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Thread: curiosity killed the cat

  1. #1
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    Default curiosity killed the cat

    I just found out that my brother has been off meth for 30+ days. It hurt to know that. I did not even know he used. I feel bad how I found out, he was here and checked his email but did not sign out. I had to read it to find out about his new girlfriend that hes all gaw gaw about. Hes 43 it's strange seeing him all gaw gaw. Now I feel like I should say something but how do I? "Hey Don I was reading your email the other day and seen that you have been clean for 30+ days". I know I'm a bad person for doing it but it might be the thing that brings us closer together. I don't know what to do.
    I had to tell someone.
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

  2. #2
    mermaidnz
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    least hes off it. if you hadnt noticed a change in his personality id guess he wasnt using it all that much anyways.

    if hed been on it daily, youd have known about it!

  3. #3
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    Quote Originally Posted by mermaidnz View Post
    least hes off it. if you hadnt noticed a change in his personality id guess he wasnt using it all that much anyways.

    if hed been on it daily, youd have known about it!
    That's not quite accurate. I have known many a "functional" meth user. The only way you could tell they were users is if they couldn't reach their dealer and were heading for withdrawls.

    Big Daddy-I don't know what to tell you. I'm glad to hear that he's not using anymore, though.

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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    He was not around much, so I figure when he was around he was not on it and was normal. I only seen him like once every few months. He had lost a lot of weight the last year or so. But he kicked his wife out, started playing the six string again. I'm guessing that's when he got clean. I feel like a piece of shit for not being around to help him. After all I know where he lives. It hurts to know your big brother was laying in a ball on his living room floor alone going through with draws. My big brother the one who would have kicked anyone's ass for picking on me when I was a kid. I can't take it.
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

  5. #5
    mermaidnz
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    Quote Originally Posted by Glamazon View Post
    That's not quite accurate. I have known many a "functional" meth user. The only way you could tell they were users is if they couldn't reach their dealer and were heading for withdrawls.

    Big Daddy-I don't know what to tell you. I'm glad to hear that he's not using anymore, though.
    functional, yes. but theres other signs - eating, skin apperance, social behaviour... i guess if your not looking for things like that tho, and didnt live with the person, it would be easy to disguise.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    "Bull: That is no ordinary star. That is the tear of a warrior. [...] One who has finished his battle somewhere on this planet. A pitiful soul that could not find its way to the great spirit that awaits us all."

    He didn't tell you for a reason, so keep this knowledge locked up. He'll tell you when he's ready. He's in control now, one of the quickest ways to relapse is embarrassment. If he looks up/respects you, he probably will tell you, but more importantly, when HE is ready. Then you can smile and say "I knew all along" and give him that hug.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    I don't know Mast, I feel he needs someone to be there for him, help him keep his mind off of it. His girlfriend lives 70 miles away so she can't come help him all the time. I wish I could afford to buy another quad so he could go riding with us when we go. I know he would like that, but I just can't afford the up keep on 3 quads and 3 pickups, new house, etc. I will figure something out.

    Thanks for the sholder guys!!
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    Maybe you can offer him an ear or help when he needs it without mentioning his problem. If you want you can be around more to monitor him better. Maybe you will witness positive changes and in case not you can help him when he needs it.

    If you read he's been clean then I really hope he keeps staying that way.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  9. #9
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    You kind of hit the nail on the head when you said " Your big brother would kick anyones ass who was picking on you " . He probably has protected you his whole life thats what most big brothers do he didnt want you to be the one to pick up his pieces . I imagine he has a lot of pride that he doesnt want to swallow , but he did it his way and didnt bring down the family on the way . It is no failure on your part don't be so hard on yourself his addiction had nothing to do with you .
    I would let him tell you when he is ready . Better news that he is clean and you found out then he is useing and now you must clean him up ( been there not fun ) . Spend more time with him family support and love will help him along .

  10. #10
    Glamazon
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    Default Re: curiosity killed the cat

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    "Bull: That is no ordinary star. That is the tear of a warrior. [...] One who has finished his battle somewhere on this planet. A pitiful soul that could not find its way to the great spirit that awaits us all."

    He didn't tell you for a reason, so keep this knowledge locked up. He'll tell you when he's ready. He's in control now, one of the quickest ways to relapse is embarrassment. If he looks up/respects you, he probably will tell you, but more importantly, when HE is ready. Then you can smile and say "I knew all along" and give him that hug.
    OMG, Mast, this is exactly what I wanted to say, but wasn't quite sure how to put it. Very wise words.

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