My neck healed far better than expected so I planned to go back to work. I was really excited to get back as i've missed it a great deal and hadn't thought i'd ever be able to.
I went in and talked to Manager #1 Saturday night, he told me to call Manager #2 and talk to him as he dealt with scheduling.
I called last night; M2 said he and M1 had spoken and they both thought my time at the club was done. To say the least I was flabergasted.
I asked why, probably ten times before I got any sort of answer. He said he was trying to be delicate. I asked who's decision it had been, his or M1's, he said it was both of them. I told him to quit dicking me around, the least he owed me was an honest answer. He said they both thought I had let myself go and was past my prime which I assume is code for you're too old. I said if I was too old/fat/ugly than why were 2 girls, both with issues with being too heavy and looks, rehired. He said maybe they had thier quota of fat ugly old girls right now and didn't feel they had room for more.
Nice eh? I'm part of the fat, ugly, old crowd now apparently.
I can't begin to explain how betrayed and hurt I feel about the whole fucking thing. I didn't leave on bad terms. I was never reprimanded for my weight or appearance, I wasn't late for my shift more than twice in three years. I didn't smuggle booze or drugs into work, I didn't cause scenes in the dressing room or have crying sprees or any of that shit. Wtf. I THOUGHT I was on friendly terms with them. And what's shittiest; M1 could have just told me flat out on Saturday that they didn't need me or whatever. In addition how could M2 make a call about my appearance when he hasn't even seen me since I left?
I worked at the same club for three years. It's the ONLY club i've ever worked in. I don't even know how to go about finding a new club and at this point don't even know if I should bother trying.
The worst part? Even though the hole thing seems hinky I find myself feeling utterly shitty about how I look now and it pisses me off that I would let something logically I feel isn't true to bother me....
For the record, this is what I look like:
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