Results 1 to 15 of 15

Thread: Ha. America, America.

  1. #1
    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    The middle of a field in the south texas countryside...
    Posts
    4,186
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 13 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Ha. America, America.

    Got this in an e-mail today and it amused me. Thought I'd share.

    1. COWS
    2. THE CONSTITUTION
    3. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS



    COWS Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls, but they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.



    THE CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq . Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's worked for over 200 years and we're not using it anymore.



    THE TEN COMMANDMENTS The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse...You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians -- it creates a hostile work environment.

  2. #2
    God/dess
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    4,704
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 8 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.



    And do they really keep track of cows like that? I had no idea...

  3. #3
    Yekhefah
    Guest

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Oh, Pooka. Why do you hate the troops? Why do you hate freedom?

  4. #4
    God/dess
    Joined
    May 2004
    Posts
    6,336
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 11 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    lol, Yek.

    The screwy stuff about our government is funny until you realize how true it is.



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

  5. #5
    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    The middle of a field in the south texas countryside...
    Posts
    4,186
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 13 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Quote Originally Posted by hardkandee View Post
    lol, Yek.

    The screwy stuff about our government is funny until you realize how true it is.

  6. #6
    Banned gingerlee's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Where the cool kids hang out.
    Posts
    4,103
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Heehee, that's funny Pooka!

  7. #7
    Banned rozz's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Taxachusetts
    Posts
    2,369
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    U r un-merican for speakin bad of guvmint. They should be trusted with our civil libertys.

  8. #8
    God/dess UtahMike's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Utah
    Posts
    2,998
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 64 Times in 43 Posts
    My Mood
    Amused

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    I always wonder how they arrived at that 11 million figure for illegal aliens. (Now, they are saying 12 million. I guess some of them must have reproduced.) I mean, if someone were doing a survey, you were illegal, and they asked you if you were here illegally, wouldn't you lie and tell them no?

    Language won't do it because bunches of people whose families have been here since the 1700s speak Spanish or French. Social security numbers--hey the Social Security Administration issued my number TWICE, the second time to a guy from Nigeria with a name almost identical to mine. Luckily, he seems to never have earned anything, but I can't tell you what a hassle that has been for me.

    So, how do they know how many there are? And, if they can count them, why can't they deport them? Of course, they'd just come back, but...

    But the joke IS funny, and I am going to pass it on.

  9. #9
    Senior Member sleepyboy's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Houston
    Posts
    189
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Quote Originally Posted by PookaShell View Post
    Got this in an e-mail today and it amused me. Thought I'd share.

    1. COWS
    2. THE CONSTITUTION
    3. THE TEN COMMANDMENTS



    COWS Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls, but they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give them all a cow.



    THE CONSTITUTION They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq . Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it's worked for over 200 years and we're not using it anymore.



    THE TEN COMMANDMENTS The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse...You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery" and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians -- it creates a hostile work environment.
    I must be amazing because cows are a product and just like inventory it is kept track of.

    Iraq - Then it wouldn't be an Iraqi constituition

    Ten Commandments - some action group hired a team of lawyers to find it was un-constituitional going against the 1st amend. separation of church and state.

    Sorry. I get a little defensive when it comes to US bashing.

  10. #10
    God/dess
    Joined
    May 2004
    Posts
    6,336
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 11 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    ^Aren't most constitutions the same kind of generic BS?



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

  11. #11
    miss marina
    Guest

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    lol pooka..i sent this to my momma lol.

  12. #12
    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    The middle of a field in the south texas countryside...
    Posts
    4,186
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 13 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Quote Originally Posted by sleepyboy View Post
    I must be amazing because cows are a product and just like inventory it is kept track of.

    Iraq - Then it wouldn't be an Iraqi constituition

    Ten Commandments - some action group hired a team of lawyers to find it was un-constituitional going against the 1st amend. separation of church and state.

    Sorry. I get a little defensive when it comes to US bashing.
    Hey I love America as much as the next guy, but it needs to sort out some priorities right now.

  13. #13
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Paradigm City
    Posts
    6,784
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 13 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Quote Originally Posted by PookaShell View Post
    Hey I love America as much as the next guy, but it needs to sort out some priorities right now.
    Not that this is a political thread... but I definitely like Obama just because he said THAT.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  14. #14
    God/dess PookaShell's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    The middle of a field in the south texas countryside...
    Posts
    4,186
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 13 Times in 8 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    Not that this is a political thread... but I definitely like Obama just because he said THAT.

  15. #15
    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Another Country
    Posts
    18,664
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 148 Times in 100 Posts

    Default Re: Ha. America, America.

    You kiddin'... they can track a Canadian cow cause the CANADIANS are trackin' 'em.... what? They got better shit to do?

    MOOSE!


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

Similar Threads

  1. Blue America vs Red America
    By Miss_Luscious in forum Member Boards
    Replies: 37
    Last Post: 10-28-2008, 08:17 AM
  2. Only in America
    By lethalsoul in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 03-21-2008, 03:37 PM
  3. Only in America...
    By Kaylinn in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 06-28-2007, 06:27 PM
  4. Only in America!
    By exotisch23 in forum Member Boards
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 09-14-2006, 01:05 PM
  5. Anywhere in America!
    By Lysondra in forum Club Chat
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 05-30-2006, 09:25 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •