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Thread: Major Body Slump

  1. #1
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Major Body Slump

    Urgggh, I'm in a real slump about my body image at the moment and can't seem to drag myself out of it.

    I had been working my butt off at the gym and eating so well for months, but I've really fallen to pieces over the last 2 weeks and have not worked out at all. I'm finding it hard to find motivation because I feel like it doesn't matter what I do, I'm always going to despise my body because my hips are always going to be huge so I'm always going to look fat. I can work out til I lose every single bit of fat on my body and I'm still going to be huge. Unless someone invents a way to surgically alter your bone structure so hips can be made smaller, I'm always going to HATE my body.

    I'm not sure what's triggered this bad slump but it's hard to stop feeling like this.

    Not really sure what the point of this was, I just wanted to rant

  2. #2
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Funny, I'm in the same place. I was working out, looking better, and feeling really great about it... and about two weeks ago I just quit going to the gym and can't bring myself to give a shit. All I see when I look in the mirror is jiggly flab everywhere and I gross myself out. I don't want to go to work, I just want to lie in bed in my sweatpants and K's big T-shirts. I'm trying to drag myself to the gym today but can't get motivated, even though I know I'll feel better if I go.

    If it's any consolation to you, there is no damn reason that you should feel that way. You do NOT look fat, you are slim and gorgeous. Your hips aren't "big," they are curvy and men LIKE that. Would you rather look like a teenage boy or something?

  3. #3
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    Would you rather look like a teenage boy or something?
    Well... yeah. I would. At least then I could get a boob job and I could fix it. There's NOTHING you can do for huge hips.

    But yeah that first paragraph you wrote is pretty much exactly how I'm feeling.

  4. #4
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    YOU DO NOT HAVE HUGE HIPS! You have hips, period. That is a GOOD thing. I have never, ever heard a heterosexual man complain about a woman's hips, except when she doesn't have any. You are female and hence curvy. That's why you make a killer living being sexy.

  5. #5
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    I had to buy new pants today. Although my size isn't that important for my current job, its kind of unsettling. But all of my pants are crushing my new extra tummy and hip flab, and giving me major camel toe.

    And I just can't get the motivation to go back to the gym or even call my trainer. And I've been eating a ton, mostly good stuff, a little junk. That's just my rant. My body looks horrible, but I'm not so upset. I just have to start doing something...soon, before I break 130 lbs. No more cocaine diet.

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  6. #6
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    But no matter how much weight I lose, my hips are still wide. And customers still tell me I'm fat/wide. I just hate it that my one body part that I despise more than any other is one of the only ones that it's impossible to change. If I hated my nose or my stomach or ears I could fix it with surgery. But you can't change your bones, and it really kills my motivation to work out and be healthy.

  7. #7
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Well, my problem area CAN be fixed and I still can't afford to fix it. My upper arms are huge and flabby and look like hams. No matter how much exercise and weight lifting I do, that's how they look. I used to be a size 4 with visible bones and I still couldn't wear anything sleeveless without looking like Bertha Butt. Lipozap would fix my arms, but I'll never be able to afford it.

    And I'm carrying 15 extra pounds in my belly and thighs right now too. I dunno what happened, I was feeling really hot and suddenly I just saw it. I can feel it jiggling when I walk and I'm disgusted with myself.

    Fuck it, okay, I'm going to the gym now.

  8. #8
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    It sucks that you can't afford it... but at least you know that one day, maybe, you will be able to. I feel like there's absolutely no hope for me.

    I'm going to try to go to the gym tomorrow.

  9. #9
    Kaylinn
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Darcy,
    Working out like crazy and eating right for the rest of your life won't make your hips go away. Your a woman, with a womanly figure. It's beautiful.
    But Nothing you can do will make it go away, so all you can do is learn to accept and love your hips.
    Otherwise, your just going to hate yourself forever, and possibly harm yourself trying to get rid of something you cannot change.
    The pic you posted with lilith in PP, your arms look really really thin. That was the first thing I noticed, and couldn't seem to focus on the rest of the picture.
    I don't know if you photoshopped that or not, but if you didn't, I think you are becoming to thin. I noticed a drastic weight loss from previous pics of you.
    I was very concerned, after seeing that pic, and now with this post, I am definatly concerned.

    Since diet or exercize cannot change what you hate about yourself, the only thing you can do is accept it and learn to like it. Your going to have to find a good psycologist to talk to, if that's what it is gonna take for you to learn to love yourself. But you HAVE to accept it, because it cannot change.

    I am envious of your body, I think it is perfect and beautiful. Your boobs are incredibly perfect, as is the rest of you. But no matter how many peopel tell you how perfect you are, if you dont think so, it don't really matter. No one's opinion matters but your own.

    I really think you have a disorder in the way you see yourself. You are not fat. Not even close. Yet you see yourself as fat, and said that even if you had no body fat whatsoever, yuo will always see yourself as fat because of your hips, which I dont even think are big at all, just womanly, not prepubescent, not stick straight. Your hips are the way they should be. Completly normal.

    I have big hips, I dont like them to much. I have a huge hourglass figure. The more weight I put on, the more hourglass y I get. I dont care for it...but its the way I am. Cant change how big God made my hips, so might as well acept it. Most people find it attractive to be built like a woman, and not a 13 year old child.

    Please don't become defensive about this post. I knwo you were just ranting, and probably didn't want to hear what I had to say, it just really bothers me that someoen so beautiful can hate herself so much. You deserve to be happier. You deserve to see yourself for what you really are, and love it, because it is perfect and beautiful.

  10. #10
    Darcy Foxx
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Heh in regards to my arms in that pic, I should point out that I have naturally extremely thin arms, hands, and fingers. Even when I was 25lbs heavier than I am now and rather chubby, my arms were still sticks and my fingers were skeletal. People at school sometimes used to joke and call me Skeletor because of my skinny arms and wrists and fingers.

  11. #11
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    ^^^ *wistful sigh*

  12. #12
    Kaylinn
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Quote Originally Posted by Darcy Foxx View Post
    Heh in regards to my arms in that pic, I should point out that I have naturally extremely thin arms, hands, and fingers. Even when I was 25lbs heavier than I am now and rather chubby, my arms were still sticks and my fingers were skeletal. People at school sometimes used to joke and call me Skeletor because of my skinny arms and wrists and fingers.

    But I still noticed a dramatic weight loss from previous pics.

  13. #13
    God/dess greenidlady1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Maybe you should work on your confidence insteed of your body so much because I think you are hot and I don't believe I am alone here.

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Ok I'm going to ask a rational question; why are you beating yourself up over it? Seriously. You're not fat, if you were you wouldn't have men paying for your site or shows. If you can't change your hips, and you accept that, then why continue to beat yourself up over it. That's like beating yourself up for being born brown hair. You need to get out of the cycle and just accept your body, stop trying to change it, accept it. It's a beautiful body. You need to stop feeding your unhealthy thoughts with threads like this, just bringing up the topic is making it more of a topic in your life. I hope this didn't sound too harsh.

  15. #15
    God/dess sxybrat07's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    I hear ya Darcy, I'm having the same problem. I eat junk, I feel like crap, and I don't hit the gym. Sometimes I feel ok, othertimes I feel like a fat lard. I know somewhere in my mind that I'm not, but it sucks to feel that way. I don't really have any advice, but I think you're beautiful
    I believe you Dottie and you have my support

  16. #16
    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Quote Originally Posted by sc0101 View Post
    Ok I'm going to ask a rational question; why are you beating yourself up over it? Seriously. You're not fat, if you were you wouldn't have men paying for your site or shows. If you can't change your hips, and you accept that, then why continue to beat yourself up over it. That's like beating yourself up for being born brown hair. You need to get out of the cycle and just accept your body, stop trying to change it, accept it. It's a beautiful body. You need to stop feeding your unhealthy thoughts with threads like this, just bringing up the topic is making it more of a topic in your life. I hope this didn't sound too harsh.
    I agree with both Green and SC on this one. Darcy, have you considered seeking a therapist? The view you have of yourself is unhealthy, and very damaging.







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  17. #17
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Also, I would suggest getting intensive treatment as soon as possible. Seriously. You are saying things that would make a psychiatry text book implode. You are headed down a dark and very bad place. You have a one way ticket. Lets get you a round trip. The longer you take to fix this, the more it's going to stick with you. It's up to you. Do you want to be happy? Then pick yourself by the boot straps, realize men pay to see you naked. Open your eyes. The longer you wait the more damage. Or you can wallow in irrational self pity and ruin your pretty little self. It's up to you Darcy, you have the power to change your life. I don't want to see you wallow.

  18. #18
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    I have to agree with SC here. Especially since you have tiny hips compared to me I know that what we see isn't going to convince you, and it isn't our opinions that will make you the $, but I seriously have no advice or anything of the like that will improve what I don't think needs improvement. I'm often quite worried for you, when you say that you think you're fat.
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  19. #19
    Veteran Member Cyndi08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    well since you lose weight evenly, nothing short of lipo will get rid of extra fat pockets on your hips... and even with your bone structure, you could still make it smaller with surgery

    i think you look amazing though. you don't need anything...

    in fact, i sometimes look at your pictures for motivation for myself!

    you're gorgeous

  20. #20
    buffie06
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    I think we have really similar body types, and I am finally comfortable in mine. I even love it now, and wouldn't change my hips for anything. I read in another post of yours, all of the nasty things people say to you(at work) and that sucks, but do you think it might be because of the signals you send out about your own feelings about your body? I dunno if that makes sense. Since you know you can't change your hips, try to embrace them. You are absolutely stunning and you must be confident, otherwise how could you do what you do? Life is so short, and I know looks are important, but when you are 45-50( or whatever) you will look back and wonder why you weren't just happy.

  21. #21
    Veteran Member Cyndi08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    ^^ ditto... just think of how many times people have commented your body at work.

    I KNOW there have been far more compliments than bashes... and even the bashes can be due to insecurity, shame, and other personal traits of the basher that you do not need to carry on your shoulders.

    We all have problems with the way we look. I look at the clothes I used to fit into and think to myself... "how could I think I was fat then?". That's just how we work.

    Hope you start feeling better, I really do think you are sexy.

  22. #22
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Older people who have been through life wonder why they spent so much time obsessing over their bodies when they were younger but instead should have enjoyed life more.

    I wish I could live by that idea.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
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  23. #23
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    ^^^ Well, to be perfectly fair, they weren't depending on their bodies for a living.

    I do agree that Darcy has a problem though. Girl, you are beautiful and many of the women on this forum would give anything to have your body. But you're getting too skinny and your revulsion for your perfectly normal female skeleton is not healthy at all.

  24. #24
    God/dess jaizaine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    Darcy please dont end up with an eating disorder. Obsessing esp with things that u cannot change (hips) can lead to ED's. I have lived with bulimia for about 6 years and I would not wish it on anybody. It's terrible.

    I think u r beautiful. But I do understand what it's like to be so focused on a part of you that you don't like. It consumes you, it's like u can think of nothing else.
    Maybe therapy could help with it?

    I tend to go through phases. Sometimes I think I look great and then I will go through a period where I hate the way that I look.

    I wish I had answers or ideas about how to fix it but I go through it myself so I guess I can just offer understanding.

  25. #25
    Veteran Member scarletfang's Avatar
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    Default Re: Major Body Slump

    i want to tell you that you're insane, and that i'd kill for a body like yours, but i know that's probably pointless because what matters is what you think...i feel the same way about my hips more often than not, but i'm slowly learning to live with them...i'm a long way from love, but i'm accepting that i can't change them...part of the acceptance was writing a really bitchy email to my mom, sarcastically thanking her for my bone structure (so far i've refrained from sending it)...i also try to focus on the parts of my that i like when i start feeling gross...so what if my hips are a little big? i'll just draw attention elsewhere...

    even if you don't like your hips, from the pictures that i've seen, you have gorgeous skin, beautiful eyes, and some of the nicest legs i've ever seen!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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