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Thread: Lead him on or be nice?

  1. #1
    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Lead him on or be nice?

    Okay, I pretty much know the answer to this already, but I wanted to see what you girls think.

    Last night I came across a guy who got one dance from me and asked me if we had a CR, I say "yes!" He says "how much?"

    I tell him and he says "Yah, I already knew, I've been here before, I just wnated to see if you'd be honest about the price." (That part is important)
    "Ok." pause "so....do you want to go then?"
    "Yes!"

    Great, we head off to the CR, he buys a spendy bottle, is a total gentleman the entire two hours, we talk mostly, did a few dances, really it was a great CR time.
    A lot of the conversation was centered around how "normal" I am, not all fake and playing him. He repeated this several times.
    Then the hostess came by, telling us our two hours were up and reminded my customer that he had the option to "tip your entertainer on the credit card or by cash if you'd like"

    He says "Oh, she's wonderful! I plan on taking care of her with cash, easier for her to spend!" Big smile, laughs all around. Okay great....

    So we're wrapping things up, and he says to me, "I'd like to take you to dinner, a real dinner, and get to know you. Nothing sexual, I want to know your mind."
    So....after reviewing our night in my head, the conversations and how this all started, I gave him this answer;
    "I'd enjoy that I'm sure, but I have to be honest with you, I don't date outside of work. I'd love to get to know you more though, and really hope you come back again to see me."

    Well this guy got straight pissed off!

    "Oh, well, then I guess you made a killing tonight huh? Good for you. Hope you enjoy that hard earned money, how much dancing do you think you even did tonight? And I told you, I don't want sex, I just want to know you. Bye."

    Stomped out. Pissed off. No tip.

    Hmmmm, should I have led him on and played the "sure I'd love to go out with you! (insert giggle and hair toss) leave me your number and I'll call you!" Or was it a lost cause to begin with?

    It's not that thist particualr guy is bothering me, or even this particular situation, but I wonder of sometimes it's better to go ahead and lead them on, or sometimes it's better to be straight forward with the guys...and when is the right time for which one?




  2. #2
    cameron_keys
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    He sounds like a borderline(or even not so border)psycho. Good riddance. He "tested" you and then went on and on about how honest you were and how wonderful that was...and as soon he got an honest answer he didnt like he went ballistic???

    If you had led him on it could quickly have become a dangerous stalker incident. You did the right thing.

    As for leading them on..if a guy doesnt give off a creepy vibe...the lead on can be profitable. I'd never promise something I wouldnt go through with(so I'd never say I'd absolutely go to dinner if I had no intention of ever doing that)but I'd be vague..." I just got out of a relationship and I'm not sure if I'm ready to date yet. I really liked spending time with you though...give me some time to think about it" or "I promised myself I'd never date anyone I met here...it just doesnt seem like a good idea to mix business and pleasure...and it would be odd to date someone who saw me naked before our first date..giggle giggle...I'll def, think about it though..I had a lot of fun with you"

    Truth technically...yet give hope without promises.

  3. #3
    God/dess sxybrat07's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    I agree with Cam, had you lead him on, it would have only gotten worse later on. At least you made some money off him, and he was polite while you were in VIP.
    I believe you Dottie and you have my support

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    Sounds like a snot to me.

    The ones that say they don't want sex are usually lying. They want to 'get to know you' with the intention of working you into a horizontal position. If he were a man, he would respect your position of not meeting customers outside of work. Those who don't can be potentially dangerous. I think you did the right thing.

  5. #5
    God/dess LuckyOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    Quote Originally Posted by StrawberrySwitchblade View Post
    Sounds like a snot to me.

    The ones that say they don't want sex are usually lying. They want to 'get to know you' with the intention of working you into a horizontal position. If he were a man, he would respect your position of not meeting customers outside of work. Those who don't can be potentially dangerous. I think you did the right thing.
    Yup. He just said all that crap because he thought he'd have a better chance of getting in your pants.

  6. #6
    Featured Member lolagetz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    I think you did the right thing. After you start leading him on, it can only get messier, especially with the way this guy sounds. I think you got the most you could out of him safely -- your safety and peace of mind are worth much more than whatever tip he would have given you.

  7. #7
    miss marina
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    Ugh, Guys like that are def.a little off. He was saying he liked you because you didnt pretend to be all fake and pretend to like him, so then your honest with him and he flips out and stomps out over something he said he liked in the first place? If you did lead him on, he sounds like the type to make your (club)life hell until you finally did go out with him. You did the right thing!

  8. #8
    Featured Member sunnie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    I think making up every excuse in the book is preferrable to saying outright you don't date outside the club if you can help it. I usually relate it to trust issues and being scared because guys have followed me outside of the club. Which is totally true (and they were not spenders or regulars, just a couple of whack jobs that get their kicks scaring girls), and most guys respect that. I tell them it takes time to build trust, yadda yadda. Oh, I guess that is leading them on. I guess my vote then is the leading on.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  9. #9
    sun child
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    He's a psycho, and you did the right thing. Know your mind? That's fucking bullshit. He wanted to fuck you, he tried to manipulate you into going to dinner with him, and then he was an asshole when you said no. Fuck him.

  10. #10
    Veteran Member fifi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    I think your response was the epitome of class. In fact, I'm going to memorize it word for word so I can say that when guys ask me out at work.

    You DEFINATELY did the right thing. So much better that he showed his true colors now. If he got pissed over that, imagine how much worse it would have been once you'd been leading him on for a few weeks/months.

  11. #11
    Alaska
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    He's also gay if all he wants is "to get to know yr mind." Oh wait, he's not gay. 2 hours in the CR....crazy ass.

  12. #12
    Senior Member ITgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lead him on or be nice?

    In this case I say it's better you didn't lead him on. Real stalker potential, and at least he hates you now, so he won't get all psycho love murderous on you.

    Any other time, tho... GO FOR IT! $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

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