Results 1 to 18 of 18

Thread: So sad....

  1. #1
    Kaylinn
    Guest

    Default So sad....

    Just something that really made me sad today.

    My cousin died last year in a motorcycle accident. He was going 85 down a street, when a car did a u turn in front of him. He tried to lay the bike down...but he hit the pavment at 85mph. No helmet. He was killed instantly.

    Anyway...I was talking to my aunt( his mom) this morning, and we started talking about the accident. She said she had the accident report, and she knew exactly how he died. ( warning. Gross details ahead) When he hit the pavment, his head cracked down the middle from his forehead to the base of his neck. Brain matter spilled onto the pavment. His aorta was severed, as well as most of his internal organs, and a lot of broken bones.

    I told her that she never should have read the accident report. That is just to much detail to know what happened to your child.

    This is the sad part. She said, " I knew every inch of his body. I knew each mole and freckle on him, and I now I know how every inch got broken when he died."

    It just made me cry...so sad....

    Although it was a closed casket funeral, due to the damage, close family got a viewing before they closed it. I wil lnever in my life forget how he looked, like humpty dumpty after he got put togetehr again. Things just weren't where they belonged.

    Please. Wear a helmet, and ride responsibly. A bike is a very powerful piece of equipment, and you need to respect that power and not take it for granted. Ride carefully and responsibly.

  2. #2
    madmaxine
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....



    Wow, this is so sad. I'm sorry.
    If it's any consolation, some peoples' sole purpose in life is to prevent the kind of anguish your family experienced. My friend's brother works at a mortuary (embalmer & makeup artist) so he works very hard to make sure the decedents look presentable. The saying goes that "funerals are for the living and not the dead."

    Someone said it's "cold comfort" for parents to know things like you described. I can honestly say I've lost sleep over the fear of that (something happening to my loved ones). That scares me more than my death.

  3. #3
    Kaylinn
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....

    ^^ When you hit the pavment at 85 with no helmet..there's only so much you can do to make the body look "presentable"

    They did the best they could, but were only able to rearrange his face so much.

    And as for "cold comfort" I dont think so. I think it's more of this need to know desire that you regret as soon as you know. I'm sure, if I were in the situation, i would want to know every last detail. You want to know if your loved ones sufferend much, if it was painless, what exactly happened..could he have lived? Was there any chance at all? So many questions you want answered. But really..some things are better left unknown. Noone needs to know their child's brain matter was scraped off the road. That is just information best left unknown, in my opinion anyway.

  4. #4
    madmaxine
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....

    I do understand...Some families refuse to read the coroner's report. But then some families (like Pat Tillman's, which is where the "cold comfort" thought originated) need to know...

    On a related note, my older brother was a in a bad motorcycle wreck in 1991 and he surivived with little long-term damage....It makes me sad that he didn't appreciate his luck- he's a crackhead now. Seriously, he literally got a free pass from God & he blew it. Which is why I say, "Life's A Bitch."

  5. #5
    Kaylinn
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....

    "Life's A Bitch."
    Yeah...that about sums it up.

  6. #6
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,427
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 30 Times in 22 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    Quote Originally Posted by madmaxine View Post
    On a related note, my older brother was a in a bad motorcycle wreck in 1991 and he surivived with little long-term damage....It makes me sad that he didn't appreciate his luck- he's a crackhead now. Seriously, he literally got a free pass from God & he blew it. Which is why I say, "Life's A Bitch."
    eek. i know a girl who survived cancer and she still smokes. its like shes tempting fate. not exactly the same, but you know what i mean.

  7. #7
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jan 2007
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    718
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    I'm sorry your family has gone through all of this--what a terrible thing.

    I lost a friend of mine in a fire some time ago. I could hardly bear thinking of her last moments (a neighbor in a condominium down below left a candle going and at four in the morning the whole building went up). I finally realized that I had to remember her doing the things she loved--mountain climbing, teaching--and eventually these memories replaced the tough ending in my head. I still think of the ending from time to time, but my sense is of her happy and at peace--and this is of course how she would want to be remembered.

    I know how tough a go this is, so you and his mother are in my thoughts.
    JK Jim

  8. #8
    God/dess Embyr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Schlong Beach, Cauliflower
    Posts
    2,558
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 14 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    Fuck...

    Kaylinn, reading this made me tear up... Plenty of my friends have been injured in accidents, although no one has died... but their friends and family members have.

    This is why "no-helmet" laws can go to hell. I would never think about climbing on the bike without a helmet. If it's any consolation, at least he died instantly... probably without pain. Although the grusomeness of his death doesn't help, he didn't feel any of that... thank god. In a way, the fact that he was speeding probably helped... if he was going any slower it may not have been so instantaneous.

    And my cousin died last year, too... he was 23. So I know how you feel. There is nothing worse than a young life lost.

  9. #9
    God/dess Embyr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Schlong Beach, Cauliflower
    Posts
    2,558
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 14 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    Quote Originally Posted by britt244 View Post
    eek. i know a girl who survived cancer and she still smokes. its like shes tempting fate. not exactly the same, but you know what i mean.
    I don't think riding a motorcycle is tempting fate. I think riding a motorcycle without proper protection (leathers/helmet/back-padding, etc.) is tempting fate. I thnk speeding and unnecessary lane-splitting just to be a jerk or piss someone off is tempting fate. I think pulling wheelies down the freeway is tempting fate, although I know people who have been doing this for years and have complete control and would be able to react appropriately if something unexpected happened. I think riding drunk is DEFINITELy tempting fate.

    Basically, riding w/out protection, riding outside of your limits, or riding like a squid (taking unnecessary risks w/ yourself, your bike, or others) is tempting fate.

    But... it's still usually the car's fault. Which sucks.

  10. #10
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,427
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 30 Times in 22 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    ^ huh? i meant in response to madmaxines brother almost dying and then smoking crack. like my friend almost died of cancer and she still smokes.. like if somebody had skin cancer and lived but still went to the tanning bed every day. i didnt mean riding a motorcycle!

  11. #11
    Kaylinn
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....

    Quote Originally Posted by Embyr View Post
    I don't think riding a motorcycle is tempting fate. I think riding a motorcycle without proper protection (leathers/helmet/back-padding, etc.) is tempting fate. I thnk speeding and unnecessary lane-splitting just to be a jerk or piss someone off is tempting fate. I think pulling wheelies down the freeway is tempting fate, although I know people who have been doing this for years and have complete control and would be able to react appropriately if something unexpected happened. I think riding drunk is DEFINITELy tempting fate.

    Basically, riding w/out protection, riding outside of your limits, or riding like a squid (taking unnecessary risks w/ yourself, your bike, or others) is tempting fate.

    But... it's still usually the car's fault. Which sucks.
    I agree with you. First of all, a motorcycle driver must drive for everyone elswe on the road. He has to be so much more aware of traffic and cautious, becasue most cars either don't care or don't know how to respect a biker.
    It usually is the cars fault.
    And I agree with you that riding in general isn't tempting fate, it's riding uneducated or stupidly.

    That doesn't change the fact that my boyfriend wanting a bike scares the hell out of me. I wish I could forbid him from buying one, because even tho I knwo what a good rider he is...everyone else on the road scares me. But I also could never forbit him from doing somethign that gives him so much joy.
    Sucks either way.

  12. #12
    God/dess Embyr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Schlong Beach, Cauliflower
    Posts
    2,558
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 14 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    Quote Originally Posted by britt244 View Post
    ^ huh? i meant in response to madmaxines brother almost dying and then smoking crack. like my friend almost died of cancer and she still smokes.. like if somebody had skin cancer and lived but still went to the tanning bed every day. i didnt mean riding a motorcycle!
    britt i understood what you meant- i was just bringing up another point... many people do see bikes as "fate on wheels."

    Quote Originally Posted by Kaylinn View Post
    That doesn't change the fact that my boyfriend wanting a bike scares the hell out of me. I wish I could forbid him from buying one, because even tho I knwo what a good rider he is...everyone else on the road scares me. But I also could never forbit him from doing somethign that gives him so much joy.
    Sucks either way.
    Yikes, esp. after your experiences (brother and cousin) I'd feel weird about another guy close to me riding, too! The best thing you can do? Make sure he's not only a good rider, but fully ride-ready EVERY time. I don't care if he's just going to the grocery store... A girl I worked with had a cousin who was killed that way... picking up meat on his bike & hit, ended up like your cousin... but yeah, make sure he's wearing leather, boots, padding, etc., every time. NO T-SHIRTS. I don't care how warm it is... there's no excuse for risking your life.

    I wear the following EVERY time I go out:
    ,
    as well as the helmet and gloves in my avatar.

    If I'm doing a canyon ride or even extensive freeways, I'll wear my new full-suit leathers:


    I don't care how much of a dork I am, but I think it looks hot... most importantly, it decreases the risk of fatality.

  13. #13
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    8,427
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 30 Times in 22 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    oh ok sorry!

  14. #14
    Banned
    Joined
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Cranberry Country
    Posts
    1,202
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    I don't ride a motorcycle, but do bike....but one thing they have in common is that the general public does not know how to interact with motorcyclist / cyclists, which leads to accidents, and deaths. Just paying attention, or giving a little extra room is all that is needed.....

    Though I have to admit i was shcoked when a few HDs flew by me within 1-2 feet when I was on my bike. You would think of any group of people would understand this its motorcyclists.

  15. #15
    God/dess Embyr's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Schlong Beach, Cauliflower
    Posts
    2,558
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 14 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    ^^^ Cyclists scare the shit out of me on the bike... I always go waaaaaay around them... give 'em as much room as possible. Rather, cyclists don't scare me (the ones who are obviously experienced & dressed for it), but BICYclists who swerve out into everyone's path... which I have seen many a time. I'm always afraid of hitting them, be it in my car or on the bike. I usually change lanes if I see bicyclists/cyclists.

    I'm interested as to what CuriousJ has to say if he sees this thread... he was just hit by a car on his HD and had pretty major injuries... Djoser's been in some severe accidents, too...

  16. #16
    Banned
    Joined
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Cranberry Country
    Posts
    1,202
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    ^^^^^

    Well I guess I shouldn't scare you, I always keep to the side, and have a rear-view mounted on my helmet to see whats coming up....

    ...though my cycling won't scare you, me cycling clothes probably will!

  17. #17
    Banned gingerlee's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Where the cool kids hang out.
    Posts
    4,103
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: So sad....

    That's so sad. I am so sorry Kaylinn. Reading this made me tear up because I know so many people that ride without a helmet, and something like what happened to your cousin is one of my worst fears.

  18. #18
    mermaidnz
    Guest

    Default Re: So sad....

    id read it too. i like to know details of anything importnat no matter how much it messes with my head in the long run.

    it cant be an easy thing to do, read about your own sons death like that, but some people need it for closure, and almost peace of mind, you know, so they know it wasnt a long terrible death.

Similar Threads

  1. so sad
    By myiah in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 03-01-2008, 10:02 AM
  2. So sad :(
    By exotisch23 in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 06-01-2007, 05:45 PM
  3. So Sad
    By MishaBliss in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 12-24-2006, 02:23 PM
  4. How Sad Am I?
    By PaigeDWinter in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 12-07-2006, 03:45 AM
  5. SAD SAD SAD!! kitty death...
    By playboycntrfold in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 31
    Last Post: 08-06-2004, 08:09 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •