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Thread: Done being nice

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    Default Done being nice

    I'm about to rant..... just a warning......

    I've officially decided I'm done being nice and polite to girls at work.

    Completely DONE.

    These girls have fucked me over on money way too many times. From now on, I'm messing with their money.

    I have always been a polite dancer and followed the code of ettiquette at the club I work at, but it seems like the other girls just don't. Now this doesn't happen all of the time. (Other than two of the girls who were the subject of Tart's thread on the worst money-grubbing bitches of all time) However, whenever one of the girls is really low on money, she will sabotage whoever it takes to make what she needs.

    If these girls can do it part of the time, then screw it..... I'm doing it EVERY day that I work. I work in Indiana and it's not like the competition is stiff look-wise or even tough for hustling. I'm one of the top girls at work, so I've always been nice about it and let it go when I knew I could get money out of a guy that another girl was with.

    I was being good tonight, and making some money. Not great but I had $200, and one of the girls intentionally cut my money. But you know what...... I snapped.

    And I think it's what I needed. I went back down on that floor. (after a short emotional breakdown in the dressing room.) And in that last hour hustled another $500 take-home without even doing a dance. So there..... I made more money than that girl in VIP anyways.

    I think I just figured out new motivation to make way more than I used to at this club......

  2. #2
    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    I hear ya, I can relate. I don't dance now, but things are actually very similar where I live. The point being, my neighbors mistake kindness for weakness. Other jobs I have worked at are like that too, you bascially can't trust most other people. It sounds like you're back on the right track tho, good for you for making $$$. There was actually a great thread in Stripping about ignoring other girls you work with, also a thread called, when every dancer hates you. Good luck.


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Default Re: Done being nice

    I hear you. I am one of the top earners at my club, (I am also in the Midwest so I know how the competition is), and if the other girls would just get off their behinds they could make money too. I tried being nice but it didn't get me anywhere. I just try to spend as little time in the dressing room as possible and I don't even notice any of the other girls when I am at work, I only focus on the customer.

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    Default Re: Done being nice

    U still at the Garter?

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    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    I hear ya. On one hand, I'm proud of you for realizing that the world is not nice and that you grew a spine. On the other hand, I'm sad that you're becoming calloused and jaded.

    Whenever I meet a fresh 18-year old girl who's considering stripping, I'll caution her or even talk her out of it, espcially if she's a really sweet, naive thing. It's not that I see stripping as degrading, it's because the dog-eat-dog world will destroy your innocence. I've seen too many nice girls become mean girls. I'm glad that I switched clubs because there were so many nasty, mean girls who were requiring me to fight fire with fire. Although I'm fine and dandy, I still fell like I've lost something. Then again, I feel the same way about my experience with the working world in general, hehe. However, in strip clubs, there's no human resources, workplace discrimination protection, etc.

    Remember this story: Elie Weisel was a Nazi concentration camp survivor. After he was freed, his discussed his anger with a Rabbi. He spoke of how he wished that he could torture the Nazis, to take revengo on all they had put him through. The Rabbi quietly said, "I see, you have become one of them." That dose of perception made Weisel realize what was happening to him, and then worked to prevent it.

  6. #6
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    wow. of 4 responces, 3 of them start with I hear you/ya.

    ok. I do this too. It's great motivation, and being too nice doesn't help anyone!!! But don't be so cutthroat that custys notice.

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    Featured Member short skirts's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Why would you want to become one of the girls you don't like?

    It is not fair that some get by doing things the wrong way and the good people seem to get no credit but being one of the nice people is good for your soul and will make you richer beyond what the mean people will ever experience because they limit themselves by being shallow.

    Grin and bare it, it makes you tougher and you won't be a sellout to the industry.

  8. #8
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Quote Originally Posted by whirlerz
    I hear ya, I can relate. I don't dance now, but things are actually very similar where I live. The point being, my neighbors mistake kindness for weakness. Other jobs I have worked at are like that too, you bascially can't trust most other people.
    Oh yes! LOL the neighbor thing happened to my family. My family moved to a farm in the middle-of-nowhere, and sometimes they encounter their fair share of hicks/rednecks. This one neighbor in particular would always drive his huge tractors and cut down my family's driveway, which would wreck havoc to a gravel driveway that my dad spent tons of time and money trying to make look nice. When my mom talked to him about it, the neighbor blew her off and had an attitude. My parents stopped being polite to him after that.

    When I worked at my "favorite"(haha total sarcasm here) retail store known as Macy's, we got tiny little bonuses for selling store credit card apps to customers. This one girl that I worked with asked the lady about a credit card, she said that she would think about it but that she had to go over to the mens' clothing department at the moment to go buy something. Fifteen minutes later, the same woman came back to our department. This older lady "Jamie," who was very assertive, had the highest rates of reporting thieves to security and credit card app sales, literally JUMPED IN FRONT of our coworker right as the woman customer came to the register. The woman asked if she could open a store credit card, and Jamie sung out, "You sure can!" and ended up opening an account for her and getting the bonus. My coworker was pissed off! So, my coworker informed some of us girls that Jamie was being cutthroat, and stopped being super-friendly to Jamie. There were many times that Jamie was cutthroat with me too or even times that Jamie bossed me around, and at the time I was too unassertive to really do something about it, except for a rare few times that I timidly whined about it(ineffective way to go about things).

    It happens all the time at the strip club! Gee if Jamie worked at a strip club instead of a retail store, where ALL of our money is based on sales as opposed to just store credit card apps, I could imagine Jamie being a top earner, an aggressive hustler, and cutthroat(LOL perhaps it is a good thing that Jamie is too old to strip? ). At one club that I worked at, my very unassertive friend got interrupted from a customer she was sitting with, when another dancer "Mississippi" went up to the customer, whispered in his ear, then promptly walked with the customer to the couchdance room. My unassertive friend freaked out about it to another friend of hers(I wasn't there, but I remember hearing her freaking out when I was in the couch room, and she told me about the situation later). Basically my friend did something similar to what I'd done with Jamie...bitched and whined, loud enough to be heard all the way in the couch room, but never actually approached Mississippi about it or dealt with it assertively. So what happened?...Some time later, Mississippi did the same thing to my friend AGAIN! So yeah, I can see how sometimes you can't play too nice. Personally I think it's bad to initiate trouble or blatantly cut throats, but being a *little* aggressive could probably help in the strip club.

    Quote Originally Posted by Krazyjane
    Remember this story: Elie Weisel was a Nazi concentration camp survivor. After he was freed, his discussed his anger with a Rabbi. He spoke of how he wished that he could torture the Nazis, to take revengo on all they had put him through. The Rabbi quietly said, "I see, you have become one of them." That dose of perception made Weisel realize what was happening to him, and then worked to prevent it.
    That is a GREAT example! It is also an example that I'm sure many of us can relate to, but on a much smaller-scale level of course. For example, I was falsely accused of stuff, gossiped about, and snubbed by people back when I was struggling for money(this was in a well-to-do small town; people are snobs at towns like that). Right afterwards, I started stripping so that I could pull myself out of my hard financial situation, and over the first half year of stripping, improved my quality of life by a 10-fold. So half a year later, I was still hating and resenting the very people that had snubbed me and stepped on me before, instead of moving on. I even went back to the very bar that had snubbed me, so that people could see how much better I was doing(boob job, nicer clothes and hair, brand-new car, my own apartment, etc). I told this story to a few people, and although some could relate and high-fived me for using my "success as the best revenge" on those people, some people also criticized me and said that I'd sunk to their level.

    I don't think some of us really think in this spiteful, level-sinking way on purpose...it's just human nature and emotions. But yeah, the influence of negative people(whether it be Nazis, close-minded small-town assholes, or even cutthroat dancers) can sometimes cause a person to become stone-walled and less innocent...which is a good thing most times, but only up to a certain extent, before the person is viewed as an "asshole" with a stick-up-the-ass. When I told Bob about how I was looking to become more assertive, Bob commended me on my current progress with it, but cautioned me to make sure I don't get too bent on it, that I become too aggressive. He told me that when he was in college, there was an Asian girl studying politics who always felt passed over because she was a female, timid, and a minority. Eventually, she dwelled on this until she became overly assertive to the point that she was totally outspoken, challenging, and aggressive. So I think it IS good to become assertive--or in Elie Weisel's case, to become less trusting/forgiving of people in general--but sometimes it is human nature to take it too far. THAT'S where the aggression and total loss of innocence occurs.

  9. #9
    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Remember this anecdote: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me again, shame on me.

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    God/dess leilanicandy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Quote Originally Posted by Krazyjane View Post
    Remember this anecdote: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me again, shame on me.
    I should listen to thay saying
    If you want the present to be differant from the past, study the past.
    Baruch Spindza

    It is what it is, not what you want it to become, that's important -- at least for now. Today, remember that things worth having are worth waiting for!
    The Stars

    Minds are like parachutes: They only function when open.
    Thomas Dewar

    Dont throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water.
    Swedish Proverb

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    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Unrealistic people who love their inspirational books and wear rose-colored glasses love to preach that it's wrong to hold grudges. There's a difference between holding grudges and preventing yourself from getting situation in which you know you'll be ass-raped. Grudges are self-destructive, unreasonable (eg your partner has made a promise, has kept it, but you constantly give him guilt trips, victimize yourself and treat men like shit becuase you're convinced that they're all the same), usually petty, and have the potential to make you the abuser and someone else the victim. When protecting yourself from bad situations, you are circumspect, but you don't let it destroy your life.

    Too many people don't know the difference between the two. I'm not racist, I'm not sexist, I don't consider myself to be judgmental, but at the same time, i am realistic.

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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Yeah, I'm still at the Garter. And I don't make it obvious so that customers notice. But it has been working. I've been making way more though with this new hustle. And just to clarify. I'm doing this in a way, so it's not so obvious. I'm still not going to talk about the other girls on the floor or anything of that manner. But I will continue to go up to whatever customer I want whenever I want even if a girl has sat with him for three hours. If a customer wants that girl, he will let me know he's waiting on someone else. If he gives me money instead of her, then maybe he just likes me better and didn't know how to get rid of her. Don't get me wrong..... I'm not being completely ruthless about it.... but I am making my money now.

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    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: Done being nice

    Quote Originally Posted by kylie3183 View Post
    Yeah, I'm still at the Garter. And I don't make it obvious so that customers notice. But it has been working. I've been making way more though with this new hustle. And just to clarify. I'm doing this in a way, so it's not so obvious. I'm still not going to talk about the other girls on the floor or anything of that manner. But I will continue to go up to whatever customer I want whenever I want even if a girl has sat with him for three hours. If a customer wants that girl, he will let me know he's waiting on someone else. If he gives me money instead of her, then maybe he just likes me better and didn't know how to get rid of her. Don't get me wrong..... I'm not being completely ruthless about it.... but I am making my money now.
    That's great! One of my biggest gripes with women is that they expect life to be fair, and take it upon themselves to "punish" people who they think are causing their misfortunes when in fact they're digging their own holes. Point in case: I started out at a shit hole club with dancers who were at the end of their shelf life and were very nasty. I worked hard for my money, worked out to maintain my size 2, smiled at the guys and stroked their egos, spent the whole night hustling, and made it clear that my time was for sale. I never sabotaged another girl, but I also made moneymaking my first and foremost priority. Of course, rather than go to the gym and read "How to Win Friends and Influence People," the other dancers automatically accused me of sucking cock and burned my stuff. This is a fucking sales job. Those who make efforts will prosper, and whose who sabotage will eventually get what they deserve.

    Good for you for not buying into this entitlement that too many people feel. I've seen it men too, but not nearly to the extent that I have seen it in women. It's not just in strip clubs either.

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