Ok he said it casually. Like "love you" as he was leaving.
*Shudders*
Has it happened to you ladies?
It's creepy.





Ok he said it casually. Like "love you" as he was leaving.
*Shudders*
Has it happened to you ladies?
It's creepy.




I just say awh thankyou!
Sounds to me like he meant it more in a casual way....like how you would tell a good friend you love them. Obviously the fact that he is a regular makes his affections alittle misplaced but he probably doesnt "get" that....
Anyway be careful on how you handle this. Last time I had a regular tell me he was in love with me and wanted to date me, I kinda told him in a not so sugar coated way that it would never happen. Not only did I make that mistake but I also said that I thought him saying that was innappropriate because now it seemed like he had an agenda aside from just being my friend. Less that 2 weeks later, I got traded in for a younger model and I dont even talk to him anymore.



I think he is testing the water, Jaizaine. Men live in such guarded places: usually they say "I love you" by metaphor--like they fix the screen door without your asking or try to forward some other kindness; when they actually say the words it means either that they've come to trust you with this, and it is a major thing--or they know the words will get your attention and they are probing for the possibility of greater intimacy. So I agree with echo above, that you need to be careful about it, and maybe just brushing it off kindly, as Bellasera suggests, is the way to go for now. But I think it bears watching because you felt creepy about it, and it is worth paying attention to your instincts.
JK Jim
I think it's incredibly creepy. Like I get that we can be confusing - like we really like you, but only for certain purposes etc. etc - but if they are breaking out "love" words I think it is showing a pretty serious disconnect from - reality, you know? That's out of the realm of confusion and into hallucinations.
I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth





My wealthy regular says it to me every day. We talk on the phone daily. He expects me to say it to him too.
A good well off regular who really spends money on you, sends you money, and takes you shopping is not a hobbyist. He probably never really got into the strip club thing, but is unhappy at home and has fallen for a stripper. You just have to string it out as long as it lasts.
Yeah, I have a reg that does this. It does creep me out, however he is saving my ass right now, so I'll deal with it. He also told me his life long dream is to marry a blonde...oh goody for me.
I believe you Dottie and you have my support



My biggest worry, Jaizaine, is that you said it creeps you out--your instinct is telling you something is wrong, and there is no reward worth fanning that flame.
JK Jim
When someone does this to me, I go "I love........ cake"
Many times. I usually just go, "awww"
If you think school is hard, try being stupid.




i hear that pretty oftenand generally respond with an, "aw, you're so sweet." hug. change subject.
i do find it a bit icky though...but then i'm sort of uncomfortable with the L word in general anyway.
I totally agree. People say this to me ALL the time... You know, we're in VIP, champagne has been flying, and they say, "You're the best girl I've ever met! I totally love you!" to which I respond, "oh my gosh you're so awesome I love you too!"
That kind of I love you is funny, appropriate and okay.
You are the only person who can figure out wether this guy is creepy, or not. Use your instincts. If he's freaking you out, it's for a reason. Stay away from him. It isn't worth the money to have a serious stalker problem.





I think he probably just meant it in passing. I have accidentally said 'love you' as I was getting off the phone to random ass people. I just usually use the phone to call family so much I completely forget I'm talking to a coworker.
Look like a woman
Think like a man
Act like a lady
Work like a dog
- My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success





love you too, sweetie...
I love my job.
I love my cat.
I love sunsets.
I love the color orange.
I love computers.
I love sleeping in.
I love certain dancers.
But I'm not IN love with them.
I got back from work and HAD to post in this thread after what happened at work today!
A customer I've never danced for came in and bought a few dances. Ya'll, I swear I'm not lieng. Within those few songs, this man told me he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, he wanted to share everything with me, all bacause I "saw things the way he did". All the while, he looked like he was seriously gonna bust out crieng he was so emotional about it. Thing is, he comes in ALL the time and this was the first time I've formally met him. He had to been on something, seriously.





The guy Buffi and I share has said this to me....and I'm wondering if sxybrat has met this same guy? lol... It creeps me out too, I usually just smile and say "oh, that's sweet.... more dances then?"


Yeah, him telling you that he loves you and that he wants to see you OTC is known as Customer Shit (CS).
CS is passive aggressive behavior used by the customer to control, degrade, or mind-fuck the dancer.
Like SS, he doesn't really mean what he says. He doesn't REALLY love you, of course, he's just fucking with you in a passive aggressive way. It's basically anger expressed toward the dancer in hidden form.
Customers who tip on stage and say shit like: hey, I want to fuck you, take you home, or they love you, etc., are examples of minor CS which are meant to annoy the dancer.
And of course, there's going to be exceptions to the rule. Sure, there's going to be some clown who's tipping you on stage who says he wants to fuck you, and he really means it.
^That was insightful, because for a minute there I thought the guy who met me all of four minutes ago and has only seen me in my thong and doesn't even know my name REALLY did love me....Thank goodness!
I actually really appreciate this observation. It's very true!
My most hated CS is when customers ask you out and become offended when you gracefully decline and say "I don't date customers". They make it personal and want an explanation why you're such a bitch and why they're not good enough for you. ANNOYS ME TO NO END. You aren't going to change my mind by analyzing why I turned you down!



I had a guy try to guilt trip me the other day, about how I led him on making him think I would date him just to get his money. Uh, duh, I'm sorry I'm good at my job. He was actually hurt though, about how great of a "relationship" we could have had. I just told him I guess I didn't feel as strongly about him as he did about me. Like, he felt 100% crazy for me and I felt like 5% you are an acceptable human being.
What I really wanted to say was, "I have had a serious bf this entire time and never had the intention of dating you. And you can't sue over it, so from now on, buyer beware." Morons. There should be a sign on the door or something, saying that no matter what a dancer does, it does not mean she has feelings for you. She has feelings for your ability to pay her rent.
I had a guy recently start saying this alot. I just say aw you're so sweet. And he is ok with that.
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