I can't tell if I am emotional because I am getting my period, or if I am really just very, very sad.
All night at work tonight (which the worst night I have had in as long as I can remember) I just wanted to cry. I miss Miami soooooo much, and I had a huge fight with my friend as soon as we drove into town (Baltimore) which I guess started me off on the wrong, lonely foot. I hate starting over, and now I am starting everything, school, work, everything, over without any frame of reference and it has really got me down. The workload at school seems overwhelming, but I got in to a really selective program so I suppose I am capable of doing well. But grad school, in general, is just plain tough.
By and large I have been working my ass off since I drove out of Miami to get my life together as fast as possible, and I really feel like I am doing a shit ass job. Yesterday I finally got full on electricity, after 6 days in my apartment, and that has helped a ton. But I am still really emotional, like, bummed out.
Apparently the doorgirl at the club I worked at tonight is in the same boat at my school on my campus, I MUST commiserate with her. But first i have to meet her.
Argh, on the last night at my club in Florida I randomly broke out crying at the bar for no apparent reason right before I had to go onstage. Tonight I had to like talk myself out of it because I thought it was going to happen again. I am not a crying type of girl, I hardly ever cry. Weird. I think it has little to do with the club or the city or anything...maybe I am just really stressed?



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*hugs*




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