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Thread: Tipping Issues

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    Default Tipping Issues

    This is a situation I haven't quite figured out. In a club where there are several girls on stage at once, I might want to visit to tip a particular girl, perhaps someone I am pretty friendly with. If she turns the wrong way at the wrong time, some other dancer will likelyhead over to me. No offense to the dancer in front of me, but she is not why I came to the stage. I don't want to offend her, but I do want her to go away. I usually give her a couple of bucks and say " I came to see so and so ". Is there a better way to handle this? I sometimes feel like I am playing musical chairs trying to time when to sit down.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    You may not realize it, but at many clubs that have more than one girl on stage at a time, each girl has a certain part of the stage that is "hers." If you are sitting in one dancer's section and want to tip another, you need to move to her section. Otherwise you are unintentionally causing a problem between them.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    I wish that were the case here, but the club I am thinking about doesn't operate that way. The girls are free to move wherever they like while on stage and there are generally anywhere from 3 to 6 of them on stage at a given time. I only visit a couple of times a month, generally just to say hello to a long-time friend in the club. At the time I visit, the club tends to be slow so the girls on stage are waiting for guys to come to the rail. I really am only interested in visiting with my friend but at that same time don't want to offend the other girls who are just trying to make a buck but whose attention holds little interest for me.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Um, I don't really think there is any way to handle this. Really - is it such a problem to just tip another dancer? You're at the stage = tip the dancers, I'm afraid. On the floor "I'm waiting for...." is good. At the stage - I don't think it works.
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    I usually just tip the girl a buck or two and tell her I'm waiting for a specific girl and that usually works. However, sometimes a second or third girl comes by and that starts aggravating me, but I do realize they're justing trying to make a living. I try to send signals I'm waiting for my friend by looking at no one but her and keeping my money out of sight but that doesn't always seem to work. I don't want to have to tip these girls but I don't want to offend them either by just waving them off. I did that once a few years ago and it didn't go over too well with the girl. Fortunately, the club I spend 95% of my time in has one girl on stage at a time so this problem is non-existent there.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    I usually just tip the girl a buck or two and tell her I'm waiting for a specific girl and that usually works. However, sometimes a second or third girl comes by and that starts aggravating me, but I do realize they're justing trying to make a living. I try to send signals I'm waiting for my friend by looking at no one but her and keeping my money out of sight but that doesn't always seem to work. I don't want to have to tip these girls but I don't want to offend them either by just waving them off. I did that once a few years ago and it didn't go over too well with the girl. Fortunately, the club I spend 95% of my time in has one girl on stage at a time so this problem is non-existent there.
    I understand that; I think what I was saying is that I don't think there is any way to courteously avoid doing it if you are choosing to sit at the stage. They are all on the stage that you are sitting at and there are no sections. They are not doing anything wrong. Like I said - the stage is not the same as the floor. You might consider either simply seeing this long time friend at some place other than the club, or buying dances and avoiding the stage if you really don't want to tip the other dancers.
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Bem, I'm with Jenny. If you're sitting at the stage, you MUST tip, EVEN if you only went there to get a certain girl's attention. So look: give the other girls a dollar each and say what you've been saying. $1 will prevent you from being rude, but will also prevent the other girls from thinking that you're a generous tipper, so they won't hang around you too much. And really... what's $3-6 if it means you've now got the dancer's attention and you don't have to go through the hassle again that night? And on the magnanimous side, you will have spared the other girls from one more aggravating customer situation. Everybody wins

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    I guess I have been handling it as diplomatically as possible then.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    I understand the gut feeling of not wanting to tip a girl that you may not care for but, in some settings, I think it's unavoidable and rude not to. Often, If I see a lady I like at the stage but don't particularly want to tip the other three or four girls I will walk toward the stage, make eye contact with her when she is between customers and hand her the tip without sitting down. I then walk away from the stage and wait for the lady to join me when she is done with her set. I don't really understand the reason for tipping a lady and then telling her that you are waiting for someone else to come over. Unless of course she asks you about a private dance in which case it is best not to lead her on.
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    But if I tip her on stage and don't tell her I'm really there for someone else, wouldn't that motivate her to come looking for a PD once she's offstage. And wouldn't this be even more likely to happen if things were very slow at the time?

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Here's a thought: quit tipping her on stage and give her the money at the table. Then you don't have to deal with other girls at the stage and you still get to tip and spend a little time with her. There is no rule that says you MUST tip your friend on the stage - it is just as effective if you do it at your table.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Dude. I'm not trying to be a dick, but it's a strip club, not a Rubik's Cube. You're thinking about it too much. If you don't have A dollar for everyone on stage, then don't go up. It's simple, it's courteous, and it's just proper customer etiquette. The real grief is caused, literally, by all the thought you're trying to put into saving a couple bucks, and in the end it makes you look like more of a dick. Why? Well, do you think the dancers you made a point of NOT tipping aren't going to talk about it?

    Hell, it could probably even cause stress for HER to have three or four dancers coming up to her and asking why you only tip her.
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Would it really be so hard to take a small part of your budget, $40 or even $20, and turn it into singles with the express purpose of not caring who you give it to, as long as they are on stage while you are sitting there?

    To a woman who has just spent 2 or 3 songs dancing half naked for a bunch of PLs, a dollar does not represent a commitment or even an invitation. To her, it's a dollar, your fee for being allowed a front row seat to her performance.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    Quote Originally Posted by bem401 View Post
    But if I tip her on stage and don't tell her I'm really there for someone else, wouldn't that motivate her to come looking for a PD once she's offstage. And wouldn't this be even more likely to happen if things were very slow at the time?
    Yes, any girl you tip on stage may end up coming over to you and asking for a dance. That is her job. The fact is, any girl in the club may come over and ask for a dance weather you tipped her on stage or not. You just simply say no thanks.
    I'm really not much of a stage guy anymore. I always go to the club looking for a specific girl with the intent of buying dances from her. I prefer to wait at a table or at the bar for her. If it's a dead afternoon and she is alone on the stage I will go up and tip just to pass the time and contribute a bit to her income but it's really just a prelude to the main event.
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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    so you're losing a couple bucks to a few other girls......

    i don't see the big deal. it's not like they're "out to get you" they're just doing what is normal on stage in their club. you tip them when you're stage side if they come up (and you may lose a buck or two, no biggy) and then you politely decline if they ask for a dance later. most girls have no problem with you saying you came to see someone else. in fact, most of us appreciate you telling us up front anyway.

    so.. when "your girl" is on stage.. you walk up with enough to tip each girl up there once. i'm still not getting the "issue".

    if the gripe is that you don't want to spend 5 more dollars at the club... you're being cheap.

    if the gripe is that you don't want to be "bothered" by girls "asking for dances" afterwards........... you shouldn't be in a strip club in the first place.

    girls you don't want a dance from are going to ask you. that's just the way it is. it's their job. there's no reason you should be "aggrivated" by it unless they completely hound you or won't take no for an answer.

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    Default Re: Tipping Issues

    All good points. I will continue to deal with it as I have. I never refuse to tip anyone on stage who comes over and I never try to be anything but polite when not accepting an invitation for a dance. Like Yoda, I am only visiting to see a specific one or two persons and don't fault anyone for just doing their job. I'd prefer not having to deal with the others because I don't like having to turn them down and some of them can be a little pushy, but I guess that comes with the territory.

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