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Thread: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

  1. #1
    Veteran Member layka's Avatar
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    Angry Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    I was a little leery of posting this, but fuck it, my first rant will be this.
    I'm frustrated. I need a SW vacay. I love you girls, but in my second home I feel essentially unwelcome and very little support. I figured that we as dancers, fucking dancers, would have more compassion for others. That we would fully understand how it feels to be laughed at, humiliated and picked apart. Every dancer has had a shitty day, a day where the men tore their ass apart, or the tips suggested they weren't worth shit. We know better than to read into comments made at work, we know better than to take them to heart, but when you're having a bad day where do you go to vent and get support, Stripperweb baby!

    Now, with all that said I'm frustrated that the overwhelming amount of support hasn't been extended to some members going through a tough few weeks. I'm referring to the debates on here concerning Imus. Where are all the damn virtual hugs and kisses now. Is this "bad week" not bad for me just because Imus didn't directly say it to me? Let me tell you how sucky it's been. At my civilian job, we have 50inch T.V monitors that are always turned on CNN, or some other newscast, it is getting stupid awkard when customers walk up to me
    ( I stand in front of the monitor) Customers Look up at the current new info concerning Imus, blush, stammer, speak, repeat. All day, people are uncomfortable and don't know what to say to me. I'm A FUCKIN HUMAN BEING WITH A DEEP TAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    BTW, I live in the Nations Capital, so that's probably why people are acting a lil funny. But anywhoo, I had a old white man ask me how I felt about Imus, I just re-directed the convo b/c I'm sick of the reaction's already. I'm frustrated that my second home, doesn't quite feel like home anymore. I mean we are DANCERS, we put up with rude comments all the time, but can't u relate to hearing someone else talk about a rude comment that actually penetrated? Why is this situation different? The comment doesn't hurt as much as the backlash surrounding it does. One dude actually yelled out the window "Nigger" last night while I was waiting for the fuckin light What the hell dude........ I had to check my palm pilot,lol, I got nervous and figured my bus took me back to the 50's.

    I feel better now, I just needed to say this aloud. I regard ALL of ya'll as part of my community. I think of some of ya'll on my way to work. Hell, I had a couple of u on my prayer list I mean, why do people clam up and objectify hurtful things said to others. No one tells a abused woman to shut up, hurry up, and heal. No one forces a addict through recovery at lightening fast speed and tells them to hurry up, quickly, quickly, get over it.
    So why put a bandaid on a glock nine bullet wound? (yeah yeah yeah, my daddy took me to shooting ranges) Why tell others or subtly suggest that their pain is "mocked" . Hell, you ladies know the black women on here, and you should know us as well enough to give US the benefit of the doubt that WE aren't mocking outrage.

    Okay, I really feel better now. I'm sorry ya'll, I really needed to rant. I wish this crap never happened. I'm so irritated, why is skin color, fuckin skin color such a complex issue.. I know it's not that simple, but sheesh.... Chivalry is dead, human compassion just jumped ship. Enough of my rant, where are all the hugs and shit when your own homegirls need them?
    If you don't stand for something, you fall for ANYTHING.[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  2. #2
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    If I offended you, I apologize. My intention was not to offend anyone.

  3. #3
    Veteran Member layka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    If I offended you, I apologize. My intention was not to offend anyone.
    Girlie you didn't offend me personally. I kind of figured that u didn't intend to get into that type of deabate. I'm just frustarated with what that old man stupid comment has stirred up. I was fine, loving life, being carefree, than BAM. I know what you were getting at, although it may have came across differently, I gave you the benefit of the doubt. You have never came across as cold before, you're in a profession where passion is paramount. I just hope now u can relate, even if just a teeny bit, that's all momma is asking of others
    If you don't stand for something, you fall for ANYTHING.[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    To my beautiful, strong, intelligent, sensitive Layka.

    I'm sorry that you feel so alone at a time like this. You and I have talked at length and you know that I support you in all your struggles and endeavors.

    Here's a hug for you:

    {{{Layka}}}

    And know that your absence will be felt and I hope you reconsider. It can get tiresome, I'm sure, to constantly have to defend, but I believe you were chosen for that by a higher power and that's the cross you must bear. You do that well and proudly.

    Also know that there are others here who help you share the load and it would be a great disservice to those who stand with you if you weren't here.

    You contribute to many, many other conversations around here, not just "those" threads.

    All that said, I understand and support your need for a break. Just don't make it too long sweetiepie.

  5. #5
    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    Aaaah Grow a Pair Layka

    LOL that was funny. Anyway, Yea I know exactly what you're saying..Majority of the time I try to refrain from such topics, because you really do see people in a new light when this happens. Shit, go over to Political Poo and you'll see EXACTLY how some of these posters feel on certain subjects. Very sad, but at the same time eye opening..







    Some Douchebag: "[Pimp C] 12:43 am: its true we got to stick together the black people on SW CK you is teh condoleeza of SW"


  6. #6
    Veteran Member layka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    ^^^ Seriously DylanAngel without your constant support and unconditional love I don't know how I would've been able to stay strong and encouraged. You are truly my heart.
    If you don't stand for something, you fall for ANYTHING.[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  7. #7
    Veteran Member layka's Avatar
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    Quote Originally Posted by cinammonkisses View Post
    Aaaah Grow a Pair Layka

    LOL that was funny. Anyway, Yea I know exactly what you're saying..Majority of the time I try to refrain from such topics, because you really do see people in a new light when this happens. Shit, go over to Political Poo and you'll see EXACTLY how some of these posters feel on certain subjects. Very sad, but at the same time eye opening..
    Leave me alone big head, lmao.

    At first I was crying b/c DylanAngel gave me a fuzzy feeling. Then you had to bring your loud silly ass in here, lmao. Girl, I can never get enough of you, lmao Don't get me wrong, I can handle the heat, but I just wondered where all the love and hugs shit is when their are plenty of us feeling bad enough to warrant it.


    I stay the hell out of political poo, I can't type fast enough to get my point across.
    If you don't stand for something, you fall for ANYTHING.[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  8. #8
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    RE: Imus- two things came to mind for me...one, even Howard Stern doesn't like him (Stern included his first meeting with Imus in the movie "Private Parts" where he was so eager to meet him....Imus cussed at him & slammed the door in his face.) Two, when hateful people get old, they get bitter & say all kinds of mean things because hell, they might not be around to say it tommorrow.

    On my side of the fence, I've had plenty to say about the "immigration debate" but I keep it off of here because it causes too much vitriol. I come here for female bonding and beauty tips, not political BS.

    I apologize for people who lack etiquette or sensitivity.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!



    Layka,

    I've seen people I love deal with the American brand of white-on-black racism. It's ugly. It's maddening. And it's very, very hurtful. I think white folks kind of have to see it first-hand to believe how bad it really is, though.

    That's why I usually stay out of those threads, too. I just get too damn mad.

    I'm sorry you're feeling hurt right now. But please don't feel unwelcome here! I've always been impressed with the insight you bring to all kinds of threads. I hope you don't go away for long (or at all!) because you will be sorely missed.

    Last edited by Nicolina; 04-14-2007 at 10:05 AM.
    "Doc still loved true things, but he knew it was not a general love and it could be a very dangerous mistress." - John Steinbeck, Cannery Row


    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    *hugs* Layka. I always like reading your posts- you're very intelligent and honest.

    I didn't read the Imus thread...I didn't even know who he was, so the whole thing didn't really catch my attention, being all Canadian and CNN-free (probably easier up here).

    Feeling frustrated like you are, and misunderstood and alone...It's the worst. I remember being jeered and taunted in a first year politics class at university because I was arguing in favour of a woman being Prime Minister. WOMEN in the class were jeering that, telling me they could never vote for a woman, just because she was a woman. This was three years ago, with educated eighteen year old women. It was so discouraging and sickening....

    So that's the closest point of reference I have...I don't know you well, but I offer whatever support I can! Feel better, and please don't go away! I'd miss reading what you have to say. It's always interesting and enlightening.

  11. #11
    Featured Member Sinder's Avatar
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    I don't know who or what this Imus said or did, I'm a sheltered Canadian


    But here's a hug for you because I know you need one!

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    Hugs from me, too. Hey, lots of us (<speaks for socially liberal, sensitive white strippers as a group) said we thought Imus was a douchebag! Nicolina and Jenny especially. I'm happy he got fired, I think what he did was unacceptably sexist and racist, and I totally understand the kind of rage his bullshit stirred up for you. Also, I think a lot of girls here forget he insulted women as a group just as much as blacks.

    As far as the awkwardness at your day job, well, shit, they're just especially embarrassed to be white at that particular moment.

  13. #13
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    If you don't like the negativitity in a thread, stay out of it. No one makes you click it. The easiest way not to get offended is to keep yourself in only safe situations.

    Notice I've been very absent from any imus related threads? I have the same reasons you do girl.

  14. #14
    BrunetteGoddess
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    Default Re: Aggghhhh.... I just need to vent!

    Layka?! You're not leaving are you???? Hope not!

    I had to just go read the Imus thread because I don't know who he is anyways.
    Last edited by BrunetteGoddess; 04-14-2007 at 12:41 PM.

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