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Thread: ITC to OTC Relationships

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    Default ITC to OTC Relationships

    I have a question about a question about a dancer I've known for a couple of months.

    We have great conversations and a fun time in the club. We've always been very comfortable together and she usually comes back to my table between other dances. Nothing unusual there. I've never sought anything beyond that.

    The other night, she gave me her phone number (not a dancer phone; but one with her real name on Caller ID.) I know this because she actually showed me her driver's license (long story.) We shared some nice kisses ITC. She suggested meeting for dinner / lunch. So...I called; and she didn't return my call.

    What do you make of this? She doesn't seem to be hustling me and I don't see how she would gain by this approach. I didn't seek anything OTC and would have been happy with her excellent company ITC. Playing around this way just seems likely to irritate a good customer.

    What would you do next?

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    Member accball's Avatar
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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Don't sweat it; continue with life. Be busy.

    Continue to see her but don't bring it up that she's flaky as hell. Act like she never brushed you off. Just keep the interaaction playful and fun.

    If you want to initiate, something else, have her "tag along" and don't make it a date.

    If she doesn't call back, her loss.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    What do you make of this?
    She didn't call you back. Does this really require an explanation?

    Incidentally, it's generally considered bad form for you to call her first, even if she offered her number. Inside the clubs, the dancers do the choosing. "Choosing" means she will call or text you herself. This is particularly true if anything is really going to happen OTC.

    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    What would you do next?
    Smile.

    What you've experienced is an extremely common form of SS. It's a rather more aggressive attempt to make you feel special and different and the hope is that you'll come in more often to see her, with you expecting that her OTC offer will eventually materialize. It won't. If she were really interested in you, there wouldn't be the slightest question about it, and it would have already happened.

    Sorry, but the regular rules do not apply in strip clubs. It's a wonderful house of mirrors once you learn how to play the game, though.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    What do you make of this?

    That she's not very bright. It's stupid for a dancer to BRING UP the idea of OTC with a regular if she has no intention of following through.
    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    Playing around this way just seems likely to irritate a good customer.

    Precisely.
    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    What would you do next?
    I definitely wouldn't create any drama over it. I would, perhaps, mention it to her casually the next time I saw her. And if she encouraged me, I might give it ONE more try. And if she flaked again, I'd drop it.

    But I wouldn't necessarily drop her! It would depend on how much I enjoyed her in the club. It sounds as if you enjoy her a lot.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Quote Originally Posted by The Other Owner View Post
    She didn't call you back. Does this really require an explanation?
    Have to agree there. Even outside of the strip club sometimes women give out their number and then change their mind. I have done it before, seemed like a good idea at the time. Then I just ignored the calls until the guy eventually gave up.

    My advise would be do not bother calling her again. If she wanted to talk she would return your call.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Lots of dancers have the mindset that it's still "BUSINESS" even while meeting OTC on a platonic or non-platonic level with "custies" they met at a club. Once $$$ is exchanged ITC, it is hard to overcome the BUSINESS aspect, even though there maybe some sincere mutual hopes of cultivating a PERSONAL relationship... Keep the motto in mind that there is very little PERSONAL in BUSINESS with many dancers ITC or OTC, & if it develops to where your both comfortable on more of a PERSONAL level both ITC and OTC then so be it, but the odds are stacked against you.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Quote Originally Posted by IrRegular View Post
    I have a question about a question about a dancer I've known for a couple of months.

    We have great conversations and a fun time in the club. We've always been very comfortable together and she usually comes back to my table between other dances. Nothing unusual there. I've never sought anything beyond that.

    The other night, she gave me her phone number (not a dancer phone; but one with her real name on Caller ID.) I know this because she actually showed me her driver's license (long story.) We shared some nice kisses ITC. She suggested meeting for dinner / lunch. So...I called; and she didn't return my call.

    What do you make of this? She doesn't seem to be hustling me and I don't see how she would gain by this approach. I didn't seek anything OTC and would have been happy with her excellent company ITC. Playing around this way just seems likely to irritate a good customer.

    What would you do next?
    The next time you go to the club buy some dancers from another dancer, preferably one of her friends. Also act like she never brushed you off. When the SS stars flowing it time to move on.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Quote Originally Posted by The Other Owner View Post

    ...it's generally considered bad form for you to call her first, even if she offered her number. Inside the clubs, the dancers do the choosing. "Choosing" means she will call or text you herself. This is particularly true if anything is really going to happen OTC.

    ...What you've experienced is an extremely common form of SS. It's a rather more aggressive attempt to make you feel special and different and the hope is that you'll come in more often to see her, with you expecting that her OTC offer will eventually materialize. It won't. If she were really interested in you, there wouldn't be the slightest question about it, and it would have already happened.

    Sorry, but the regular rules do not apply in strip clubs. It's a wonderful house of mirrors once you learn how to play the game, though.
    I couldn't agree more. How much fun you have in a strip club really depends on how quickly you figure these things out...
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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    If she were really interested in you, there wouldn't be the slightest question about it, and it would have already happened.
    Agreed.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Thanks for the interesting replies.

    I've had a few women give me their numbers and not return my call before in regular life. Of course, we JUST MET in those cases. I figure I'm probably lucky they didn't call me in the long run.

    The dancer in question is a very intelligent person; it's one of the things I like about her. She's also quite popular at the club. So, I'm flattered she put some extra, if unnecessary, effort into me.

    I can't resist giving her a little tease or two about it next time I see her though. Beyond that, we're cool.

    On a serious note, I do hope she's really careful about giving out personal info to people she doesn't know very well. It seems like a rather risky practice.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    If you are trying to pick up strippers, you better not try it ITC. These women are too smart to shit where they eat. They won't fuck up their money flow man.

    Man, and she wasn't putting extra effort into YOU. She was putting effort into your money! Why do guys not understand this? They don't want YOU, they want your MONEY!

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    My first thought was; had she been drinking?

    I've had dancers do that very thing after they had been drinking a while. Then the next day I suspect they think better of it and don't return the call.

    Just forget it happened and have a good time in the club.

    Rick

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    Imo you dont find your future g/f in the strip club, but you can find your potential stripper g/f outside of the club.

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    Default Re: ITC to OTC Relationships

    IDK anything is possible. sometimes it takes a long time for them to get past the 'i dont date custies' personal promise.

    tell her you thought of something she would be interested in (besides banging her). she might flake towards your direction.

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