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Thread: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

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    Newbie Magic_Johnson's Avatar
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    Default guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    I have a friend...let's call him 'Byron'. Right after his divorce, he became a regular at the club a few blocks from his new batchelor pad. Byron is one of the greatest guys I know - a real stand-up guy (he was actually the best man at my wedding). He's the kind of guy whose friends would take a bullet for him. Well - maybe not a bullet - but they'd pick him up at the airport or help him move or spot him cabe fare if he was too drunk to drive home. In addition to being a stand-up guy, he's an optimist to a fault.

    A few months after his divorce, he became the guy who showed up for the weekday lunch buffet at the club a few times a week, ifyouknowwhatimean. He became friends with one of the dancers (let's call her 'Misty', because that's my favorite naughty girl name).

    So - back to Byron - he kept talking about this girl Misty. Misty this, Misty that...it was clear that he was falling in love with her. And by listening to the stories he'd tell about shooting pool with her after her set, hanging out after the pool games in between sets, it was clear that he thought she was falling in love with him as well.

    Now, I'm not a regular strip-club goer. Not because I don't like looking at naked ladies (which I do), but I always thought it was kind of silly to make a habit of giving money to girls who are, for the most part, guaranteed to not sleep with you. That having been said - during my single days, when Byron pitched the idea of going to the local strip club together, I often took him up on it. I'm kind of shy in the strip-club environment myself...I'm often the blushing guy with the "aww shucks" look on my face as the girl grabs the $5 bill in front of me. As much as I love watching the bouncing bewbies, I love watching a girl completely own the room just as much.

    So...I went with Byron to see this girl Misty do her thing. Misty was a beautiful girl - absolutely gorgeous - and she knew how to work a brass pole with Warrant playing over the PA. After her first set, right on cue, Misty came over to us and asked if we wanted to shoot some pool. With neither of us being stupid enough to turn down billiards with a foxy lady, we played a few games. It became evident to me that Misty's friendship with Byron was genuine - she wasn't hustling him, and she wasn't trying to milk his wallet. After all - Byron is the nicest guy I know, and he's extremely respectful towards women (including ones who get naked for cash). It was completely natural for her to gravitate towards him in a crowded room full of skeevy dudes.

    Then came the moment that broke Byron's heart. I asked the question that Byron really wanted to know the answer to, but didn't have the balls to ask during his numerous journeys to the club:

    "So, Misty...are you seeing anybody?"

    She replied yes - she was seeing somebody.
    The owner of the club. (doh!)

    At that moment, it all came crashing down on poor Byron's head. His '96 Saturn and admin job at a local tech company simply could not compete with the guy that owned the strip club.

    Byron stopped talking about Misty after that. And he started showing up a lot more for pick-up basketball games instead of going to the club.
    Last edited by Magic_Johnson; 02-06-2007 at 11:46 PM.

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    Veteran Member Smokeless's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Interesting, very plausible, and sobering story. When we become obsessed, it's hard or impossible to ask the obvious but hard question.

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    Senior Member WoodyLV's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    too bad his fantasy was blown. i'd still play pool with her. rather watch her bend over than my buds.

    .

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    awww poor byron

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    Featured Member AkashaM's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    maybe she just thought he was cool...it happens sometimes. strippers are people too. maybe she likes pool and had a free moment, understanding that this is breaktime for her and once its over she goes back to work.

    Either that or he just didnt give her any $ in front of you. LOL

    "Hustling" in the SC world is not about being devious or tricky; its about being charming and entertaining coupled with good sales skills. Alot of people dont get that.

    byron went to the wrong place looking for love, thats all.
    I'm getting my Dial-A-Stripper service up and running again. If you are in NYC or NJ and are interested in private party dancing, email [email protected] with your SW handle, contact info, photo (if you have one) & best time to call and I'll get back to you asap.

    If you're having a party and need strippers, email me with the details and any questions you have. Thanks!

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    Veteran Member BmiWMT14's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Johnson View Post
    I
    It became evident to me that Misty's friendship with Byron was genuine - she wasn't hustling him, and she wasn't trying to milk his wallet.

    That quote above says it all. I have plenty of female friends that are involved but they are still friends. Byron should take it for what it is, a cool woman who likes to hang out with him. Who knows it could develop into something more later on or he just may have picked up a new friend.

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    Newbie Magic_Johnson's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by AkashaM View Post
    maybe she just thought he was cool...it happens sometimes. strippers are people too. maybe she likes pool and had a free moment, understanding that this is breaktime for her and once its over she goes back to work.
    Oh, I'm quite sure that this was exactly the case. She thought he was a cool guy, and rightfully so - he is a cool guy. It wasn't like she was giving him the impression that a romantic relationship was on the horizon - she was just being cool and shooting some pool with a nice guy between sets. I got the impression that she really enjoyed his company, mostly because he didn't do any of those 'creepshow' things that guys do when ogling a dancer who's on stage.

    The problem was this: he made the mistake of thinking that by being nice to him and 'hanging out' between sets, she was making a romantic connection...when all she was really doing was being nice to him and 'hanging out' between sets.

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    Senior Member noctina's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    poor byron....

    thank you for this post.... it really got me thinking!

    when i worked in canada (ontario), i met this french guy from montreal who was staying in town for a month or so on business. i took 3 years of french classes, so i was able converse with him and he showed up at the club literally every day just to sit at the bar and talk to me. he also ended up making friends with the bartenders because he was such a sweet guy. i never tried to hustle him, i just wanted to get drunk with him and speak french when i was bored! anyway, one day he never showed up again and i mentioned him to one of the bartender girls. she told me that he was in love with me and had seen me get into my boyfriends car at the end of the night and it broke his heart, so he had to go back to montreal and didn't even wanna say goodbye to me. she told me all kinds of stuff that he said about me to her, that he wanted to take me back to montreal with him and marry me. i was so shocked and i had no idea!!! this guy definitely fell in love way too easily....

    pretty much the exact same story as yours, but from the girls point of view. i felt soooooo bad. it is so easy to make friends with a nice guy and end up leading him on, which is honestly the last thing i wanted to do.

    i have told nice guys before, "you shouldn't be in a strip club going after these women, you should be out in real life trying to find yourself a nice girl to actually be with!"

    hopefully your heartbroken friend will move on, he sounds like a sweetie.
    hits from the boooong

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    You're right about something in your post that dancers are guaranteed not to sleep with/go home with you.

    Well at least he has learned his lesson (hopefully).

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    After Miss "Cherry Pie" said she was taken, Byron should have asked her if she had any hot friends she could set him up with.

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Sounds like Byron was in a weak point in his life and took seriously what was offered in fun. Agree with the comment that SC's are not the place to go when looking for a relationship. There are many other, non monetary place to ge for that. Disagree with the comment that strippers are guaranteed not to sleep with you. They sometimes do...but not usually with the "nice", vulnerable guys like Byron.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    well of course they sometimes do sleep with guys they meet in there, i probably should have phrased that differently.

    what i really meant was that it would be far easier to go to a regular bar or nightclub and meet a woman to sleep with.

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    The first rule of SCing is one must have realistic expectations within the unrealistic environment of the SC. Byron did not have said realistic expectations.

    Disagree with the comment that strippers are guaranteed not to sleep with you. They sometimes do...but not usually with the "nice", vulnerable guys like Byron.
    Agreed.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Johnson View Post
    The problem was this: he made the mistake of thinking that by being nice to him and 'hanging out' between sets, she was making a romantic connection...when all she was really doing was being nice to him and 'hanging out' between sets.
    Is it just me, or as "problems" go - I mean if the worst thing that happens to you this year is that some stripper wants to play pool with you without dating you, I think you're having a pretty fucking good year.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Pool isnt particularly sexy. Yeah there is a stick and there is a pocket for the balls to go into but a guy shouldnt bet his virility on winning and view it as anything other than a nice few minutes enjoying the company of a good looking woman. I agree with Jenny...its just a fun way to blow off some time...not a sexual encounter.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by Jenny View Post
    Is it just me, or as "problems" go - I mean if the worst thing that happens to you this year is that some stripper wants to play pool with you without dating you, I think you're having a pretty fucking good year.
    oh jenny LMFAO

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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Geez, and what's this about poor Byron? I mean, this girl sounds like she actually enjoyed this guys company too, and was looking to make a friend out of him. But since he doesn't get to "date" her, he no longer sees/talks/visits her? Blah!

    If she were hustling him, and she pulled the "I'm so into you" routine and he THEN found out she had a guy, sure...I can see ditching her and finding a new fantasy.
    Not poor Byron. Silly Byron. He should have stuck around, kept her as a friend and when she discovered that the club owner will trade her in for next years model he could have been the "Shoulder to cry on".
    tsk tsk tsk......




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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    This has nothing to do with girl being a stripper. She enjoyed his company and played pool with him.. she definitely didn't play him.

    I'm with Exotic.

    This is a case of a guy not knowing when a girl just wants to be friends.


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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    People who have just got divorced are VERY vulnerable. Their faith in themself as a lovable person has been shaken, so often they fall in love with the first person who is nice to them.

    I know, because this happened to me when I divorced my first wife. I was well on the way to getting married to a girl who would have been VERY wrong for me, met her parents, etc., when she decided to drop out of college and leave town. When I realized that I was actually relieved to see her go, I figured out that I hadn't really been in love at all.

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by lilithmorrigan View Post
    This has nothing to do with girl being a stripper. She enjoyed his company and played pool with him.. she definitely didn't play him.
    Agreed, this has nothing to do with stripperdom. Or buddies either, for that matter.

    Thread title should be: Ever been in love with a girl and found out she didn't love you back?

    Everyman has been there. And so has every man.

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    Newbie Magic_Johnson's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    The first rule of SCing is one must have realistic expectations within the unrealistic environment of the SC. Byron did not have said realistic expectations.
    Agree with the comment that SC's are not the place to go when looking for a relationship.


    I'm pretty much in agreement with everybody in this thread. I didn't intend to imply that this girl lead him on or anything like that....nor did I intend to portray this a "she broke my friend's heart" scenario. She did not misrepresent her intentions in any way. As I said before - she was just being a cool chick, and he completely misdiagnosed the situation.

    However, I do think it's funny how many of the ladies in this thread immediately felt the need to 'defend' strippers and stripperdom, though...totally not necessary, but understandable. I get the feeling that many of you felt that I was branding this girl as deceptive or dishonorable - and that's definitely not the case.

    And, trust me - as soon as he started displaying signs of swoonage, I tried to drill it into his head that conventional romantic relationships rarely blossom in a place where pretty ladies show their goodies for money...but he was showing the telltale signs of a guy whose visions were clouded by glittery bewbies. You could say that he was looking through the world through boob-colored lenses. He was convinced that she was totally into him - and all that means is that she was really good at her job.

    I feel sorry for the ladies that are in this situation...I'd imagine that most strippers have experienced the doe-eyed-regular-customer-with-unrealistic-expectations thing. Nobody wants to break another person's heart (well, unless they're a skeevy creep I suppose).


    People who have just got divorced are VERY vulnerable. Their faith in themself as a lovable person has been shaken, so often they fall in love with the first person who is nice to them.
    nail > head



    Thread title should be: Ever been in love with a girl and found out she didn't love you back?
    That would be kind of a faggy Dr. Phil-ish thread for a site called 'stripperweb', wouldn't it?

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Johnson View Post
    That would be kind of a faggy Dr. Phil-ish thread for a site called 'stripperweb', wouldn't it?
    You tell me.

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    Newbie Magic_Johnson's Avatar
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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by Everyman View Post
    You tell me.
    OK


















    Yes, It would be.

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    The worst thing you can tell a guy sometimes if "I just want to be friends."

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    Default Re: guys: did you ever have the buddy who thought the stripper was in love with him?

    Quote Originally Posted by no stress View Post
    After Miss "Cherry Pie" said she was taken, Byron should have asked her if she had any hot friends she could set him up with.
    Exactly! It's not like were short on hot single friends who love nice guys
    who don't treat them like total garbage.

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