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Thread: Getting the strength to just walk away...

  1. #26
    God/dess anomar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Oh man thank you so much for posting this thread ck! I kept it in my head yesterday night...

    This guy walks up to me while I'm onstage -- no one else is tipping! He gives me $2, says to come sit at his table when I'm done and talk to another person there. I go to the table, introduce myself, sit down... the other person goes to the rack to tip, ignoring me! The original guy says "Oh, just keep waiting right here, they'll be back... and they are going to spend money on you, see that guy is the vice president of this great construction company, bla bla bla" (waitress comes by, he doesn't offer me a drink!).

    So I smiled sweetly at him and said "This is such a long wait, you don't mind tipping me to keep you company do you sweetie?" He shot daggers at me, "You want me to TIP YOU FOR SITTING HERE?" Me: "Mmmm hmm! No? Well then I won't waste my time with you then. I'll be getting back to work now!" (Of course he has a pile of about 50 1 dollar bills in front of him, which he does not touch during the entire conversation.)

    After about two more songs, he and his friends all get up and leave... two songs during which I felt very glad I wasn't wasting my time.

  2. #27
    Veteran Member badpixie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    I do not make excuses about the dressing room, bathroom, DJ booth, etc when I want to leave. Little white lies do not help when the guy is already totally delusional about how hot/rich/funny/interesting/desirable he is and how much you want to sit with him for free. Either he is conning you and pulling all the right moves to get meek/polite/easily manipulated girls and newbies to sit with him all night/promise to call and go out with him, or he is genuinely clueless as to the fact that this is your JOB. It is probably the former, but you should assume the latter and be polite but FIRM and remind him that you need to work and your time is valuable.

    "It was really nice talking to you, it would be fun to sit here all night, but you understand I need to get back to work! You're a real gentleman [these guys tend to think of themselves as gentlemen, "nice guys", guys that "respect you for you" blah blah blah] but flag me down when you are ready to be naughty with me."

    Or something similar to what the other girls said. Don't lie and make excuses. Don't let him think you're that dumb.. he will play dumb right along with you, possibly flagging you down later for more stupid chitchat! If he really won't get dances, so what.. but if you're polite (and you gently let him know you mean business), he just might come find you and ask for dances. It has happened to me!

  3. #28
    God/dess fancygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    I find myself saying:

    "I'll check back with you later" as a mimick of that tired line WE hear all the time from THEM: "Why don't you check back with me later?" even though a lot of times they don't mean it. I don't have to mean it later, but at least I leave it open-ended in case I feel like they finally might spend money.

    Another thing I do is look across the room, and say:
    1. I have a client scheduled to meet me in a couple minutes. If I don't see you again, have a nice night.
    or,
    2. My client just arrived. Talk to you later!

    ^ makes you look in demand and might make them rethink being dumbasses not spending money.

  4. #29
    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    I'll just literally stop mid sentence and walk away. I'm a huge bitch that way. I have no time or patience for jerks that waste girls' time at the clubs. Pisses me off.

    Try it my way once, you'll love it! It's soooo gratifying.

    Feature costumes for sale!

  5. #30
    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    ^^Yup. You don't have to be rude at all. In fact, it's more effective if you're perfectly civil. Just get up and excuse yourself the minute they say they don't plan to get a dance. The expression on their faces is priceless.

  6. #31
    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    what happens when ALL the custys in the club are time wasters?

    last night the club was packed but the majority of the girls were standing around. it looked so strange. lots of men and lots of girls but none of them together and all the girls were complaining that no one is spending.

    and get this, we arent allowed to remove our clothing on stage. so er, what is the point of coming into our club wen the only nakedness youre going to see is someone else's lapdance?

    one group of guys sat alone the whole night because it quickly got round they werent spending.

    and what also bugs me is that my club is so small you actually cant look busy because no matter where youre standing, someone youve spoken to can see you!

    ARGH!

    sorry, im just feeling pretty exchausted
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

  7. #32
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Just say, "It was nice talking to you, I've got to go back to work. I'll check back with you later to see if you want some dances".

  8. #33
    Featured Member short skirts's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    I politely excuse myself and tell them I'm going to run around the room real quick and do a few dances and I'll be back to say hi in a few. usually they are polite and may change their mind when i return. By returning to the table, it makes the guy feel more worthy that I was still thinking about him . I tell them i'm going to give them a chance to sit back, enjoy their drink and watch some of the beatiful ladies on stage. I make sure to tell them to save my seat b/c I WILL be back shortly. Usually it works out. Otherwise, don't feel compelled to talk to them. Someone else will sit down and keep him company as soon as you leave and take up his worthless time while you're out making money.

  9. #34
    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    honestly, if a guy doesn't want a dance from you, even though he's nice he may just want you to leave. i mean think about it - what if he wants one from another girl and she can't come over because you're sitting with him?

    if its motivation think of it the opposite - what if a million guys want a dance from you but you're sitting with the one guy who doesn't? i bet those million guys would just LOVE for you to get the fuck off that ass and come over to them!

  10. #35
    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    last night the club was packed but the majority of the girls were standing around. it looked so strange. lots of men and lots of girls but none of them together
    ahah your club sounds like a 7th grade dance!!

    maybe you could pull a "heavyweights" move and get both sides to come together as one for lots of naked and naughty fun time =D

  11. #36
    Senior Member manchester's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Quote Originally Posted by scarlett_vancouver View Post
    I'll just literally stop mid sentence and walk away. I'm a huge bitch that way. I have no time or patience for jerks that waste girls' time at the clubs. Pisses me off.

    Try it my way once, you'll love it! It's soooo gratifying.
    right, and it's not like you're losing any money by being rude to him lol

  12. #37
    God/dess erotictonic's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    You do what you think is right. When someone convinces you it isn't, then you contemplate that. It doesn't happen often.

    Other than that, there is no reason here and now or then to believe anything else. If you do, then you aren't trusting yourself. What's the point in trusting anyone more than you?

    Obviously, you are thinking that what you will get may be fun, for one reason or another. That's what you have to explore for yourself. Why are you considering things that may be harmful for you?

  13. #38
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    ^Was that even part of this thread??

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  14. #39
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    An example:
    last night at about 530am myself and another dancer decided we would approach two indian guys - I usually avoid them for reasons I wont go into on this thread.

    Guy A: "Oh we have been sitting here for an hour and you two are the first dancers to have approached us"

    me: "well great then let's not waste anymore of your time why don't you and your friend come for a dance with us two?"

    Guy A:"oh I'm not sure yet maybe come back later"

    me: "it's 530am and very soon Im going home so it's now or never"

    guy A:"ah we are not sure just yet"

    me: "ok well I'll leave you here to sit for another hour before the next dancer MIGHT approach you. good luck with that"

    HAHAHAHA

  15. #40
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    ^^HAHAHAHAH!!! I have done that too The looks on their faces is PRICELESS

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  16. #41
    God/dess Miss Jessica's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    I say, "Well if you change your mind I'll be around!" give a sexy lil' wink and walk away. This way I don't leave on a bad note, and hopefully I leave him wanting more.
    "We all must suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons. In order to achieve what others don't, you have to do what others won't."


  17. #42
    God/dess PleasureVictim's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post
    Get that crap right out of your mind!! If there's a guy wanting your attention, he's not thinking that, he's thinking "YAY she finally got away from that other schmuck, now maybe she'll come over HERE!" Otherwise, they're not really thinking anything - guys aren't that "bitchy" like girls are hun.
    Will do!

  18. #43
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Getting the strength to just walk away...

    Tomorrow night if i encounter this i am going to try scarlet vancovers trick of stopping mid-sentence haha - i do love my smart ass remarks but i would like to see the look on their face if i just stop mid-sentence. show em how uninteresting they really are!!

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