to inform other potential customers that you are (in his warped opinion) an R.O.B. In one way this could be good because other customers who are also interested in 'maximum mileage' will tend to stay away from 'bothering' you in a similar manner.
    Nah, screw that, they're best to stay away from her.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    God/dess twisterinAZ's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

    I hope you were a total bitch to him in the end. I always wonder if customers forget that we are people too. Sorry love.

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    I'm so sorry, girl. Just chock this one up to experience and use it as a story to shock people in the future. If nothing else, working as a stripper makes for some great story telling.

    Be at peace and relax. If you dwell on the nastiness, you are allowing him to violate you over and over in your mind. Write off the whole situation as unintended nastiness, and then forget about it and move on. Every time the situation pops up in your mind, push it out and think of something nice instead. I like to think of Johnny Depp at those times (drool). Or maybe a nice big bite of tiramisu.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Shock story? Wow. I got so used to that kind of thing I just accepted it as the norm.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  13. #13
    smartcookie
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Unless the club is specifically known for it, I really don't feel that strip club message boards make a discernable difference in a non-extras stripper's earnings at all. Not worth losing sleep over it.

    Sorry for what happened, though.

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    Veteran Member miss cleo's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    There do seem to be more and more of these assholes around and they 're begining to bother me more and more. I really hate men now and it's exactly because of this type of customer, and you see them and half of them have wedding rings on and you wonder if this is what all men are really like, all it takes is a couple of drinks to turn them into cavemen.

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    Veteran Member pipermarau's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    tonight i was sitting with an amazing bachelor, his married friend knew i was his fav and only dancer for the night so at the end he wanted to buy him a dance and was trying to get me to do it "special" asking me what i have to offer this time, how will i make it special, etc. he may as well have groped me with those words. rather than feeling upset about it i looked him dead in the eye and said:

    "as a stripper in the biz for three years, i am surprised to say this, but after all i have already seen, you just offended me. you have barely spoken to me all night and now you treat me like some whore? i don't like you and i have been having a GREAT time with your friend and if you want, you can keep talking and i'll try to pretend that i give a shit."

    then i sat on the bachelor and we went to do a dance. he was happy with my acrobatic one way touching dances he had been getting all night long and was proud of me for standing up to him. the next time that happens to you (alone in vip or at a full table) just check him. let him know that you are there to make money and give great sexy clean dances, that you are shocked and offended and that there are better and nicer people who are dying to see you waiting. let him know he is clearly not worth your time and if he wants to get VD he's on the right path but that you appreciate the $$ and would rather not have to spend it on valtrex.

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    Senior Member noctina's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    girl, i know how you feel.

    i was doing a dance and i slid all sexily down the guys body and then looked up at him, and he whipped out his dick RIGHT IN MY FACE and it touched my face... i SCREAMED and jumped up and punched the guy in the side of the head, the bouncer came in and the guy was sitting there with his dick out so he got kicked out of the club thankfully. i felt so fucking violated, he was lucky i didn't punch him in the crotch, but i didn't wanna have to touch it. it was a black guy too, and i'm not racist but i've never been with a black man before and never saw a black man's dick in my life. it was a monstrosity. so i was just so completely freaked out and traumatized. if i ever saw that guy again, i would beat the shit out of him.
    hits from the boooong

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Quote Originally Posted by noctina View Post
    girl, i know how you feel.

    i was doing a dance and i slid all sexily down the guys body and then looked up at him, and he whipped out his dick RIGHT IN MY FACE and it touched my face... i SCREAMED and jumped up and punched the guy in the side of the head, the bouncer came in and the guy was sitting there with his dick out so he got kicked out of the club thankfully. i felt so fucking violated, he was lucky i didn't punch him in the crotch, but i didn't wanna have to touch it. it was a black guy too, and i'm not racist but i've never been with a black man before and never saw a black man's dick in my life. it was a monstrosity. so i was just so completely freaked out and traumatized. if i ever saw that guy again, i would beat the shit out of him.
    That's funny and disgusting at the same time!
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Quote Originally Posted by Bella21 View Post
    That's funny and disgusting at the same time!
    I agree....I'd have punched him too..and ewww gross...but I cant help but laugh. What must have been going through his head.....
    "wow...this girl is SO hot...you know what would make this even better? If I smack her in the face with my monsterous cock....I just KNOW she'll be so impressed by my balls that she'll suck me off right here. Hell..she'll probably thank me"

    Retard.
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  19. #19
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Just to add a little humor to the whole guy trying to whip his dick out thing...just to get your minds off the horrendous things at work...please read my lil' story about "Matt Callan" that I posted in the Picture Post section under Nerdy's infamous thread titled "pic of me...". I'm sure you guys can relate stories about customers to this dude. I won't re-post the story here because I don't want to get in trouble for repetitive posts lol.

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    Shock story? Wow. I got so used to that kind of thing I just accepted it as the norm.
    I meant for your non-stripping friends.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    I'm trying to figure out what's worse... that this happened.. or that it seems perfectly normal to me.



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    Default Sorry girl

    We all have those moments when someone decides to treat us as less than human. And it is in that instant when you have to make the choice if you are going to allow it to penetrate your armor, or just roll right off.

    I know sometimes it can be hard to be strong and not let all the bullshit get to you. But it is very important to set your boundaries as to exactly what you are prepared to do, and allow happen to you. If something makes you feel uncomfortable, don't be afraid to put your foot down and put someone back in their place. Literally, if that's what it takes.

    If you don't want to be touched, it doesn't matter what the other girls do. Set your limits, and let the customers know exactly where your lines are drawn. It can be difficult if the club rules are very different from your personal rules. But make your stand, because while some customers might think they are getting "ripped off", a lot of them will actually appreciate knowing what they can do, and respect you for what you won't put up with.
    Always remember: Everyone you meet has loved something, has lost something, and is afraid of something.

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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    Sorry that happened to you, I know how you feel. Some times customers come to expect that because some girls do the extras.

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    Veteran Member carmen124's Avatar
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    Default Re: i feel Violated and Disgusted

    GROSS. I'm so sorry that happened to you!! I hate those customers that just ...make your skin craw!! But at least now you know what he looks like in case he ever comes back in.

    I've never had anyone whip it out or attempt to...yet :: knock on wood :: but I do get propositioned almost every night. I always just give them a look like, oh you poor, pathetic little man! then say something like. "oh hunny, didn't you know? this is a strip club not a brothel. If you really need to pay for sex I'm sure you can buy a nice hooker I'm sure you can find a great one on Apache Blvd. Then I just shake my head and walk away. Seems to work everytime.
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