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Thread: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

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    Member tlove0113's Avatar
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    Default Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Hi ladies, this is my first post, but I have been lurking for awhile now. Anyway, I need some advice. Last night, a customer who always comes into my club kept asking me if he had done something to upset me, because it seemed as if I didn't like him. Keep in mind that he is very cheap, rarely tips the girls and might get one dance every few months. (I got one dance from him about 2 months ago). Each time he asked me I told him no and walked away. When I walked past him a 3rd time, he said he knew why I was upset, it was because he only got 1 dance from me and when it was over I walked out of the VIP and left the club. It was closing time. I'm sure that I did thank him for the dance, I'm not that inconsiderate. I finally decided to tell him what I really thought, he is a waste of space. I just don't like him, he's cheap and a waste of time. He said that he just comes to the bar for entertainment and works hard for his money and no one can tell him how to spend his money. I told him that we do as well, because we have to put up with a bunch of cheap assholes who want to touch you for free, stare at you all night and not spend any money on us, basically descriping him. I also told him that he should just rent a porno and keep his ass at home, because if you come into a club, girls are going to ask you for dances and if you rarely get them, what is the point of coming. We are at work also, he doesn't go to work for free, why should we. He told me that I was different from the other girls, because I have an attitude and he wonders what the other guys would say if they knew I felt this way. I told him that the other girls thought the same thing, they were just more willing to play the game with him that night and I wasn't. I work in Michigan, it sucks here. I probably did have an attitude because the bar has fell off so much and there isn't much money to be made. Was I wrong for revealing my true feelings to this cheap waste of space and air?

  2. #2
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Nah, fuck him. He's a waste of space and you can't stop him from coming in or change his mind. His opinion doesn't matter, other customers aren't going to listen to his ass. I have done this before many times with absolutely no qualms or regrets. At the least, it keeps them away from you in the future.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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    God/dess LuckiCharm's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    No you weren't wrong. I can't stand the customers who come in and just try to talk to the dancers and become friends with us. I'm sweet to all my customers, and I would never disrespect them, just as they would never disrespect me (good customers that is). But if they're not spending money on you, they don't have any connection with you. There's a customer in my club who always asks me to come "sit and talk to him" but he doesn't pay. Do I ever go over to him? Hell no.
    I don't think you did the wrong thing. He needed someone to break it down to him.

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    God/dess Zabrina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    He was useless anyways so no big loss burning bridges there.

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    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Quote Originally Posted by Zabrina View Post
    He was useless anyways so no big loss burning bridges there.
    yeah really... who the hell cares... what has he done for you lately???

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Well, *I* wouldn't have done it. If he buys drinks at all (or pays an admission), I'm sure the club would be upset... He also may tell other girls and customers about that conversation and try to rile them up. At the same time, I can understand losing your patience with some guy badgering you when he doesn't intend to buy dances.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Veteran Member Isolabella's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Eh, I try not to let anyone see "behind the curtain", but it has happened a couple times. Don't beat yourself up over it. I don't think he'll be wasting any more of your time.

    Btw, there is money in Michigan. I had to switch clubs recently to find it (after 15 years at the same one), but I'm so glad I did.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Time is a precious currency. Don't waste your own, or steal it from others. No matter how much you think they have, or how little value you give them. - Me http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=isolabella

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    God/dess gypsy_girlchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    I've rarely told custies how I feel, but when I do it IS along the same lines. There are certain guys that just irk me, and eventually I will let them know how I feel. They are the ones I actually tell that I am in a serious seven year relationship, this usually lets them leave me alone.
    Personally I don't care that they pay to get in or buy drinks, that's the admission fee, I don't get any of it, PLUS I pay to work there, so I end paying more than they do to get in. Guys know we are there to make money, it is a JOB and at any job you are going to employees that will make it known that they are there for the paycheck, not to just hang out.
    I wouldn't make it a habit to tell custies about the whole "it's a job" issue, but some people need to hear it now and then and realize that we need to get paid for our time. I have fave custies that I hang out with, but sometimes I have to tell them that I need to move on because it IS my occupation. This guy seemed to want your time for free without even earning your friendship first. And as for the club having a problem with it, you'd be surprised. They would rather have custies in that SPEND money on the dancers as well, since without the dancers there wouldn't be club. It doesn't always seem that way, but buigger spenders, or at least habitual spenders are always welcome rather than the gawkers.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



  9. #9
    Veteran Member fifi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Nah, Don't beat yourself up about it too much. And certainly don't feel bad for him. He asked- numerous times, and you told him. He was *literally* asking for it.

    I probably would have been more subtle. I would have ignored the question and tried to get away from him, and if he pushed, I would have said something to the extent of how I couldn't spend time with him because I'm at WORK and I have paying customers to attend to.

    But don't worry about it too much. It happens all the time and I've never heard of a dancer who had her rep compromised over telling off one broke-ass creep.

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    Veteran Member hearts's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    I think that this could have been a potentially bad thing for you to do. I would prepare yourself for damage control. If he is mad at you now, he will tell other dancers/management about what you have said, and he'll likely exaggerate it.
    The name of the game is to AVOID him. In fact, you should do this for any customer who wants to chat but not spend money. Be polite, say "hi", but then make an excuse to quickly leave. There are a million excuses: expecting a cell call, change clothes, pick songs, get a drink, go to the ladies room, talk to so-and-so....

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    Member tlove0113's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Thanks For The Advice Ladies!!!

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Meh, management and bartenders have high-fived me for telling off these annoying leaches. Sure, they may be in there sucking down a few drinks a few days a week. But they also start believing they are the bartender/manager's buddy. Just like they bother dancers for free attention, they start to expect free drinks from the bar, entrance passes, special treatment, etc.....as far as I saw, no one else cares about these assholes either.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    ^Agreed.

    I've had the same sitaution. This guy would hang at the bar where we go to get our drinks from, wanting to chat us up, RARELY if ever bought a dance, but was always willing to invite us to talk to him there or (gag) at his place. Maybe go out one night and party? BLAH!

    So eventually i got tired of the same damn conversation each and every time, wasting my time, and bugging hte shit out of me, he'd watch my stage, watch my dances (not just mine) etc, but NEVER ever tip or buy. So one night he asked me if I was in a bad mood when I sort of blew him off, I essentially told him the same thing you said.

    Damn, didn't mean to ramble on there, but anyway, don't sweat it. Guys like that are a pain in the ass all over the club, not just for you.

    There are barflies though, who buy drinks, come in night after night, don't bother the girls, tip now and then, but don't hustle anyone.....those guys I never mind. They are usually good islands for when you need to have some down time, but don't want to actually leave the floor.




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    Veteran Member fifi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Now that I think about it, I'd consider what you did a public service. I can't beleive how many guys are so clueless. They come in, watch the show, give us nothing, and then wonder why we're not all over them. Frankly, they need to be told. Maybe not always in such a harsh way (not to say they don't deserve it, but just to keep things going better for us, it's probably better not to get too agressive too often). But yeah, if they're wondering why they're not getting as much attention as the other guys, someone needs to explain to them how a strip club runs, and help them understand that we are indeed at work and are guaranteed no fixed income, and need to spend that time on people who are interested in paying us for the work we do.

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    Veteran Member dancinslifoxxx17's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    No biggie. These guys are just losers w/ no lives or money. He prob. thinks he's doing you a favor by getting a dance every other month. Oh boy! He's lame. So don't worry about what was said.
    It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird

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  16. #16
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Nah..I've said the same thing thousands of times. Usually if management even hears about it..they agree with me.

    He isnt spending money so you arent losing anything by speaking your mind. And he INSISTED on getting an answer from you. Dont INSIST on an answer if you dont want to hear it!

  17. #17
    TheSexKitten
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Gah we have like 5 or six guys like this, and all of them think they're the manager's friend!!

    I just ignore them completely. Sounds like you did something good! Maybe, hopefully, they'll go to a different club...?

    Wah I guess we can dream, right?

    High-five for you though!

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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    i've actually had customers bitch to me about those guys. the spending customers. and, if the management is any good, the (spending) customer is always right.

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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    There are many like that at my club, but one in particular who is pretty loathsome. Around Thanksgiving he brought in pumpkin pie that he made for us to eat. One of my friends went OFF on him, telling him that he is rude as hell to talk to girls without ever getting a dance and that pie does not pay our bills. He still comes in. Whenever he sees me he says, "Hi Summer, how are you?". I say, "Good", as I walk by, and I never ask how he is, cause I don't give two shits.

    Tell someone off if they really get to you. If you're spending that much time talking to someone who never buys dances then you are doing him a favor already. Don't speak to people like that. You're better off reading a book in the dressing room.

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    Veteran Member Asurfael's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Naah, you were absolutely correct in telling him that. I tell even guys who aren't regulars but who during the night approach me several times that they'd better have some fucking money in their hand before approaching me the next time if they seem reclutant to part with their money. If they persist I tell them my time is too precious to waste on their entertainment for no compensation, by which point if they don't have the cash in hand I walk away. Often they do run after me while desperately searching for some money - the few who don't go on to another girl to complain about what a bitch I was and usually spend a buck on them just to piss me off. Too bad they don't realize I don't care who they're spending it on as long as they're spending it If my being bitchy earns another girl a buck I'm all for it, especially if I don't have the patience for that custy anyway.
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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    Meh, management and bartenders have high-fived me for telling off these annoying leaches. Sure, they may be in there sucking down a few drinks a few days a week. But they also start believing they are the bartender/manager's buddy. Just like they bother dancers for free attention, they start to expect free drinks from the bar, entrance passes, special treatment, etc.....as far as I saw, no one else cares about these assholes either.
    Haha! That's an excellent point! One time a club regular offered to tell management to start doing favors for me since he was so important. "Say the word, I will snap my fingers and make it happen."
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Was I Wrong For Doing This? Sorry Kind Of Long

    I've never seen the management at my club get all worked up over it; I wouldn't tell a customer he was a waste of space, but I don't feel the need to be nice to them either. I usually say pretty meaningfully - "I'm here to work" and let it go at that. If they don't back off I just do the "okay, let's go for a dance". That works pretty well.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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