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Thread: Advice: Losing a Pet

  1. #1
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    Default Advice: Losing a Pet

    So...my mom's dog is barely making it at the moment, and I think it's going to be time to let him go pretty soon (probably this week ). I know my mom will want me to go with her, but it's going to be hard seeing her lose her baby (she's had him literally since the day he was born). I'm a really emotional person, too, and I'm already freaking out about how to handle this one.

    Just wondering if anyone can give me some advice on how to deal with her/what to say to her? I already feel lost because I know how she is (just like me when it comes to animals), so hopefully someone can help me on this one.

  2. #2
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Tell her that her dog wouldn't have had such a wonderful, loved existence without her care. Tell her that it's OK to be upset. But also remind her that it's natural for life to come to an end....

    There's really no easy way to help people grieve. Animals even grieve! But accepting Nature will make it easier...it's the best way to frame the situation...

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    Veteran Member missfOxxy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    my baby dog died like a month ago and i felt like dying... i wish i could tell you what to say to her, but when my dog died seriously there was nothing anyone could tell me to make me feel better, it's just awful pain only goes with the time.
    save a horse, ride a fox!
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  4. #4
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    I just keep thinking about the car ride home and how much it's gonna suck.

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    Veteran Member SweetMelissa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    I hope you both will be okay. Remember it's okay to cry.

    I had to let my cat go back when I was in high school. Long story short, my older sister let our cat go outside, she didn't keep an eye on him like the rest of us would, some dog came in to our yard, attacked, our cat being fearless/territorial/etc probably stood his ground which ended up with the dog grabbing our cat/whipping him around/etc....My older sister picked me up from school telling me that she said hi to him and he didn't move. She didn't even take the time to see what was the matter. Anyway....we sped to the vet with him once we got home and luckily my mother drove from work to meet me there.

    I hope you go with your mother. I'm sure she'll need you just like I needed support from my mom when I finally had to say goodbye. She said goodbye to him, left me alone for a minute to say goodbye on my own, came back and held me for a long time until it was time to leave. The vet. set aside a room for us to calm down in if we needed it before driving home but we were okay. I ended up bawling for days afterwards in the privacy of my room.

    Once my oldest sister found out (she was at work), she rushed home and gave me the biggest hug ever which was rare for her and me. She also bought a nice picture frame, put a picture of our cat in it and left it in my room for me to find when I woke up the next morning. She didn't have to say anything. Just hugging me and that little gift was enough.

    She did later hug me again when she heard me crying the next morning after finding her gift. She told me, "it'll be okay."

    Oh yeah, about the car ride home---it was awkward. It was silent--only our cries were heard along with blowing our noses.

    I was able to get through it by remembering all the good times we all had together even though that brought on more tears and still does...

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    Featured Member The_Oceans's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    When each of my family's pets were about to pass my parents took them to the vet; we had to let them go before they could suffer any more than they had. I can only imagine how my younger brother must've felt; even though they were family pets, he (and my dad) had really taken the lead in feeding them, taking care of them, etc. So they'd give them (our dogs Mikki and Coty, and our cat Misty) one last bath, so they can feel clean and warm and reminded of our family's love for them, before the drive to the vet. I couldn't bring myself to go with my mom and brother each time.

    Like SweetMelissa said, remembering the good times with our pets helps the most in getting through these moments. I always relished the early morning wakeups I got from our pets (even though my room was one that they weren't supposed to be in) - whether it was my cat climbing on top of my back while I slept, or one of the dogs licking my face if it hung off the side of the bed.

    "Women, not girls, rule my world" - Prince

    "No parking on the dance floor" - Midnight Star

  7. #7
    High_Heel_Lover
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    NO idea I am a mess over havign my dog kill bunnies who aren't even my pets! WIshing you strenght.

  8. #8
    God/dess xdamage's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Deni,

    You really don't need to plan ahead for these kinds of things. Just show up. You'll know what to say when the time comes.

  9. #9
    Veteran Member BmiWMT14's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Deni,
    There is no easy way to prepare for this. The best you can do is remind your mom of the wonderful life she gave the animal, and all the great memories she has of him. Just be there for each other, because there will be lots of grief, and tears. October will be a year that My dog Slade is gone, and I still get teary when I see pictures of him
    You Cant Quit until you try, You cant live until you die, You Cant learn to tell the truth until you learn to lie.You Cant Breath Until you choke,You gotta Laugh When your the Joke, Theres Nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive! Will you swear on your life, that no one will cry at my Funeral!
    Quote Originally Posted by cameron_keys View Post
    Yes please save me from this life of debauchery! You can all kneel down and worship at the Church of the Holy Clitoris to convince me!!

  10. #10
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Just be there. Let her cry with you. Talk to her if she wants to talk and let her be quiet if thats what she needs. Dont push her.
    Tell her that he is at peace now and will be wating for her at the Rainbow Bridge:

  11. #11
    Veteran Member BmiWMT14's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    cameron, Thanks I was trying to remember the name of the Bridge Poem
    You Cant Quit until you try, You cant live until you die, You Cant learn to tell the truth until you learn to lie.You Cant Breath Until you choke,You gotta Laugh When your the Joke, Theres Nothing like a funeral to make you feel alive! Will you swear on your life, that no one will cry at my Funeral!
    Quote Originally Posted by cameron_keys View Post
    Yes please save me from this life of debauchery! You can all kneel down and worship at the Church of the Holy Clitoris to convince me!!

  12. #12
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Thanks for all the advice, guys. I know it's going to be hard, but I know it'll be ok in the end.

    Just said, that's all.

  13. #13
    Veteran Member Casey4Now's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    A few years ago (10 maybe) there was a book on the best seller list. A man wrote a book on the life and death of his beloved dog. I purchased the book for a dear friend of mine who had just lost his dog of 16 years (it was really his baby as he had no children)

    He later told me that the book had helped him enormously (sp) After a short time he even got a new puppy, which before the book he had sworn off ever owning another dog.

    I am not sure the name of the book at this time, but will try to update as soon I I find the information. At the time I purchased it, I could only find it in Chicago.

  14. #14
    Senior Member mollywog's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    Sadly, part of being a good pet parent is knowing when it's time...... It's not right to let an animal suffer needlessly. Yeah, what the others said, remember the good stuff, and know that the correct choice, not letting the babies suffer is what's important. I've been through this with 2 cats since I "grew up", it totally sucks, but it did help me a little bit when people told me what I first mentioned. *hugs*

  15. #15
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice: Losing a Pet

    I don't really know what to say..When Prince died I had him cremated and they also took an impression of his little tiny paw prints. That really helped/helps me get through all the pain. Maybe you can suggest she cremates her little guy..
    When I look at his urn, it gives me a sense of peace that he's still here with me.
    My new love...is me !

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