insecurity. it's a way of verbally confirming the idea that you are out of his/her league.
insecurity. it's a way of verbally confirming the idea that you are out of his/her league.





Fishing for compliments.
They dont want to hear the truth - "yeah you are ugly" they want u to lie to them and tell them how appealing they are or how boring they aren't.
If you wish to make a sale, it's best to use the reaffirming approach "oh no way you're not boring me at all".
If you are in a smart ass mood or dont like the guy then tell him what he knows to be the truth anyway.
Hmmmmm dont mind me I had a bad night last night![]()




I've had a guy friend do this to a dancer at a club once when we were there in a small group...and he was REALLY pouring it on heavy. After the dancer walked away, I asked him what in hell that was all about. He said he was hoping she'd give him a free "pity" dance. I was horrified. How pathetic is that?
Needless to say, I moved to another table. I only went back when he promised to never do it again.
Yet another reason why I prefer to go to clubs alone.....
In all honesty, when I tell a joke that may be rather offensive but is still funny, I use it on myself to break ice and/or whatnot. I take it well, and in that awkward grouping, if you establish yourself as the guy who can take the heat, it definitely opens up the crowd into tearing into you and almost always starts a conversation.
I just judge their type of character and personalities by how they do/don't trash me. I really don't take offense to it, but it's part of my process.
People are not ruled by their memories.





maybe compliment fishing??




Perhaps, but I still think you need to look at the context of what was said. I am the type of person that is not easily offended and has a wide open sense of humor. I am also polite and do not wish to offend someone. If I want to test someones sense of humor by telling a borderline offensive joke then I usually do so by pointing the joke at me. Why? Because I have made myself the "victim" of the joke. This way if the person does not think it is funny I have figured out one of their limits without being a jerk. If I aimed the joke toward another, then I would come off as a jerk. I do this with many people I have just met, not just strippers.
As for the original example given in this thread about "I smell..." Well, can't say that I have ever used that one. I have thought of a funny play off the "I smell..." line, but I would not share it here....in person...I could make it funny...on a message board it would sound pretty lame.





Hmmm...I don't remember the dancer's comment that once prompted me to say "Well I'm kind of shy" as we sat down in the private lap dance room (probably something about me being quiet) but her response was: "Well you can't be that shy if you're back here with me!"
I just smiled and we had our dance. I wasn't saying it to be self-deprecating, more of an explanation. Maybe the guy thought he saw you crinkle your nose or actually thought he smelled. I agree with previous comment about non-verbal communication, as staring-into-his-drink guy is different than laughing-at-his-own-comment guy. All you can probably do as a general rule is dismiss the comment as best you can, and focus the conversation on something more light-hearted.





Say, "Get comfortable on the couch. Now, how does saying that make you feel?"
He's testing you to see if you're going to reject him in some way. If so, he wants to be the first let you know he recognizes his shortcoming (no pun) and that he's at least not self-UN-aware. As if that'll endear him to you in some way. Like a flawed puppy.
-----
Let me know if this seems right. So I can send you a bill for consulting.![]()
Last edited by threlayer; 04-11-2007 at 07:25 PM.
I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.
Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.
NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.
I'll trade you a dance^^
Well, i'm sure the answers posted here are correct for almost all customers that dis themselves, i would be the exception.
When i insult myself while talking to a dancer, i'm hoping that she will agree with me. If i were to tell a dancer that i am ugly, and she responded with "you sure are" or "well that's obvious" then she would be pretty much guaranteed my cash for the night. Of course since i'm a small minority and there's no way she could ever guess that agreeing with me is the correct answer, it has never happened and probably never will. But i keep hoping![]()
I had a regular like this before! He enjoyed being insulted. If I was mean enough to him, he would just take out his wallet and ask me to take out what I wanted. But he wasn't "all there" either. It was actually kind of tough for me to be mean to him, I'm really a nice girl, despite all of my shit-talking.
"Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
"And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion
Originally Posted by Mia M
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