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Thread: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

  1. #1
    Featured Member dangerousdiva's Avatar
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    Default Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    I think I've lost my hustle. I'm still making money but it's been SO MUCH HARDER and taking so much longer to do it.

    I know it's summer and it's slow but the club is packed. Now, I've justified this by saying to myself that there's no quality customers, just partier's coming in for a looksie.

    I've had to suck it up and do more lap dances than ever to make money, but the customers I've encountered have been SO DAMN RUDE and grabby. It's like they're out to deliberately sabotage me, pulling over to their table chatting with me, all the while saying they want a dance, asking questions about the VIP and then NO GO. After I've wasted my time. It's making me ruthless!

    Example 1
    One guy pulls me over to his table and wants a dance, but needed to go the bathroom first and wanted me to wait. I made him give me $60 as a "deposit". He comes back, says, "never mind, I don't have a half hour to spare anymore", I give him a dirty look so he hands me $20. Whatever I go on my way, but I notice he then pulls another dancer to his table and they hang out. WTF!

    Did I handle this situation right? Did he just all of sudden decide he didn't like me? Was I too pushy about the deposit thing? I mean the club was packed so I needed to make money or move on.
    Did I do something to lose the sale or was he just playing some kind of retarded game?

    Example 2
    Talk to these very nice guys for about 10 to 15 minutes, they are very interested in the VIP, so we get up to go and I ask which room he wanted to go to. He wants to know which is the best..."of course the Champagne Room blah, blah", as we enter it he all of sudden wants to know, EXACTLY what goes on in there, I reply with the typical, you get me all to yourself uninterrupted, it's quieter and a more intimate dance...he's like "what I don't get laid? $450 is a lot of money!" I was like," No we don't do that here..." He said," then never mind". I was so infuriated, I laughed loudly in his face and yelled, "What you thought you got laid in a Strip club what kind of pathetic hard up loser are you?"

    What's happening to me? What am I doing wrong? It's making me so mad! I think I need another club doesn't attract these kind of young, partiers that think they are so cool. It's messing with my head.

    Normally I can just brush these situations off, and move onto the next customer, but it's practically eveyone I approach! In order to make any money I have to tolerate so much BS.

    Here's the problem, I've become to so used to my hustle there, I'm scared I won't know how to make it at a more upscale club that requires more of a "talking hustle".
    How do you know you're not wasting your time sitting with a guy and hoping he will spend? I've gotten so used to the quick, one song convo that ends with "wanna dance", I've lost my skills, seriously.

    I need a change off pace, bad, but I don't know where to go.
    I want to try more rural areas closer to home and not return to LV until November, but my confidence is so battered I'm worried I won't know how to hustle different clientele. I think every customer is out to waste my time while trying to grope me and screw me over. LV has turned me into a ruthless little bitch!

    Has my club ruined my game?
    Last edited by dangerousdiva; 09-11-2007 at 04:18 AM.

  2. #2
    God/dess anomar's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    Example 1
    One guy pulls me over to his table and wants a dance, but needed to go the bathroom first and wanted me to wait. I made him give me $60 as a "deposit". He comes back, says, "never mind, I don't have a half hour to spare anymore", I give him a dirty look so he hands me $20. Whatever I go on my way, but I notice he then pulls another dancer to his table and they hang out. WTF!

    Did I handle this situation right? Did he just all of sudden decide he didn't like me? Was I too pushy about the deposit thing? I mean the club was packed so I needed to make money or move on.
    Did I do something to lose the sale or was he just playing some kind of retarded game?

    Example 2
    Talk to these very nice guys for about 10 to 15 minutes, they are very interested in the VIP, so we get up to go and I ask which room he wanted to go to. He wants to know which is the best..."of course the Champagne Room blah, blah", as we enter it he all of sudden wants to know, EXACTLY what goes on in there, I reply with the typical, you get me all to yourself uninterrupted, it's quieter and a more intimate dance...he's like "what I don't get laid? $450 is a lot of money!" I was like," No we don't do that here..." He said," then never mind". I was so infuriated, I laughed loudly in his face and yelled, "What you thought you got laid in a Strip club what kind of pathetic hard up loser are you?"
    In the first situation you didn't handle it correctly, in my opinion. I think that his fear of you running off with his $60 is bigger than yours of him just ditching you... after all, you'll find out within five minutes or so, and $60 is worth ~10! He probably was peeing and thinking more and more that he did not like the interaction between you two. In that situation maybe a good idea would have been to say 'Great, well that's on the way to the dance area [even if it's not, really] let's head over together! I'll guard the john' or something along those lines. Being eager to hang out with him instead of chilling w/ his dough...

    In the second situation, that guy was just a douche. When he's a douche it's fine to go off on him. He explicitly expected to get laid for $450 and wasn't going to settle for less without yelling, screaming 'n demanding a refund.

    I don't have too much advice from you. I took about six weeks off from the club that I worked at for over ten months. I'm going back in tonight. My hustle went to crap. Hopefully it's re-energized.

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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    ...the customers I've encountered have been SO DAMN RUDE and grabby. It's like they're out to deliberately sabotage me, pulling over to their table chatting with me, all the while saying they want a dance, asking questions about the VIP and then NO GO. After I've wasted my time. It's making me ruthless!
    You're not being treated as a individual - you're being treated as a dancer. Good odds that most guys who are rude and grabby don't realise the real you is different from the person you are ITC.

    Most guys will never get to know you as a person - because you stay within your 'dancer persona' while working. They come in with a stereotype of a "stripper" in mind and treat you accordingly. Unfortunately, that stereotype doesn't allow for the fact you have feelings and can be hurt by crass behaviour.

    All you can do is realise they're being rude to 'dangerousdiva' and not to you as a person.

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    One guy pulls me over to his table and wants a dance, but needed to go the bathroom first and wanted me to wait. I made him give me $60 as a "deposit". He comes back, says, "never mind, I don't have a half hour to spare anymore", I give him a dirty look so he hands me $20. Whatever I go on my way, but I notice he then pulls another dancer to his table and they hang out. WTF!
    Not a good move. Most guys like to maintain the illusion that it's not all about money - that you get some personal enjoyment out of dancing for him too. What you did was remind him it was all about money. For the male of the species that's a real passion killer.

    OK, you want to earn, but you've got to hide it a bit better.

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    ...I ask which room he wanted to go to. He wants to know which is the best..."of course the Champagne Room blah, blah", as we enter it he all of sudden wants to know, EXACTLY what goes on in there, I reply with the typical, you get me all to yourself uninterrupted, it's quieter and a more intimate dance...he's like "what I don't get laid? $450 is a lot of money!" I was like," No we don't do that here..." He said," then never mind". I was so infuriated, I laughed loudly in his face and yelled, "What you thought you got laid in a Strip club what kind of pathetic hard up loser are you?"
    The first problem might be stereotypes again - if his mates have bullshitted him he's going to get laid in the champagne room, then he'll react in the above manner when he's finding out he's not.

    As the risk of being of being a customer telling a dancer how to do her job, I'd suggest you say something like:

    "I'm far too nice a girl to sleep with people for money, and I'm sure you would feel uncomfortable the next morning when you realised you'd paid for sex. Why don't I give you as erotic a time as I can while staying within the club's rules?"

    It's a far less confrontational way of dealing with the situation than the one you used. You ended up with a nasty taste in your mouth, and I'll bet he did too. Calling him a 'pathetic hard up loser' also gave you no chance of getting any money out of him at all.

    Maybe he would have settled for some lap dances if you had have handled it differently?

    Not saying the guy didn't behave like an anal retentive - just there are alternative ways of dealing with the situation that might have let you walk away with some money.

    Hoping this helps....

    Phil.

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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    IMO, at that particular club yes, I think those guys were just messing with you cuz they're so used to the mind games. I'm NOT knocking the club- I know you can make a lot of money there. But it takes its toll emotionally.

    Just last night a girl from my club was talking about one customer that came over from that club and was so rude. It's like "common knowledge" that that club has the most hardened customers and but the most assertive girls. This is both good and bad. (A lot of potential, but you have to be STONE to deal with some of the crap!) The second thing is this year is just not as good as it used to be (at least YET.) And we still aren't *really* into the season yet...

    But no- you haven't lost your hustle. One good night and your self-esteem will shoot right back up where it belongs.

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    Featured Member dangerousdiva's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    Phil-W, you offered some great advice! A year ago that's how I would have responded to these situations and I still made money because it made me stand out form the the other hardened hustlers. Maybe I've allowed myself to become a product of my environment?

    Thanks LuckyOne for your response. You're right, unfortunately, the tactics I described are the norm at the club I work at. Thanks for understanding

    As in example 1, you have to ask for money up front, when the guy wants you to sit and wait, cuz going to bathroom when the club is packed takes 10 - 15 minutes. Also, during prime time girls hustle the guys walking more than the guys sitting, because the guys sitting have tipped to get their seat and thus are not apt to move right away. So, the guys walking or standing are accosted every 5 seconds for a dance, so I could have lost him and sat there wasting time. You also play this game that you are in high demand so they have to go right now because someone else wants you...

    If guys want you sit and wait, you have to make sure you are getting paid. In example 1, I did lurk to see what the guy and dancer did and they didn't get up to do a dance. As frustrated as I was at least I did get $80 for wasting my time.

    I guess the thing is, this type of hustle is taking it's toll and sucking the life out of me. It is ruthless and fast pace. What I worry about is whether I can tone it down if I am to work in a different environment because I'm so used to the "wanna dance" hustle.

    If any guy wants any amount of time other dancing you put him on the meter. God, one time I even charged a guy that was to whacked out to find the ATM $30 just for to take him to it. Yes, I did try to hustle dances from him ( NO GO ) and I did point it out to him but he couldn't get it so he needed an escort.

    I really want to try working at other clubs in more rural areas and in LV but I need to brush up my hustle skills. I have become so AGGRESSIVE. I need a change of pace because even though I'm making money I have no respect for the customers and come home very unhappy. I want to be excited about going to work again!

    How do you guys know when sitting and talking that they will spend.? That's my biggest worry. In more relaxed atmospheres how long should you chat before popping the question?
    Last edited by dangerousdiva; 09-15-2007 at 02:24 PM.

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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    I think you just need a break from that one certain club. Who wouldn't with that kind of environment? I wouldn't worry too much about your hustle, you will adjust once you're in the new environment. It's not like switching clubs in Vegas is the same as switching to Nebraska! You won't have to slow yourself up that much when it's busy. In other words, you are thinking about it too much, just do it and you'll be fine. You are gorgeous and a great person too and you deserve to make money happily.

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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    You work in Vegas, right? When I work at clubs with high foot traffic, in extremely busy cities.. I work like there's not any time to waste. If you spend too much time with multiple people (time when they're not paying you) it's mentally draining, as well as financially draining. That wasted time could be spent making money off someone else. When I work at slower clubs, I spend a little more time with customers, especially if there's not really anything else to do but sit with myself, lol.

    I agree with what you said about playing the 'in demand' card. If guys see something they can't have, they want it. Men are hunters. There's a chance that even if u hadn't demanded the 60 dollars from him up front, he might have changed his mind anyways. Customers can be really fickle. When my club is busy, and a guy says he has to go to the bathroom first, I usually tell him that I need the money it costs to rent the room out first. (ie. the portion of the money that goes to the club.. not me). I explain that since it's busy, I want to make sure we book the room so we don't lose our spot while he's doing his 'business.' This way, even if they come out of the bathroom and decide they don't want the dance anymore, I still keep the money he used to 'reserve the room.' And if he does decide to go through with the dance, all he has to do is now pay for your portion of the costs, since he already paid for the room. It doesn't sound as pushy, this way.. Win/win situation. Hope this helps!

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    Default Re: Help! I think I've lost my hustle!

    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousdiva View Post
    Maybe I've allowed myself to become a product of my environment?

    ...I guess the thing is, this type of hustle is taking it's toll and sucking the life out of me. It is ruthless and fast pace.

    ...I have become so AGGRESSIVE. I need a change of pace because even though I'm making money I have no respect for the customers and come home very unhappy. I want to be excited about going to work again!
    Our minds don't work in a completely logical way.

    What we do is develop a view of the world, then look for evidence that proves or disproves that view.

    Being what we are, we tend to give more weight to evidence that proves what we think than to evidence that disproves it.

    If you've lost respect for customers, then you'll give more weight to incidents that confirm it. You'll remember every rude, every grabby, every cheapskate customer, and you'll tend to forget the nice, spend money type customers.

    As has been suggested by the dancer's who've responsed, maybe a change of club would help.

    If you get back to remembering the nice customers more than the nasty ones, maybe work will start to excite you a bit again.

    Phil.

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