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Thread: just gotta get something off my chest

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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Angry just gotta get something off my chest

    cos i know y'all feel me (god i swear im a closet american...)

    so you know i had that drama last week where that girl started at me because i wouldnt let a custy in VIP with us lick my asshole and then later my friend defended me which ended up in a punch up between the two of them and theyve been suspended.

    so im talking to the housemum last night about it and shes saying to me, shes annoyed because the bitch says she doesnt want to come back and the housemum is pissed off because she "brings a lot of money into the club".

    so at around 2am, i ask to go home and she says no, so i say, im suffering an anxiety attack, im going home. like hello, you dont pay me to be there, why they fuck cant i leave when i want to? i havent made any money, so just let me go! so i left

    but she has someone call me today to ask why i just left with no explanation. i said, i DID tell her why i was leaving and that i even cancelled my shift for tonight. she says i should hav just sat in the DR for a while! hello, can you say unsympathetic? i never earn enough to pay full commission at the end of the night, so why the fuck does she care wether i stay or go? they arent making money out of me, so why is she calling me up?

    i feel like i should have told her to stick the job up her ass because id rather NOT work in a fucking brothel!

    im so fucking angry because i am SICK of spending hours bullshitting and convincing and having to be one step ahead of arsehole guys trying to get something for nothing.

    is it actually possible to make an honest, decent living in this industry anymore? because from all the stories im hearing it doesnt look like it.

    all i wanted was to work a year in this job, make enough to spend a year travelling america and australia and settle down in either country as a surfer by day and dj by night.

    is that SO MUCH to fucking ask!?!?

    i am SICK of giving men what they want when they DONT fucking deserve it and i have to spend hours convincing them they want something they dont deserve and i dont want to give them.

    so yeah, maybe im not cut out for this business, but i never thought it would be so hard to be attractive, intelligent, a sexy dancer and graciously get paid for it.

    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    cos i know y'all feel me (god i swear im a closet american...)
    Lol, is that a stereotype that I haven't heard yet?

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    i never earn enough to pay full commission at the end of the night, so why the fuck does she care wether i stay or go? they arent making money out of me, so why is she calling me up?
    What do you mean pay full commission? If you're not making enough at this club, have you thought about trying others? It IS possible to make a lot of money in this industry without turning tricks.

    Also... It really makes you think when the clubs employee's are bummed that a dirty girl quits.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

  3. #3
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Wow. I'm sorry Fox

    And no, I don't think it's too much to ask

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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    I don't know if you are working at your first club or not, but I think it's hard to start out in a high hustle high priced club. Now that I've been dancing for a year, I have the confidence that helps me make money and the tough skin to shrug off assholes. It was very hard for me starting out because I did work at a high hustle club and I had no idea what I was doing. I would suggest switching to a lower pressure club where you can really get the hang of things and make money every day.

    There's no point in working at a club with the potential to make 1,000 a night if you never make it. You're better off working at a club where you can consistently make money, it's better for your morale. You can always go back to the high hustle club when you have the confidence.

  5. #5
    mermaidnz
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    omg. what club is that at?

    im thinking of coming to the Uk to work this year, i have heard its low contact?!

    maybe you should try other clubs if your not happy?

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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    im not sure there is such a thing as a low hustle club in London. I know of the strip pubs, but they are super hard to get into.

    there is no such thing as being tipped for dancing on stage in the UK. except for in strip pubs where you go round with a jug wen youre done and im not sure id enjoy doing that.
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

  7. #7
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    i am SICK of giving men what they want when they DONT fucking deserve it and i have to spend hours convincing them they want something they dont deserve and i dont want to give them.

    You're a girl after my heart. Take a break and see how you feel then. I think all of us have some sort of event that just pushes us to the edge at work. But sadly, the amount of money to be made as a dancer is hard to find in most other occupations open to women.

    Try a new club..you're too attractive to toss this all by the wayside...Think it over.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    You are very pretty, and you've spent a good deal of time on her learning how to improve your game. I don't know, but its either you or the club. The first obvious advice is to try to get to a new club.

    Why is it so hard to get into a strip-pub? Have you tried? Don't worry about carrying around the jug for tips. I've done that before for my bellydancers. Its actually fun, you can joke around with the guys and not give them change if they only have large bills!

    But, then again, you may not have what it takes. And that's ok, its not for everyone. Do you have anxiety attacks often during work?

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    sometimes just the thought of having to go over to someone i dont like the look of/couldnt giv a shit about and having to be fake and go thru the motions of batting away bullshit and yadda yadda makes me not even go over. so even if the club has custys, i dont even approach anyone becos i just cant bring myself to do it. so then i just figure, if im in that kind of mood, go the fuck home! id rather work wen im not having confidence issues, or anxiety or whatever and i can be happy and laugh it off and make some money.

    so ive decided to only work fri & sat nights now and get a day job to pay the bills and use the dance job money to save to go travelling.

    im just not happy about the day job idea. the whole point of dancing was so that i could do whatever i wanted with my daytimes. which isnt much apart from eat, sleep and surf the net.
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    i think i forget to leave myself at home wen i go to work. and i forget everything ive learned on SW wen im at work. im too busy sizing people up and trying to find the courage to approach custys and make money.

    i need to forget myself, and forget about the other girls and how busy they are/how much money theyre making/how long theyre in VIP and forget about what the custys look like etc and just approach everyone regardless.

    i am there to make money, this isnt a self/human nature evaluation course.

    sometimes i think i am mentally ill. my brain just gets way too much into my business.
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    You're not mentally ill, or at least not from what you describe. Before you go to work, do your makeup and hair at home. Put on something sexy and your FAVE song, even if its not something the club will play. Dance and prance around, feel confident!

    Just go up to them. Or...if you have a friend to motivate you.....

    I never had the problem dancing, but I get major anxiety just calling people on the phone now. Weird, huh? My boss just makes me do it, so I'm fortunate. Like you, I don't make money if I don't initiate the conversation. And you always have to think that way........

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Hi babe,

    I think I've said it a few times but please try another club. I work in London as well and in my opinion your club is one of the worst ones possible (but I always thought it was just me... that maybe I should have given it another chance... ).

    It might also be possible that when you change the environment and then come back to where you are now your feelings about the club/ hustle will improve

    Most of the clubs in London don't allow any contact at all so you don't have to feel like you should put up with this !!!

    You are pretty so don't give up...

    xxx

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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Thanks Sydney, its good to hear from someone who knows my club. I guess I will try another club. Im pretty sick of wearing gowns anyway
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    i think i forget to leave myself at home wen i go to work. and i forget everything ive learned on SW wen im at work. im too busy sizing people up and trying to find the courage to approach custys and make money.
    ...
    sometimes i think i am mentally ill. my brain just gets way too much into my business.


    yea, i agree. analyzing just leads to the desire for the customer to get that dance to be seen easier imho.. back to the desperation is a stinky cologne/perfume comment i made (i think you knwo which i mean) and just loosen up. get yourself to just have fun. and yes, leave YOU at home and adopt your stripper personality on your drive in, start smiling and saying things like, hi im soandso, BIG SMILE, in the car.

    you aren't ill. at all. my one high- scoring basketball player always says, coach, my shots wont fall? what am i doing wrong? i say.. you're thinking too much. stop thinking, it will come naturally. it will flow when you let it.

    and ya, try a new club!!

    Love it!

  15. #15
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Awww Foxy you're just too sweet to be putting up with not making any money. I can also tell you've been working hard here trying to figure out what's wrong and how to be successful. You obviously take the job seriously enough to be a top earner at some point. Maybe you are not believing in yourself enough, or you are worried about your appearance? I saw that you had a weight loss thingy in your sig for a while and I thought wtf? From what I've seen, there is nothing you need to change physically. I remember you going from super confident to self-doubting. That's no way for a SWer to be!
    Believe me, when you're making the money (and you will but probably somewhere else) you won't have anxiety attacks and you won't feel like you need to leave all the time. You'll be too busy in VIP honing your hustle skills.
    My two guesses are that this job is either not for you (which can't be figured out by anybody but YOU) or your club just doesn't fit with you personally and you should look somewhere else.
    Maybe it's time to have a long introspective talk with yourself about what you are capable of doing and where you belong. It can't hurt to go somewhere else just to rule out any possibilities. And don't feel bad if you aren't cut out for it either...it's a really really hard job and not everyone can handle it. I know I've had this thought too sometimes.

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    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    You could get the commonwealth work visa to Aus (one year) and try to dance there and DJ.

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by SydneyII View Post
    Hi babe,

    I think I've said it a few times but please try another club. I work in London as well and in my opinion your club is one of the worst ones possible (but I always thought it was just me... that maybe I should have given it another chance... ).

    It might also be possible that when you change the environment and then come back to where you are now your feelings about the club/ hustle will improve

    Most of the clubs in London don't allow any contact at all so you don't have to feel like you should put up with this !!!

    You are pretty so don't give up...

    xxx
    This is pretty much what I was thinking. I haven't been in London for a few years but I'm aware from reading here that it's still very low or no contact there for the most part. You should definitely try another club.

    A bad club can TOTALLY ruin your mood and screw up your confidence. It sounds to me like you are in the absolute wrong club for you and it's just wearing on you. Get your ass to another club!! You will feel MUCH better when you go to a club where you don't have to put up with that kind of crap.

    Please. Just go. You'll be glad you did.

    You are a pretty girl so you should be able to get into almost any club you want. Shop around

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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Too bad you are on the other side of the Atlantic, you would bank here in my club, and it's very clean.

    Sure there are rude, drunk, ugly assholes who will try to pick you up, but that's universal, lol. At least here, if they get too rude they get tossed, unlike so many other clubs. And the situation you describe with the other girls would never have happened, they'd get fired instantly here for that shit.

    London sounds like an option. You are definitely too good for your present club, that is crystal clear from the OP.
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    Veteran Member bella du jour's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    lol, yea come over stateside... you'd bank with that sexy accent!
    Rather than discounting the other clubs outright (that's your mind getting in the way) just go and try them out. I never thougt I'd love the gown club I'm at now... too formal, too low key,... but it's like my second home now

    Good luck!




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    Featured Member 21stcenturyfox's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Thanks guys, I want to try and work in a non gown club, I dont feel sexy and happy covered up in a gown. Im sure I would be able to put on a "stripper persona" much easier if I were able to be more creative with what I wear.

    I have been at this club since Christmas and it seems 80% of the custys are time wasters and 20% are spenders who are ALWAYS got by the same girls, every time!

    I also dont think its just the club to blame. I have confidence issues and I discriminate customers and the combination makes me not approach everyone so I dont get the chance to make money because of these two errors.

    But at least I know what they are.
    "Sex is currency. What's the use of being beautiful if you can't profit from it?" - Lily St Cyr (40's burlesque dancer)

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    Featured Member Kabukicho's Avatar
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    Default Re: just gotta get something off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by 21stcenturyfox View Post
    im not sure there is such a thing as a low hustle club in London. I know of the strip pubs, but they are super hard to get into.

    there is no such thing as being tipped for dancing on stage in the UK. except for in strip pubs where you go round with a jug wen youre done and im not sure id enjoy doing that.
    You could at least try the pubs, nothing to lose by going along there and asking for an audition. They are way less stress than London clubs. Also, you do the jug collection before your stage show, if that makes a difference, the guys have to put a minimum pound in so there is no hustling involved (the bouncer will throw them out for you if they don't pay)

    Good luck

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