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You have an intelligent process that works for you. In my metro area, dancers always collect after the dances. The very few who ask everyone for payment up front have typically been ripped off that week. It's easy to guess what happened.
When they recount the incident, I suggest a loss prevention model that makes them more attractive to honest customers. Hereafter, I will suggest your process and reasoning as well.
Theft of intimacy at whatever level can be traumatic. I try to have empathy for dancers, but I don't care enough to have thought about it the way you did.![]()
I prefer to get the money for the FIRST song upfront, not so much because of the ripoff risk, but because I don't know if the guy is going to be really grabby. I want the option to stop the dance at any time if he breaks the rules & not have to worry about haggling over the cost. After that, if we're continuing, I just collect all the remaining money at the end.
That said, I don't make a huge fuss about ALWAYS having to have the first $20 upfront, though I will insist on it if the guy has shown blatant signs of being touchy. Generally, though, if it fits with our flow to get the first dance upfront, great. Just saying that is my preference.
"Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins
"I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott
I very rarely ask a guy to pay up front. If I do he's probably been rude to me or is super wasted and I'm not sure if I will get paid.
Generally, the end of the dance/ dances is what's expected...
EXCEPT IN VIP
VIP is ALWAYS up front, esp where I'm from.
Oh, yeah, you don't want to hear me get started - and yet I will anyway. What makes me nuts on being ripped off is not so much the loss (it's seldom that much) it's that customers seem to view stealing from me as "not stealing"; like the act of paying me for the damn service is a fucking gift or something. Like, the money isn't really mine, I'm not really working, the money really belongs to whatever guy gave it to me, and some other guy is just going to make it up anyway. It makes me really, really mad. But - doesn't happen often, and I don't think I'm more suspicious afterwards. Just like - situations where I have a guy trying to make a deal with me - "Well, I only have $15...." "Well, okay, I'll see you another day..." "Wait..." blah blah blah "Okay, I do the $20 dance." "Okay - you just said you only had $15... I'm going to need you to pay me upfront." If he says no - I'm not likely to feel like I've lost business.
I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth
upfront before dances.
I typically would pay via money order or paypal...
People are not ruled by their memories.
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