So up until a month ago, I had the job of my dreams nannying for a wonderful child whose mother was actually my tv idol growing up. I had this job for 10 months, and it's crazy, I dont think I've been any happier in my life. The kid was amazing, the job perks blew my mind..I even was paid when I didn't work. People who saw me as "nothing BUT a stripper" envied the job, and it gave me TON of confidence that dancing had whittled away after many years. My boss jokingly told me one day that she would need me until the day her son was in high school. Then Dear Old Dad moved in, and she cut my hours completely and let me go.
I miss the kid so much it makes me feel sick inside. I'm back to what I was before, minus the confidence. I feel so beyond disposable. The way she let me go was so shitty -she had her assistant do it. It's strange how similar the loss of a job is to the loss of a relationship; I eat like crap, I sleep like crap, I think about the kid all the time at night, and I'm still in complete disbelief that my dream-job is just -poof!-gone. If this is how celebs are, I don't ever want to work for one again.
I came such a long way and now I am back to what I was before this family walked into my life. How will I make rent? How will I ever love a job as much as I loved that one? L.A. is so scary when you don't have a job and you are competing with the best of the best. I eat, sleep, and breath Craigslist and am quickly learning how f*ckin flaky Mom's out here can be, while looking for a nanny for their kids.
Sorry to rant. I would just rather be looking for a reasonably priced apartment in Manhattan over doing a Job Search in L.A..
Again.![]()



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But she doesn't matter. It's the kid I am hurting over. I am on my way over there right now to pick up a letter of recommendation and I know I'm going to see him and the rest of the day is gonna be super hard.


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