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Thread: lapdancing... agh.

  1. #1
    VeganAvery
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    Default lapdancing... agh.

    So I'm not too good at the whole lapdancing deal. I have tried to watch the other girls and see how they do it, ( i work at a no contact-full nude club) but it seems like they're stepping over the no contact rule with their dancing. Some girls will put both their knees on the customers knees/chair arms and then put their hands on their shoulders and rub all over them, or rub their butts all over the customers laps, or do this thing where they lean back and put their boobs up in the guys face... I'm just not comfortable doing that.

    So how do you give a lapdance that is enjoyable for the customer and not boring (what i do now is pretty much just start facing him, move my hips like i do when I bellydance and then turn around, maybe bend over a bit, and do the same thing.. repeat. boring) We're not allowed to touch ourselves either (breasts) but I see some girls playing with their boobs, squeezing them in front of the customer, rubbing them on the customer.. etc.

    agh. help. I seemed to do fine selling dances (and repeat dances) last night, but I need to mix it up a bit, I feel like I'm not doing it the right way.

  2. #2
    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    I work in a pretty similiar situation as you. Admittably, I don't feel that great about my dances, but still...

    What I've found works for me for keeping it new and exciting is incorporating a couple of different distances/levels with it... If you've been standing and doing the bellydancer hips, Maybe then you squat down(making eye contact) and put your hands on either side of his seat(but not touching him) and slowly pull yourself up, staying close to him(EYES EYES EYES i can't stress this enough!)

    Do a couple of moves that are so close he thinks you're GOING to touch him, and is INSANELY aware of that small gap(Double kudos if you do this towards the end of a song-he'll be so crazy, he'll buy another that second)

    But if you vary the distance you are from him, and make sure that he has to move his eyes to get the full enjoyment, it makes it exciting, and looks like a MUCH more involved dance.

    Someone else probably has better advice, i know i'm not the best at this...

  3. #3
    Member braxley's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    i work in a nude club with contact at the dancer's discretion, and i don't have a ton of experience but i feel like i've managed to learn a decent lapdance in a few days. i found myself asking some of the guys if they were an ass-man, and if they were, i'd just shimmy in place for a minute. i also would alternate getting in really close, putting my hands on the top of the chair and do hip circles while lowering myself dangerously close. i'd also stand with my back facing them and do a backbend, so they could see my face and the top of my chest.

    also definitely with the eyes. this one guy just bought dance after dance so he could stare into my eyes, and would tug on me to turn around if i wasn't facing him. i also was backing up so they could see the entirety of my body before zooming in really close again, so i think you gave good advice, needtodance. i think this is another one of those things that also gets better with practice (and the occasional spurt of creativity). some people have recommended the book "S-Factor" and watching others, but i've just been dancing like i'd like to be danced for.

    also is it just me or is it really hard to do a maya in these heels?!
    "Since society is composed exclusively of dupes and scoundrels, let's decidedly play the latter: it's thirty times more flattering to one's amour-propre to gull others than to be made a gull oneself."

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    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    A maya?


    Never heard the term before... Thats a good idea-I've done some of the "getting to know you" questions for custy's regarding their favorite lingerie, or textures for a beautiful women(haha may as well let their own imaginations work-and maybe go change costume next set and become even MORE fantasy...) But that would also work for favorite body parts, to focus on... I only have one guy i've done that with... he's a foot and calf person, its pretty funny... I just point, and flex, and roll ankles in a circle, see the musculature-and dance on the counter so he can still see the feet...and he loves it...

    But that would probably be a great lead in to making sure they get a mindblowing dance....

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    Member braxley's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    a maya is a bellydance term.. a little hard to explain textually. it's a vertical hip roll of sorts, very pretty.

    yea i asked a lot of guys that night what kind of man they were (ass, legs, tits, EVERYTHING), as well as a lot of loaded questions and subtle sexual innuendo. it worked great for tailoring a dance.
    "Since society is composed exclusively of dupes and scoundrels, let's decidedly play the latter: it's thirty times more flattering to one's amour-propre to gull others than to be made a gull oneself."

  6. #6
    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    ah ok! I've done some bellydancing-but I'm more of a visual learner-and I could barely understand my teacher, so the terminology didn't sink in...

    Now I have a new technique to try when next i dance! yay!

  7. #7
    VeganAvery
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    haha i don't know any bellydance terms for the most part... my cousin taught me everything i know- she tours with a troupe and we go to drum circles and dance

    But yeah... a lot of bellydancing moves are difficult with the shoes, but I've found that they can be adapted by balancing on your toes rather than the ball of your foot... and also slowing down... realllllyyy slowing down and incorporating the chest and arching the back a bit more works for me.. as far as the arm movements.. lol. I'm having difficulties there, because i'm used to being in dancer pose.. hand position and everything.

    It seemed a lot of the guys did like my "style" of lapdancing.. erm. airdancing.. even though I did zero contact because of the eye contact I gave and my tattoo seemed to interest them a lot

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    Featured Member needtodance's Avatar
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    Hmmmm... I'm from a ballet background... used to being on my toes anyways so teh shoes didn't bother me at all... And i've gotten good at incorperating them into my contortion tricks... it always gets good tips when i do a backbend, hold my stilettos, adn force the back curve so that my chest is between my legs, but not on the ground...


    Although with all the other styles i've done, its entertaining when teh clubs empty, and i get to go onstage-last time the DJ gave me a funny set with Johnny Cash, Rockin Round the Clock tonight, and THat'll Be the Day.... And I geeked out--up there in my skivies, doing the 50's poodle skirt dance steps on the tip rail..... was HILARIOUS! Oldies are my weak spot-the DJ who puts on Nights in White Satin is the DJ who has my eternal admiration! The one custy who was at the bar came by after the set, dropped me a five, and said he was glad I was having so much fun! I felt good-i mean, THIS coming from a guy who had been ignoring me for the past half hour!(I was the only dancer, i think i spent about seven hours on stage that day without a break! Yuck!)

    I love it when dancers incorporate other styles of moves... makes it SOOO interesting to watch and learn from!

    Hehe sorry to get distracted!

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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    There are some excellent items in this thread, many from your coworker. Do a title search for air dance/s; there are quite a few threads with good advice.

  10. #10
    Lola Rose
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    Default Re: lapdancing... agh.

    Quote Originally Posted by VeganAvery View Post
    So I'm not too good at the whole lapdancing deal. I have tried to watch the other girls and see how they do it, ( i work at a no contact-full nude club) but it seems like they're stepping over the no contact rule with their dancing. Some girls will put both their knees on the customers knees/chair arms and then put their hands on their shoulders and rub all over them, or rub their butts all over the customers laps, or do this thing where they lean back and put their boobs up in the guys face... I'm just not comfortable doing that.

    So how do you give a lapdance that is enjoyable for the customer and not boring (what i do now is pretty much just start facing him, move my hips like i do when I bellydance and then turn around, maybe bend over a bit, and do the same thing.. repeat. boring) We're not allowed to touch ourselves either (breasts) but I see some girls playing with their boobs, squeezing them in front of the customer, rubbing them on the customer.. etc.

    agh. help. I seemed to do fine selling dances (and repeat dances) last night, but I need to mix it up a bit, I feel like I'm not doing it the right way.
    I admit that I might streatch the rules a little, but I don't go as far as some girls.... But as for touching yourself, I've always done it, and they never say anything. I squeeze my breasts together, pinch my nipples, run my hands up my body.... I think that's perfectly acceptable.

    I also get a little close then 12 inches, but I never touch. 12 inches is too far, imo. But 3-4 is acceptable, you won't get in trouble, and it'll make your dances more...... on the same level as other girls.

    The thread of mine Susan linked is really awesome, and it's helped me a lot.

    as for the rest, patience grasshopper. it comes with time.

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