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Thread: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

  1. #26
    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Paris - yeah it was pretty sad. i dont even know if she knew that alot of people made fun of her! yeah and i hope id never be a 'joke' and not know it..either -that'd be horriable!

    TaylorSkye - haha im also half asian..and i see my mom do that exercise move too LOL! its ok for excersise...but on stage? lol. wut asian are u? im half chinese and then half white(irish,german,dutch,jewish). everyone thinks im spanish and/or native american in the club - i just say yes to avoid explaining and plus its fun to make up stuff bout yerself sometime-breaks your bordeom
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  2. #27
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    The club that I waitressed at for that short bit in Corpus Christi had this one girl....I don't know if I should say it was..."funny"...but....

    This girl was a chunky - I think hispanic - girl, she was a *big* girl, was tall and quite hefty. She would go on stage in super tall shoes (like the 10 inch REAL chunky ones) that made her look even huger, the same black tube dress thing that did not accentuate her large mid section, her hair pulled back into a loose, poufy bun with a normal cloth sports scrunchy all bunched around it, and would try to gel back the lose pieces by her face while leaving the rest poufy. No make up whatsoever - not even lip gloss or mascara, and plain jane glasses. The thing she was, she could do pole tricks. She could do some pretty crazy ones...but...maybe because she was so big or awkward looking...everyone stopped to stare at her and would just have their mouths hanging open, dreading the moment she would hit the floor. She would get to the top and then slide super fast to the stage and crash heartily into a split on the floor with a huge SMACK of her ass and the bang of her huge shoes. Everyone would dread when she went up...because we couldn't help but stare with our mouths open in shock and hoping she wouldn't climb it....

    But she always did.

  3. #28
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Uhh, can I just say that I used to have a purse that was a stuffed animal (a dog) and walk around and introduce it to customers as "my bitch?" I thought it was really funny, but after reading these posts, I'm starting to question my own lameness. Hey, that bitch was a good ice breaker though, and I was only 20 at the time so it had that whole dirty school girl thing... LMFAO!

  4. #29
    Featured Member flickad's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    ...was this girl who worked at Kittens with me. The management didn't want to fire her (I'm assuming because she was a cancer patient and they felt sorry for her), though they probably should have. She was the only stripper I've ever met who refused to dance. She would not get on stage by herself and when she did get up there she would just stand on stage motionless. She wasn't shy either- I saw her hustling for dances- but she had some problem with moving around on stage. I didn't get it.
    Last edited by flickad; 01-28-2007 at 05:16 AM.

  5. #30
    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    this one chick would do like, jumping jacks. and she'd go to the third stage (not open, at the time, by the way) and just start dancing on it, like seriously!

    when it gets slow some girls practice pole on the back stage but this was not that.

    another was at my old club - and even though this one wasn't a bad stripper - she stands out it my mind because she was about 5'0 without heels, white girl, normal average build but her ass was probably about 2-2.5 ft wide. i shit you not. cheeks bigger than my torso.

    it was the biggest ass i've ever seen on a person who wasn't obese. it looked like some grossly exagerrated political cartoon.

    she'd do this move where she'd lay back on the stage floor with her legs straight up in the air, usually without undies on, and "walk" towards the customer sitting at the end of the stage... but... using her ass as feet/legs?!?!!

    ill never forget her as long as i strip.

  6. #31
    Veteran Member ExtacyInDaytona's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    worst stripper i ever saw we called "wedding dress girl" her second night working she literally got on stage in a wedding dress an old poofy sholders cigerette smoke stained WEDDING dress~! she would wear bright red lipstick like on the out side of her lips and you could barely understand her when she spoke. MOST out there person i have ever met! than of course theirs the asian hooker DJoser used to post about but i think wedding dress girl was worse! whats funny was wedding dress girl and lola used to try and work the floor together oh man if i had a picture! YOU have noooooo idea

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    God/dess VegasPrincess's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Hehehe
    Sexy Jasmine after getting fucked over at work:

    God loves strippers and when guys do things like that its an automatic ticket to HELL!


    Quote Originally Posted by anomar View Post
    Perhaps you stopped spending money on her. Strippers need money to operate. They are like coin operated juke-boxes of love.

  8. #33
    exotisch23
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Were any of the strippers mentioned here as bad as

  9. #34
    God/dess krchab99's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    omg this thread just brought up a memory of the nastiest thing i have ever seen happen in a strip club. THere was this older lady dancer who rather large it was like her secound night in the club she was real vulgar in her dancing but this move toped it all she grabbed the pull up bar and put her legs on her custy's sholders without a thong on this was sooooooooo dam nasty you had to be there to belive it. That act broke every law in ga to lol she was fired that night.

  10. #35
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    New girls tend to dance too fast (frantic) or like they are at a hip-hop or techno club.
    Most of us experienced girls expect it, but sometimes it can still be pretty funny.
    My recommendation is that you remind your self to move sensual and slow, until you get used to it. Then perhaps, you'll find you prefer being more high energy!

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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    There was one girl I worked with that would stand in the middle of the stage and just kinda stand there looking bored even if people were trying to tip her. She would stick her arms straight up in the air and wiggle them back and forth slightly. She had 2 other moves. One consisted of getting on all fours with one knee slightly in front of another and moving slowly back and forth while keeping her body stiff like a board. The last and final move consisted of this girl reaching down to pick up her crown royal "purse", taking out her glitter lip gloss and while applying the gloss on stage she would swing around the purse like little girls do. The part that really tops it all off though, is that this girl went tanning way too much. The likeness to Magda from "There's Something About Mary" was insane. I mean seriously. Magda but 20 years younger. When she got off stage she would go around and ask all of the customers if they would like to tip her. Most said no. The bad thing was that she had been dancing for about 5 years at other clubs. It was bad. Yet, somehow I miss the "entertainment" for all of us on slow nights.

  12. #37
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    The other night a customer had me pissing myself laughing and I usually ignore customers who say mean things about my fellow dancers at work but I couldn't help but laugh.

    He said "is there a dancer here that has really huge but really saggy tits?"

    I knew who he meant.

    Then he described how last time he was at the club his friend told him to get a dance with her and he was pretty drunk so he went along with it.

    He said he couldn't wait for the song to be over coz she just sat there squeezing these saggy tits. He spent the whole time starring at her feet.

    I know it's mean but I couldn't help but giggle.

  13. #38
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    This girl who wore sneakers and did the backwards bunny hop - she would kind of crouch a little, smack her ass cheeks with both hands and hold them while jumping backwards towards the customers.

    And the 5'1" 200lb stripper. First she came to a club I was at, and I was nice to her and defended her to the customers even tho she was a total bitch to everyone. Then I went to her club and she told me that I "fucked with her" but I'm at "her club now" and these are "her girls," etc. Sometimes when it was dead she would just lay on stage like a big naked beached whale...



  14. #39
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Heh. At my last club we had this 45-ish year old Phillipino lady that worked there. Her English was choppy, but was a super nice lady. However, she wasn't exactly what customers wanted to see on stage. Her first day, she and I were sitting with two customers (one of which was a good friend of mine) and she started making out with the other one. Trying to be nice, I said 'hey sweetie, you can't do that, you'll get fired and/or arrested for prostitution (laws are REALLY strict here).

    Then, I see her do it with a few other guys. When she danced she did these big dramatic hair flips and stuff, like a vegas show dancer, it was odd. After awhile, she wasn't making money so she'd play with herself on stage. She'd look up and giggle and say 'oops i couldn't get my finger in!' Not the brightest girl.

    The last time I saw her, she was talking about a customer (she was married btw) and she says 'oh yes, he's very nice, and he gives me good sex!' i didn't even dare ask...
    I believe you Dottie and you have my support

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    God/dess Lena's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Oh, and then there was the girl in WV that was nervous her first night so she brought her mom and stepdad in. They sat in the back of the club the whole night and she'd go sit in her stepdad's lap in a little bikini outfit... then she tried to get me to give him a free lapdance.



  16. #41
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lena View Post
    Oh, and then there was the girl in WV that was nervous her first night so she brought her mom and stepdad in. They sat in the back of the club the whole night and she'd go sit in her stepdad's lap in a little bikini outfit... then she tried to get me to give him a free lapdance.






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  17. #42
    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lena View Post
    Oh, and then there was the girl in WV that was nervous her first night so she brought her mom and stepdad in. They sat in the back of the club the whole night and she'd go sit in her stepdad's lap in a little bikini outfit... then she tried to get me to give him a free lapdance.
    i started to hear banjos playing in my head when i read that.

  18. #43
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    I saw a fat girl break the pole once.

  19. #44
    Veteran Member Sinful333's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by xoxoGracexoxo View Post
    My first club -- the Crazy Lady -- was justly famed for it's wacky dancers. My favorite was a very sweet lady who looked about 50. She'd been dancing for 25 years, she said, and hadn't updated her look since 1982. She had HUGE blown-out bleach-blond hair-dos, was tanned the color of iced tea, and wore those thongs with suspenders that go over your shoulders -- neon yellow. On stage, she mostly just leaned against the pole. I guess after 25 years you get tired.

    One night in a drunked fit of generosity, she gave me her old schoolgirl outfits, telling me, "I know out there I look 19, but I just feel silly in these anymore." Really, she was very nice. Always looked out for the other girls, too. I surely hope she is retired these days...on that ranch out west where they send old strippers.
    Oh my god... I just laughed out loud!!!

  20. #45
    Veteran Member Kitsune83's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by LatinaRose View Post
    I saw a fat girl break the pole once.

    That's the saddest thing I've ever heard......wow

  21. #46
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    I don't feel bad talking sh*t about this woman because she beat me to it, with no justification.

    Mid-thirties, had a few kids, lost them due to her drinking & drugging...She decided to become a dancer as a lark. She already looked "rode hard & put away wet." Her best move was a standing shimmy under the strobe light, which didn't look too bad. My friend R. said he'd "pay her to keep her clothes ON" & I hushed him...This was before she started talking sh*t...
    The worst part is that her "husband" resembled her closely (think "brother & sister- closely") & they were from rural Missouri....it freaked people out. He ended up working at the same bar...the last I saw her she was fatter & on a plane back to Missouri because her "husband" was banging nubile young Puerto Rican crackheads. (He ended up getting arrested for theft...and got away from the police by running through a sugarcane field...& hiding out at a crackhead dancer's place....These things only could happen in Puerto Rico, man, or maybe Florida, LOL!!)
    OH well, some people's lives serve as a warning to others...LOL
    (I just realized the same detail-oriented glee that men draft "Dear Penthouse" letters with, women use to write smack about other women. LOL!!!)

  22. #47
    Featured Member echomadison's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by manchester View Post
    this one chick would do like, jumping jacks. and she'd go to the third stage (not open, at the time, by the way) and just start dancing on it, like seriously!

    when it gets slow some girls practice pole on the back stage but this was not that.

    another was at my old club - and even though this one wasn't a bad stripper - she stands out it my mind because she was about 5'0 without heels, white girl, normal average build but her ass was probably about 2-2.5 ft wide. i shit you not. cheeks bigger than my torso.

    it was the biggest ass i've ever seen on a person who wasn't obese. it looked like some grossly exagerrated political cartoon.

    she'd do this move where she'd lay back on the stage floor with her legs straight up in the air, usually without undies on, and "walk" towards the customer sitting at the end of the stage... but... using her ass as feet/legs?!?!!

    ill never forget her as long as i strip.
    I have also worked with a girl just like this! When she first started dancing she shook her ass and whole body so fast she looked like a hummingbird. It was not attractive at all, she looked like she was convulsing...haha
    Hey Manchester, did she happen to be a blonde named "Sky" and worked at Hustler club on and off?

  23. #48
    God/dess blondhottie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lena View Post
    Oh, and then there was the girl in WV that was nervous her first night so she brought her mom and stepdad in. They sat in the back of the club the whole night and she'd go sit in her stepdad's lap in a little bikini outfit... then she tried to get me to give him a free lapdance.
    Why am I not surprised that this happened in West Virginia?

    For anybody who's from there, I'm just teasing.

    There are a couple that stick out in my mind. A few girls who were way too big to be dancing, with cottage cheese butts and thighs and bodies that shook with them when they danced.

    There was one girl who was pretty new to dancing-she didn't really dance at all, but just shook her ass up and down the entire time she was on stage. She even did this when doing a bachelor dance for a guy-all she did was shake her ass.

    One girl with all of her teeth missing except for about 2 of them who would dance really super fast on stage.

    One girl who just looked really bizarre on stage-she wasn't new to dancing either, she just had some really strange moves. I can't even describe them-you'd have to see for yourself. Everybody kind of looked at her like "What the hell?" when she was on stage.
    Last edited by blondhottie; 03-08-2007 at 11:54 AM. Reason: spelling






  24. #49
    Member asinglehungrygrasshopper's Avatar
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    My fiance, years before I met him, was on Rikki Lake because he and his sister were watching, the topic was "I want to be a stripper!", and they thought "Hey, free trip to Chicago!" Now he's a very VERY beautiful boy, if on the skinny side, but he looked like a total dork with what he wore on the show. (Meanwhile his sister was waggling her finger all "He's so smart he does NOT need to be a stripper uhn uhn uhn" to hilarious effect.) He's also got great rythm and movement, and is good at... Industrial club dancing. This does not translate so well to stripping. (I've only seen male strippers on TV, and I really find the usual male stripper dancing style very unhot, but I have to say what looks hot for a guy dancing in a goth club not so much when taking their clothes off.)

    I find the video of the episode to be absolute hilarity. In fact, it's always in our VCR, because we only watch DVDs, and it seems that the only time we use the VCR is to show people the tape.

  25. #50
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    Default Re: The worst stripper you've ever seen.

    The pathological liar....
    I worked with this girl who claimed to have cancer. She shaved her head and everything, saying her hair already fell out in like one day. She claimed to be going through all the chemo and shit, but never lost weight or even looked sickly. I mean if you have cancer I don' think you'd be able to dance. So that was the first lie. Then one day she came in and claimed she had gone deaf in one ear. She was talking like a deaf person and everything, I felt stupid talking to her because I knew she was lying and I acted the fool by not calling her on it. It was awesome when one of the girls caught her on her phone talking with her "deaf" ear. Then she'd make up shit about her parents being dead and a couple months later saying she was going to Maine to visit her mom and dad. Mom was doing something special for her so she obviously wasn't dead. OMG the list goes on and on. Sicko!

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