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Thread: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    So I started this Massa Cleansa today.

    It's been referenced a LOT on here and so far, is scares the bejeesus outta me.

    My personal objective is to swtich into better eating habits with as little respiratory based anal leakage as humanly possible, since I have a full work schedule during this.

    I really picked it cause it seems like it could be very funny, , and serve a quick purpose, since it's easy to make. And I got to buy a reamer. (go on. be jealous).

    I did the salt water flush this morning and that was about as fun as Cystic Fibrosis and I don't even know what that is.

    I just made the drink, which seems all fine and dandy, except Cayenne pepper proceeds to rape my mouth.

    I hope to do this for 5 - 10 days. I may bail on the SWF early, citing incontinence. Unless they make asspons, then I may consider...
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    Well I keep thinking "It'll burn if I swallow...will it burn when I poo?"

    *grabs Ted E. Bear, goes under covers for a week and puts a sign on the covers*

    "No Girls Allowed: Quarantine"
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    God/dess RoseWhite's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    I did the salt water flush this morning and that was about as fun as Cystic Fibrosis and I don't even know what that is.


    I'm still giggling at your prediction for the workplace over the next 10 days from yesterday.

    "Mastridonicus: 'So I was thinking you should go with this server reaches over and points because it cough would...work....out....really well for...your....can I use the bathroom?'"

    And I hate to point this out AFTER the fact, but you just said in txt that you used two TABLESPOONS. It's teaspoons - biiiig difference. I doublechecked the amount in 2 places. No wonder you were ill!
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

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    God/dess RoseWhite's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    And yes. if it burns on the way in, it'll probably burn on the way out. Just think of it as kinky.
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseWhite View Post
    And yes. if it burns on the way in, it'll probably burn on the way out. Just think of it as kinky.
    Hahaha!

    Stay away from lit pilots, Mast and you should be fine!!!

    BTW, good luck with this.

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    Featured Member southstbabe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    Careful sweetie, I don't have much faith in anything that comes out of Hollywood.

    *dons mask and tiptoes into check on Mast*

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    So day 2.

    My ass. My ass. My ass is on fire....We don't need no water let the mutha fuckah burn.

    I really didn't have any real cravings or pangs until I got home and smelt a tenant cooking something with chocolate in it. Ohhhhhhh mannn is it ROUGH.

    Around 11 or so this morning I was on the road and I let go some gas that I literally thought was the second coming of Christ it burnt so bad.

    After work I hit the gym, and I went easy. 40 minutes on the elliptical was enough. I envision this weekend to be really hard.

    I received a call from a charming member who showed some concern about me on this because of my size, and my activity, that slowing my metabolism might be bad since I may run "cold". Made some sense, but I'll just watch it. She recommended I read Nourishing Tradition by Sally Fallon

    Oh, I am seriously tired a lot lately. Like I'm ready for the beddy bye.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Diary of a boy on a master cleanse.

    don't worry venus. I got you on speed dial!

    Southstbabe, I ain't going crazy yet. *huggles*

    Rose: Think it's kinky!? Something else?! Hi. I'm Mast. I think about doorknobs in a kinky way.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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