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Thread: I want to quit.

  1. #1
    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    I want to quit.

    I've really had it. I used to love dancing. Not that it was ever the reason I got out of bed in the morning, but it WAS the reason I had a nice bed to get out of, and a nice place to do it. I used to love the bar atmosphere, the fun and excitement, the sexuality and the immediate gratification. It was one of only a couple jobs I ever loved.

    But lately . . . I dunno. The lack of actual money is making a big impact on me. I never worked in a top-shelf place, but I used to make as much in about 12-20 hours in my little rinky bar, as I made teaching school all week. That gave me a lot of freedom to be with my husband and kid. I was happy with what I made, in spite of the fact that I wasn't getting rich.

    This is not your usual summer slump. I have weathered those before. There is more going on here.

    For one thing, most of my customers are in sales or construction, both of which are in a big slump around here right now. The cost of living is going up, too, and the county has just raised the cigarette tax again. The Chicago market is one of the most expensive in the county for gas, electric, and heating gas. So people are really really broke around here. This has been going on for months.

    Now I am not only frustrated and broke, but also bored and defeated. Each day at work seems like an exercise in futility.

    For another thing, and I think this is worse, not just my bar, but the whole neighborhood is infiltrated with extras girls. There are still a few of us who try to give clean dances, but I know all of us have had to lower our standards. We really have no choice. Other girls are getting fingered or giving hand jobs for the price of a dance.

    I made the decision to pull my son out of school and begin home schooling him next year, under the assumption that I would be able to work as I have been for several more years. As it stands, with the amount of time I have to commit to working and driving, I would not have enough time to spend with him on lessons to make this feasible. Hence, one of the main reasons I continue to dance, my time-freedom, no longer applies.

    I need to get out. I'm no longer happy dancing. Trouble is, I can't figure out how to make time to go to school for something useful and at the same time, earn enough money to live. My husband works, but he makes enough, not an excess. And because of the way his 401K is funded, it makes sense for him to continue working where he is until next summer, when he will have been at his job 5 years.

    I have nothing else to add. I would say "/end rant" except, I can't get up enough energy for a good rant. The whole situation is making me feel defective and defeated and pathetic and sad. I think I'll go have a good cry now.


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    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

  2. #2
    242_fair
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I thought you are highly educated with several degrees. So I don't know why you are talking about re-training.

    Can you can get a secretary job or receptionist job or something? If the child is school age you can get a 9-5 job right?

    Ya home schooling is a luxury, doesn't sound like you can afford it next year.

    I think it would be more in the child's interest for you to get a full-time job, and let him go to regular school, so you can save for his college fund and aleviate your immediate financial problems.

  3. #3
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I'm not sure how it would work into your life, but you could make good money in midwest booking clubs. Maybe drive out there and work for 3-4 weeks every couple months.



  4. #4
    Vivacious
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    What about getting a full-time job and dancing one night a week? You might enjoy dancing again and make more money that way. And you'll be building your resume. I'd probably forget about the home schooling or anything else that's putting you beyond your means.

  5. #5
    Member theblondegeisha's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I completely understand how you feel. I was just in Chicago as part of my summer tour and couldn't believe how things had changed. Instead of getting a full-time crappy job that will only make you less available to your family and more frustrated, try a tour. I would recommend two Dallas clubs and two NYC clubs. And w/ur experience as a dancer don't bother w a rinky dink club... Go topshelf. Take a look at some of the big Dallas clubs that will pay your airfare and hotel to dance for a week or two. Bring your son and a best girlfriend who wants a vacation to watch him. Buy their tickets on hotwire.com, pay her $100 a day. You will easily make$500-2000 a night in those clubs with a big smile and some intelligent charm.
    The Blonde Geisha

  6. #6
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    Not to be rude theblonde geisha but you are giving her false hope and wrong information. There are no clubs in dallas that pay your airfare to come to work or were you can make close to 2000. Maybe 500-1000 but these clubs are hard to get hired at. Collen couldnt you go to a better chicagoland club like hbs or maybe some of the indiana clubs? I know you shoud be able to at least make minimum 300-400 a night at one of those places and they are not high end like scores or vips so they arent as picky with hiring and I have read those arent your type of clubs anyways. So maybe check around into something a little higher end than were you are now. The clientele will be better anyways and the more white collar customer would appreciate your experience, intelligence.

  7. #7
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I don't know of any Dallas clubs that pay airfare/hotel or offer those types of earnings on any consistent basis. How long ago were you at those places blondegeisha? Did you go there from another chain club or through a modeling agency? This just doesn't occur in Texas anymore.

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  8. #8
    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    Truthfully, we have considered touring. I lost some weight in the hope of getting some good pics, and then I gained some of it back, and now I want to loose some more. I have an appointment with the photog at the end of July. I know I can loose the weight. Child care is the big road block for me. My mom is not an option.

    I have also tried to get hired at the HB clubs and can't get past the door. I am really considering looking in another market.

    As far as my so-called education and prospects of a f/t day job, that is an ugly situation. I have two basically useless degrees. Once upon a time, I wanted to go to med school. I got my BS in Psychology, just to get a BS in something. And I have an AAS in Biotechnology which I was mislead to believe, would allow me to get a job in a hospital lab. That was an outright lie by the biology department at my school. The skills I learned for that one were outdated at the time the course was taught. I have looked into nursing, lab technician, Emergency Room Technician, Paramedic, and massage therapist. All would require extensive re-training. If anybody knows what can be done with a BS in Psychology with a minor in Literature and additional coursework in Business, please let me know.

    It is a sucky job market in this area, too.

    Upon reflection, I realize I am actually facing several problems:

    1. I need to make money NOW to get me through my immediate problems.
    2. I need to support myself for a few more years until I can figure out what to do with my life and make it happen.
    3. I need a exit plan from this business.


    My MySpace Page:


    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

  9. #9
    God/dess shasta's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    Substitute teaching, for short term anyway.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    in texas, a lot of people are drug counsellors for county and state jail parolees. i don't know how that would work in illinois, but you don't need a 4 year degree, all your clients come from the county, or most of them do, and it is easy to get paid.

    your psych degree would not be a hindrance in such fields, at least, even if you had to spend 12 or so months getting a certification to go with it.

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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    U and me both girl! I totally know what you are saying...I need to take care of some finacial commitments first but then I'd GLADLY downgrade my lifestyle for a full time steady job!

    I'm really glad I got the courage to dance, it has given me so much, finnacial and allowed me to really grow as a person, it was a wild experience and I proved to myself how strong I really am but now..I feel like it is time to graduate on to a different life...but I always remember it but yeah it just isn't fun anymore and way to stressful.. But I guess there is a time when you just need to know when to let go and move on..I'll always take what I learned with me!!!

  12. #12
    Veteran Member dancinslifoxxx17's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I don't know about the rest of the clubs in Indiana; but, the ones in Indy pretty much suck! This is the worst I've ever seen it! I made a total of 65$ tonight. Ooooo boy!
    It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird

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  13. #13
    Featured Member rusdancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    There seem to be a lot of people on SW (and some of my personal friends) deciding to retire for good,business really is very different from before,too stressful.I want to do it too,but untill something else lines up,I can't.My days are numbered though either way.
    Good luck to everyone trying to retire.

  14. #14
    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I've looked around, and there are maybe 3 things I have found that might suit me.
    1. I have most of the education to get my accreditation to work as a lab tech, and the rest of the courses would not be all that hard for me. The local community college offers on-line courses and once I get the degree, there are always openings to work at night. Hospitals give good bennies, too. OTOH, what a boring f-ing job.

    2. I am also thinking about an on-line book store, which would allow me to work at night, but would have all the drawbacks of being self-employed. Also, no particular education required. I got this idea form one of my customers, who said he started turning a profit almost immediately. IT has the advantage that it could become a family business, and it would be educational for my son to help with it.

    3. There is a company that will teach you how to give exotic dancing lessons and allow you to franchise a territory. This sounds fun, but like a lot of work.


    Soooo.....bennies or self-employed freedom? Start building something NOW or get more education first? Hmmmmm........


    My MySpace Page:


    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

  15. #15
    Vivacious
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    ^^those all sound like great ideas. I'd finish up the lab courses just so you always have the ability to get steady cash, and in the meantime you could start exploring #2 and #3 without having to depend on either one.

  16. #16
    Veteran Member Jenna78's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    From what I know about lab tech jobs they pay very little. Do you know the average salary and is it enough?

  17. #17
    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    I would personally do number 3 honestly. I'm looking to get in on something like that myself eventually. Why put all the skills I have and use currently to waste?

    I would love to perform and teach hula/hoola hooping, burlesque, "exotic dancing". I would leave the pole teaching to people like Alena who really knows her stuff.

    I vote #2 and/or #3 as it might be alot of work now yet ultimately having your own business would be better than having to work for someone else for peanuts. It will pay off.


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    Default Re: I want to quit.

    Business blows down here as well, and we have two military bases within walking distance.
    Our main problem is bad management that lets ANYONE work at anytime, and turns his head at the extras girls.
    It's gotten so bad that I'd make more money on Sun. or Mon. for the simple fact that the dancer/customer ratio is more even....and that's really not saying much.
    I have another job, but it doesn't pay well. That's why I'm in school now.

    All the best!!!

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