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Thread: Is it about power?

  1. #1
    admirer52
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    Default Is it about power?

    Often on this forum dancers will say, "We're not special, we're just ordinary girls." Well, the fact is you are special, and I think deep down most of you know it. I wonder if some of the satisfaction from your profession comes not only from knowing you are special but from having such hypnotic control over men. Your boldness, your sensuality, your beauty, your nudity, turn customers into blithering fools. They desire you, you are unattainable, yet you can tease and tempt them into parting with vast sums of money and coming back repeatedly for more of the same fantasy. I remember two dancers performing together on stage in g-strings, doing a very sexy hip-bump dance, in front of filled seats at the tip rail, and one saying to the other, "We look sooo good and they can't have us." Is there almost as much satisfaction in that level of control than in what you earn?

  2. #2
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Of course many of us find it empowering. That's a huge part of what makes it hot.

    But then, I get off on being a little cocktease, so.

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    Veteran Member Cyndi08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Yes, it is empowering. That's the point most of the strippers are trying to make. It's not enslavement, it's not obligatory or a job used for a lack of better options. It's like modeling. Don't you think it's empowering for them to walk down a runway and be oohed and awed at? Same thing with actresses and the red carpet.... sex appeal sells and everyone likes to be desired in some way or another.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Ugh, read some more about the dancer's complaints and what we put up with to make that money. Lots of abusive pricks and fucktards. Its not always so empowering.

    And sorry to say, but strippers are NOT special, although many of the lovely ladies on this site are very unique and dear to me. I just spent time in a place convincing an average 17 year old girl to NOT be a stripper at 18, as she has a propensity to smoke meth and suck-off guys in bathrooms.

    OTOH, strippers aren't subjagated abused victims who don't know any better either. There are cases like this, and there are cases of the "powerful she-warrior stripper" who never takes shit from any man. But for the most part, there is a vast middle ground.

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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    From a customers point of view, id say the girl has the "power" only if she is:
    1. Extremely fine and worth looking at
    2. Know how to move that booty, if they cant do this then their "hotness" cancels out
    3. Mutual respectful/non b.s. attitude.

    *If the girl satisfies all the 3 of these requirements, she has the "power" to make me spend my paper.

  6. #6
    zxcire
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Oh, yes, it's about power...but IMO it's about a balance of power. Sure we get men to spend money on us...and *they* actually hold the power from the moment they walk in the door until they've spent the money on us. They get us to sit, talk, flirt, touch, as we feel out their monetary situation.

    If he spends, it is at this point the balance shifts to the dancer because we are able to walk away and end the fantasy.

    I think that makes sense...?
    Last edited by zxcire; 06-09-2007 at 11:18 AM. Reason: durrr, spelling.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackSheEp3 View Post
    From a customers point of view, id say the girl has the "power" only if she is:
    1. Extremely fine and worth looking at
    2. Know how to move that booty, if they cant do this then their "hotness" cancels out
    3. Mutual respectful/non b.s. attitude.

    *If the girl satisfies all the 3 of these requirements, she has the "power" to make me spend my paper.
    Wow, you're retarded.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    The dancers *always* have the power. From the moment a guy walks in the door, he is submitting to US. Whether he wants to admit it or not, whether he likes it or not, whether he knows it or not. WE have the power - it's just a matter of realizing it and using it. The dancer who learns this is a dancer who will go faaaaarr in this business


    For me, hell yes it's about power. I power trip all night long at work. Hell I power trip on the ride home and sometimes the next day, remembering how I made some schmuck drool, empty his wallet into my garter and then walk to the ATM (or sometimes his friends) to get MORE money for me. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    We are absolutely just women, but we are not ordinary. I have never said I was ordinary.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post
    The dancers *always* have the power. From the moment a guy walks in the door, he is submitting to US. Whether he wants to admit it or not, whether he likes it or not, whether he knows it or not. WE have the power - it's just a matter of realizing it and using it. The dancer who learns this is a dancer who will go faaaaarr in this business
    Absolutely, they shouldn't even try to fight it.
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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    I've seen it both ways.

    The very fine, self-confident woman who exudes power and a hypnotic effect on men from the stage and at their tables.

    The desperate, weak-willed woman who crumbles in to pressure and a perceived necessity to enslave herself sexually, quite often to get the crack or meth.

    The latter type is far more common in the nastier clubs than in the nicer ones, but you see relatively less powerful women to some extent in both. And sure enough, the ones who tell me they have to make a certain amount by the end of the night to pay rent or some sort of urgent bill, frequently let the necessity of their situation rob them of the power they might ordinarily have.

    And there's all the myriad stages between. I have even seen a few who are accustomed to wielding power, yielding it and stooping to the level of the powerless. That is a very sad sight, too.

    Looks don't always guarantee power, either. Some of the most self-confident dancers I have ever seen haven't been all that much to look at. The finest dancer I have ever worked with, in terms of looks and sheer grace, was relatively powerless.


    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post
    WE have the power - it's just a matter of realizing it and using it. The dancer who learns this is a dancer who will go faaaaarr in this business ...

    We are absolutely just women, but we are not ordinary. I have never said I was ordinary.
    That I will agree with, the ordinary woman can't just jump onstage and strip down, or take a guy into the lapdance area.

    Though I have seen many powerless women in the business, it wouldn't take all that much of a shift in attitude to regain the initiative. You try to open their eyes to it, and sometimes it works, or they figure it out on their own. I love seeing this happen.
    Last edited by Djoser; 06-09-2007 at 01:07 PM.
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    Of course many of us find it empowering. That's a huge part of what makes it hot.

    But then, I get off on being a little cocktease, so.
    Oh really? Now I feel like at least ONE of us is enjoying that quality of yours.

    RE: Ordinary.

    Ordinary is relative. It's a question of what the person you are looking at sees versus what you WANT them to see.

    Honestly I hate the use of the term. What is an "ORDINARY" woman? Or an "ORDINARY" man? (Same with Regular) I see em all the time, it's typically just before I get to know them. But a regular girl to me, could be a princess in the right crowds.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  12. #12
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Djoser, the only thing between a stripper (or any woman, for that matter) and her power is her own realization of it. We all have it. We just have to realize it and learn to use it.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    B, didn't you watch the video in Blue about penis power? My god, the truth was self-evident

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Veteran Member datchapin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Ordinary is a funny word. Most words are. I always find it funny when I hear the compliment extraordinary. You know what I mean? Yes, let me pay you a compliment by telling you that your extra normal. Anyways, what makes a person special? That they're different, unique? Who isn't? I think everyone is special in their own way, but saying someone is special... does that mean they're more special than others? Sorry, just rambling. lol.

    Seriously though, strippers. It's just a job the way I see it. OTC the strippers are girls and go about their business in the same manner as the rest of the girls of the world. I think what sets them apart is that when they work they operate in a special ethical arena. I mean what sets them apart is that they made the choice to strip. Like DJoser said, strippers come in all shapes and sizes and IMO some of them should not be in the business. Having said all that I think one of the qualities that sets them apart is fortitude. Emotional, physical and mental. JMO.

    As far as the power thing, I think the special ethical arenas thing is what applies here. I mean guys come in (in most cases.) to spend money and get dances. The power of persuasion is limited. Any girl can attest to the assholes or cheapskates that refuse to get dances. In those instances who holds the power? The guys came in watched you for free and theres nothing the girls can do to make them compensate for that show. (Nothing wrong w/ that I guess, but does this power struggle have anything to do with how much girls hate guys like this. Like these guys don't make them feel empowered.) Even when in LD land the girls never have all the power. Like someone said it's no enslavement. So these chicks have to watch their boundaries as well in order to syphon as much money as they can. To me it's all about mutual respect in the LD area. If the dancer abuses that power and crosses the boundaries the session will end. Same thing with the custie, cross the line and fun times over. It's my opinion that the "power" is shared. I mean nothing wrong with feeling empowered, matter of fact that's great. In this case however, I just can't see where one side is the "power side."

    Just saying.
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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    "Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely". A little wisdom every PL should consider before he puts his ATF up on a pedestal.

    It is rather hot to see a woman aware of her sexuality and not afraid to use it to its fullest potential. Sadly, most women, including most strippers, do not fit the bill. Anymore, you gotta figuratively konk a dancer over the head to get her to read your mind.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Um, those cheap non-paying guys don't get shit from me. If I were afraid of some dude seeing me naked I wouldn't strip at all. I give them nothing. I still have the power.

    FBR, that broad yall were making fun of on blue was a dumbass. Even you guys made fun of her

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by BlackSheEp3 View Post
    From a customers point of view, id say the girl has the "power" only if she is:
    1. Extremely fine and worth looking at
    2. Know how to move that booty, if they cant do this then their "hotness" cancels out
    3. Mutual respectful/non b.s. attitude.

    *If the girl satisfies all the 3 of these requirements, she has the "power" to make me spend my paper.
    Well in that case, gimme all your money







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    Veteran Member datchapin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post
    Um, those cheap non-paying guys don't get shit from me. If I were afraid of some dude seeing me naked I wouldn't strip at all. I give them nothing. I still have the power.

    FBR, that broad yall were making fun of on blue was a dumbass. Even you guys made fun of her
    How? You didn't get shit from them, yet you danced for their entertainment. You say you give em' nothing? You saying the effort and talent you put forth on the stage is nothing? Pardon me, but from what I've read and seen on this site, you seem like an amazing individual and me thinks that would translate to your stage performance. I imagine your stage performance is far from nothing. So you did give them something. IMO.

    Or am I wrong and you consider your performance nothing?
    The more I see, the less I know, the more I like to let it go! - RHCP

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette View Post
    Djoser, the only thing between a stripper (or any woman, for that matter) and her power is her own realization of it. We all have it. We just have to realize it and learn to use it.
    Truer words have never been spoken. And there's nothing I love better than seeing a woman use it. That's why one of my all-time favorite songs is "The Power is Mine", LOA.


    Datchapin, Bridgette does indeed put on a spectacular show, just ask the pizza guys in Key West, lol.

    But dancers go onstage when their turn comes up, regardless of whether some guys in the crowd are cheap or not. So she is giving them nothing. Their existence is immaterial, unless they are wise enough to pay tribute to her power.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by datchapin View Post
    How? You didn't get shit from them, yet you danced for their entertainment. You say you give em' nothing? You saying the effort and talent you put forth on the stage is nothing?
    Its a wee bit hard for a dancer to find potential paying customers if they can't see the merchandise. Much like any other sales venue, a few lurkers are going to come in and mooch the free samples. Small price to pay as long as someone in the crowd is paying. Nothing in that precludes a dancer from minimizing her exposure to the non-buyers as much as she possibly can.

    Personally, I think people in this business who get too wrapped up in the power aspect are doing themselves a great disservice.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Senior Member KentuckyMysteryMan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    They are just ordinary girls. Way to put the pussy on a pedestal Admirer52. Yes ordinary because all women, strippers or not, try to get power over guys and get him to spend money on them. Ordinary.

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    What you guys are missing is that the use of power does not have to be for selfish means. It can and should be a win/win situation.

    A woman is beautiful, she moves with consummate grace and flawless timing. She is using her feminine power to entertain those who are willing to pay for the pleasure of seeing it (and experiencing it more closely with private dances).

    The men do not have to lose anything, or consider themselves inferior in any way. I certainly don't, and I tip well whenever I go into a stripclub. I am powerful as well, but I am showing my appreciation for the erotic arts.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Quote Originally Posted by doc-catfish View Post
    Personally, I think people in this business who get too wrapped up in the power aspect are doing themselves a great disservice.
    I agree. I guess it's like the old saying about happiness being like the butterfly, elusive if pursued directly. Do a good job, focus on what you are doing, be honest, fair, and good feelings follow.

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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Datchapin, I do a decent stage show, but that doesn't mean I give anything to the cheapos. Like I said, if we were afraid of people seeing us naked we wouldn't be strippers. Djoser's got it -since we go onstage when our turn comes regardless of whether someone is paying or not, we aren't giving anything to the guys who don't pay. Merely seeing us dance isn't really "getting" anything because everyone in the club sees it too. Doc also has a point: Stage is kinda like our commercial - someone watching the commercial but not buying the product isn't taking anything from the company who made the commercial even if you really enjoyed watching the commercial because you're not getting the product, only seeing the ad.


    Also doc, knowing you have the power and knowing how to use it is not getting all wrapped up in it, and definitely not hurting anything. You can rest assured the guys who realize what power I have over them are thoroughly enjoying every second of it, as much as I am

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Veteran Member Cyndi08's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it about power?

    Djoser, I completely agree.

    When a woman feels sexually powerful, the men benefit. Those confident girls hopping around the club all joyful and full of sex appeal feel that way because they feel empowered and admired. And, men respond to it.

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