. . . other girlfriend in the head, though - who knew they were that flexible? I guess that . . .
. . . other girlfriend in the head, though - who knew they were that flexible? I guess that . . .
.. a little castration is in order, so I took out my rusty pair of pliers....
. . . and went to work. By the time I sobered up . . .





...I didn't know what to make of my project. Apparently, it's much more difficult to...
. . . turn into a woman than southpark led me to beleive. At least . . .


I now know that I enjoy excruciating pain. Which caused me. . .
don't hate the player hate the game......





...to put Paris Hilton's self-titled 2006 CD release on auto-repeat at high volume. Then, having guaranteed myself hours of agony, I...
...was feeling quite rambunctious. I recalled the sensation of my most relevant pair of pantaloons billowing about my posterior, and knew at that moment I needed to embark upon a quest to...





...locate that most elusive of prizes. Yes, indeed, you guessed it: "The Platinum...
....they told me I didn't qualify. So instead I decided to....
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
-His reply
"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
-David Daye
...work at the night shift at Taco Bell to pay for a sex change operation. I decided to go to the doctor who told me,...





...that moonlighting at Taco Bell would be a slow way to pay for a sex flip. Dr. Feelgood suggested that I consider...









...go down on Phyllis Diller! Even the crack of dawn is turning me on, because...
...At least it ain't hairy, and I've always been a butt man. But enough wanking! I'm a busy guy, and today I've got to perfect my dogie-roping, so that I can...




...presidency. Yo Monica! Bring me some...
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
-His reply
"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
-David Daye





of that sweet fine booty of yours over here, to me. Hmm... now I feel like....
enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount





...do pooka's laundry in the nude except for a pirate hat. Only because I...
...wear an eyepatch wearing a spiffy hat and say GARRRRRR!. But instead I'm going to....
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
-His reply
"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
-David Daye





....move a bunch of chickens their cages to different cages. I worry about their sharp talons...
...because they remind of the time I got drunk and slept with this girl name Phallon. I talked to her the next day and she said...









...an instructional DVD for those who lack sexual skills. The title of my tutorial is...
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