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Thread: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

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    Member Cypress Shade's Avatar
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    Default I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Just kidding. Its just that guys *think* they know how a dancer should do her job better, but she is the one with experience knowing what works and what doesn't.

    For example, quote

    "You should wear_____."

    No. You idiot. Thank you for telling me how to do my job, but I happen to know that you are most likely to open your wallet when I am wearing _____ (the brightly colored outfit that shows the most skin.)

    "You would make a lot of $ if you sat down with a guy and bought him a drink. That would make him feel special."

    Again, wrong. I have tried this. It doesn't make a guy feel special, it de-masculates him. Buying him a drink doesn't make him want to shower you with cash. In fact, usually customers don't even reciprocate the favor. If it worked, dancers would do this all the time. Don't think you're the first person to come up with this brilliant idea.

    It seems like every guy thinks he would rule the world "if I had a body like yours." I will tell you something. If your brain had my body you would be homeless on the street because you have no idea what the f*% you're talking about.

    Thank you!!!

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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Thise kind of guys are annoying. i especially hate the ones that say "why are you here on a slow night/ day shift? You would make so much more money on a weekend night." Right, when all the broke 18 year olds are crowding up the club, there's 2 to 3 times more girls working, and i would probably freak out over the crowdedness of the room. It's especially annoying cause i hear it so many times per shift. And if i didn't make any money working the shifts i do, wouldn't i have left already?

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    Veteran Member Heaven777's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I really can't stand....

    "You are too nice/smart/beautiful to be doing THIS..."

    Fucker, I WANT to be doing THIS!!
    If everything you try is a sure thing, you aren't taking enough risks. If you never fail, you put a limit on the degree to which you can succeed. In short, the only way to win big is to risk losing

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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cypress Shade View Post
    For example, quote

    "You should wear_____."

    No. You idiot. Thank you for telling me how to do my job, but I happen to know that you are most likely to open your wallet when I am wearing _____ (the brightly colored outfit that shows the most skin.)
    I hate these guys. When I wore the black/fishnet/gothy stuff guys told me "oh, you'd look soo much prettier without all that blaaaaack". Now I've decided I like to look like me on the off days, and Rose the stripper on work days-busting out my extra girly, pink-wearing side. So, the other day some bastard guy came up and told me that since I was short (b/c short = goth apparently), I should dress all gothy because guys dig that. He wanted to tell me ALL about it-how I needed to go get boots and fishnets and things. Ew.

    They are never happy.

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Oh man, this happens to me alot.

    its so annoying. they just think we are so "dumb" we donht even knhow how to do our job right! they think they "know" . lol.

    the other day this guy really pissed me off. he was tipping me, and i already had tons of dollar bills on my garter \from previous tippers...and he said, "you know, i dont think you should keep all those dollars on you. it makes customers not want to tip you....i mean....." he tried to go on with his theory, i cut him off and said "you know what? dont tell me how to do my job." he just got up and left. grr.

    in my experience, wen i have lots of dollar bills on my garter, more guys flock towards me, probably thinking "she must be good, look at all those tips!"

    some customers suggest i do my hair different or have a different outfit like how u said...but i think its just THEIR personal prefence....not really what works for mostly all customers, you know?

    they just think we are so "lost" we need someone to "help" us haha. stupid. oh well, let them have their "assumptions"....we are takin their money lol
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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Quote Originally Posted by Heaven777 View Post
    I really can't stand....

    "You are too nice/smart/beautiful to be doing THIS..."

    Fucker, I WANT to be doing THIS!!
    Oh yeah! This one guy sat me down , all seriously and asked me, "So why are you doing this? you are so smart and beautiful , WHY STRIPPING?!"

    I replied , "what? well what else would i be doing then, do you think?"

    He said, "theres TONS of things you can do! But stripping? i mean CMONNNN!" *rolls his eyes like thats the worst thging i could be doing or that its so pitiful*

    I replied as i was walking away, "well im sure i make more money than you. ALOT more. so im happy with it!"

    he was speechless haha.

    or they ask, "so......this is your only job? i mean..you dont do anything else?"
    Me :yeeep!
    Them : and uh...this pays all of your bills?
    Me : oh dont worry about it (little do they know, it pays the bills and THEN some )
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    Veteran Member MonicaF's Avatar
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    Thumbs up Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I hear you on this one...it would make me sick when guys would TRY to tell me how to do my job - as if because they were "regulars" they were suddenly experts.
    I remember in particular at the last club I danced in before I retired (well at least retired for now, lately I've really been thinking about dancing again) there was this one "regular", who I think really believed that because he was there so often that he somehow worked there, who told me that if I didn't "try to act so perfect" I'd make more money.
    Well excuse me you fat, gross, socially ill-equipt, M*F* for taking pride in myself, attitude and appearance.

  9. #8
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Well, come on. I mean, you're just a stupid stripper; obviously you don't know anything except where to score some drugs. You should listen to that nice man because he's telling you what HE wants to see, and it's obvious he is much more intelligent and successful than you are. And clearly every man in the world wants to see the same things he does.


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    Featured Member phillydj's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Meh..don't let it bother you to much. Remember, theres are the same male types who sit around and yell at the football coaches on TV every sunday about how they could do a better job yet didn't even make the high school team.
    I Would Never Belong To Any Club That Would Have Me As A Member - Groucho Marx

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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I hate this too! Why can't they keep their big fat know-it-all mouths shut?? My mom always told me the know-it-alls are the ones who don't know shit.

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    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I want to choke the ones who go on and on about what an easy job this is. I work the dayshift at a low-rent blue-collar titty bar in a broke neighborhood, and half the guys think I make thousands a day for doing nothing at all. Of course, these are the guys who don't tip or buy dances, so I don't know where they think all that money comes from. Argh. I want to choke them.

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    Featured Member iseestars's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I like it when they tell me that they like something I do or when I'm giving a lapdance, some input is nice, but yea, when they tell me exactly how to do my job - i hate it. Especially when they aren't even tipping.

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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    i love this conversation

    customer: why don't you work nights?
    me: i do sometimes, but i prefer days because of my school scedule
    customer: yeah, but i bet you'd make so much more on nights
    me: eh, not really
    customer: that can't be true, it's so dead during the day
    me: there's more customers at night, but less big spenders. it's a younger crowd. plus, there's also more girls. besides, we have a lot of regular daytime customers.
    customer: so you're telling me you can make (insert ridiculously high ammount) on a day shift?
    me: i didn't say that, but that's not common for a night shift either
    customer: ....says something about how that's either not true, or i must be doing something wrong or working at the wrong club ... then tells me where i should go and what i should do and how "there's no reason i should make less than (insert said ammount)".

    then of course they follow it up with "i had this one friend/ex/whatever who was a dancer and SHE used make.............."

    <3333333333333333333LOVE THAT CONVO<33333333333333333333

    L.O.V.E.I.T


    i love it almost as much as i love this one

    customer (on a slow day or night): so when does it get busy?
    me: lots of times (then i'll explain why it's slow.. monday/holiday week/summer/whatever)
    customer: yeah but, there should be more people in here


    ...................WTF do you want me to say dude?
    i usually just try to divert the convo to having fun with eachother.... and sometimes.. when they just refuse to "get over it"......

    this happens.........

    customer: man.. it must suck for you guys right now

    .......... again.................. WTF do you want me to say?

    yes it sucks. it sucks because you're sitting here telling -ME- how slow it is and how i must "not be making any money" instead of enjoying yourself and SPENDING YOUR MONEY on ME.

    i also enjoy it when customers tell me it's probably busy at other clubs and then tell me i'm wrong when i correct them.

    look douchebag, i -know- the clubs in tampa. i know girls who work at other clubs. i've worked at quite a few them, i know damned well that none of them are packed on a summer monday at 7pm

    i -KNOW- this.

    and i wish like hell i could see the look on their faces when they go elsewhere and are met with the same dead club athmosphere. sometimes i wish i could follow them there just so i could walk in the door and go
    "IIIIIIIIIIII TOLD YOU SOOOOOOOOO"

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Ehh, when a guy says that stupid shit, he's just saying what HE would like. I can't figure out if they really think they represent the opinions of ALL customers, or if they're just not thinking that far. My guess is the latter. Idiots.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    I once had a guy criticize my pick up line (He compared it unfavourably to a girl who sits down and says "Do you like pussy? Because I'm Pussy!" - which if it works, power to her, but so far from my style); I was all "Geez, man - clever wordplay like that is a little above me. You can't expect ALL of us to be THAT clever." He then told me that his girlfriend was a dancer and I needed to work on my approach. I asked for his girlfriend's number so I could call her and tell her that he just said that to me. Let's see what she says when you get home, hmm?

    He said no. Fucking wuss.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    ^LOL!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  19. #17
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Penny, when they start bitching about how slow the club is, remind them that a slow club means much more privacy in the lap dance room. Either they brighten up and buy dances, or they keep bitching because they wanted to reap the benefits of everyone else tipping the stage dancers without having to tip themselves. It settles the question pretty quickly.

  20. #18
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Yeah..love this so very fucking much. I usualy tell them "you;re right..I bank!! I mean when you take what you've spent(usually NADA)and multiply it by the amount of guys in here...well..that means I'm goimg home with...oh crap...NOTHING"

    If you "know the game" so FUCKING well...pony up the benjamins douchebag and stop asking for my number.

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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah View Post
    Penny, when they start bitching about how slow the club is, remind them that a slow club means much more privacy in the lap dance room. Either they brighten up and buy dances, or they keep bitching because they wanted to reap the benefits of everyone else tipping the stage dancers without having to tip themselves. It settles the question pretty quickly.
    oh i do all of that, which is what i meant by "try to divert the attention to fun"

    i'm talking about the ones who keep focusing on having that convo no matter what. you know, the ones who are probably cheap asses anyway.

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    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    If someone tries to tell me how to do my job, my favorite thing to say is, real sweetly, "Honey, I don't come down to WalMart to tell you how to greet the customers, so don't go telling me how to do my job." Other good ones are McDonald's, BK, etc.

    Usually it is good for a laugh from their friends and then they sheepishly stop that line of bullshit. I find that having a smartass remark for everything solves a lot of problems.
    Check out my new eBay auctions.......

  23. #21
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I love it when customers tell me how to do my job.

    Bahaha... that reminds me of an incident involving a waitress I used to work with. I shared it here once already but here it is copied and pasted from that thread...

    When I was waitressing at a fine Italian restaurant, we had this one heavyset waitress who was all sweetness all the time. One day it was a packed lunch rush, and she had this table of two bitchy suburban housewives, one of whom was running her ragged and treating her like an illiterate slave. Bitchy Housewife, at one point, demanded a straw, so Sweet Waitress went to the back for it, and noticed that her food for another table was ready. She stuck the straw in her apron and grabbed the tray, intending to deliver the food first and then drop off the straw. The tray was about as big and heavy as she was, very precariously balanced.

    So as she walks by, Bitchy Housewife grabs her arm and snaps, "Excuse me! My straw?!" Sweet Waitress came very close to dropping the whole tray of food. She struggled to keep it, and as she regained her balance, she suddenly snapped loudly, "Listen, lady! I don't go down to the bus stop and slap dicks out of your mouth when YOU'RE trying to work!"

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