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Thread: You know you are a stripper when…

  1. #1
    Veteran Member StevieStar7's Avatar
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    Default You know you are a stripper when…

    You know you are a stripper when…

    You are out in public and someone shouts out your stage name and your respond not realizing it wasn't meant for you.

    You start to think of your future purchases in lap dances. Example: it's gonna take 5 lap dances for me to buy this new bracelet

    You buy hand sanitizer and baby wipes in bulk and you don't have any kids.

    That sanitizer & wipes along with your boob job is a tax write off.

    You go out with 'regular' friends and feel the need to censor yourself on the dancefloor.

    You have two separate sections of your wardrobe and makeup - one for your 'regular' self and one for your 'stripper' self.

    Every pair of shoes you own has some sort of high heel.

    12pm is a REALLY early hour to wake up.

    6am is a normal hour to go to bed.

    Breakfast takes place before you go to sleep.

    Your pet has glitter in its fur.

    Drag queens ask you where you got your _____, when you're just walking down the sidewalk.

    You go out to a restaurant and bitch at the guy who took you to tip the waitress, the barmaid and the busboy.

    When a guy tries the pickup line "don't I know you?" and you immediately think he must be a customer.

    When the clerk hands you your change from the groceries and you try to take it in between your breasts by squeezing them together with your hands.

    You buy something for $50 and pay in singles.

    You get dressed and undressed while not removing your shoes.

    You don't own any porn, but you've met more porn stars than most people can imagine.

    You don't get offended when someone says "nice tits".

    You have to "think" when you introduce yourself.

    A "C cup" no longer seems impressive.

    You know why baby oil is evil.

    You never think of a fire station pole in the same way.

    You hear a good song on the radio and automatically start thinking of how you can work it on stage.

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    God/dess greenidlady1's Avatar
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    Default Re: You know you are a stripper when…

    Or you have been one when..

    You can get dressed and undressed at lightning speed.
    You can spot a previous or current entertainer from a mile away (boobs, hair, etc.)
    You get pissed off when guys gawk at you in public and you look like hell.
    Your energy comes at about 6pm.
    You become a human lie detector.
    You can go from plain jane to rock star in one hour.
    You make a deposit at the bank of 1-5k cash and teller asks you what you do.
    You can make someone feel like a million bucks in about 5 minutes.
    You walk in a restaurant and see a group of guys sitting together and starting counting how much money you could make off them.
    You can run in a pair of really high heels through an airport.


    I am sure I'll think of more later..

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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: You know you are a stripper when…



    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

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    Default Re: You know you are a stripper when…

    Quote Originally Posted by greenidlady1 View Post
    Or you have been one when..

    You can get dressed and undressed at lightning speed.
    You can spot a previous or current entertainer from a mile away (boobs, hair, etc.)
    You get pissed off when guys gawk at you in public and you look like hell.
    Your energy comes at about 6pm.
    You become a human lie detector.
    You can go from plain jane to rock star in one hour.
    You make a deposit at the bank of 1-5k cash and teller asks you what you do.
    You can make someone feel like a million bucks in about 5 minutes.
    You walk in a restaurant and see a group of guys sitting together and starting counting how much money you could make off them.
    You can run in a pair of really high heels through an airport.


    I am sure I'll think of more later..

    ::: what club do you work at?::: lol
    But yeah,these are all right on point.

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    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: You know you are a stripper when…

    OMG..I've had to stop myself 3 times this week from giving someone my stripper name !
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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